The Memory Keeper
by wolfienur
Summary: 'The stranger started to advance on me. He stopped abruptly, straightened up and I saw those mesmerizing eyes of his widen, looking frightened. His lips started moving. Squinting my eyes, I could see the words he was forming. "I'm sorry."' OC/OC ON HIATUS
1. Fire Eyes

**I present to you: the re-edited versions of Chapters 1 to 3. Enjoy. :)**

**Rated T for some mild language here and there. Nothing to be shocked about.**

* * *

**1. Fire Eyes**

"It's f-freeezing! W-why is it s-s-so freezing?"

I rolled my eyes. "Gee Kev, maybe the fact that it's eight o' clock on a January night has something to do with it."

"Your sarcasm stings, Kelly," Kevin said, giving me a dirty look. Lex, my best friend and Kevin's twin sister, smacked her brother's arm and told him not to be so sensitive. This caused him to elbow her in the ribs, so she retaliated by squeezing the back of his neck—a spot where he was extremely ticklish.

"I love watching the dynamics of their relationship, don't you?" My other best friend, Cammie whispered. I laughed in response.

The four of us – Cammie, Lex, Kevin and I– trudged on, on the snow covered paths of Central Park. We were on our way to the senior ice-skating party.

"I'm so excited!" Cammie squealed, while tucking all of her wavy, blonde hair into her hat to keep it safe from the ferocious wind. "I've practically spent my entire high school life waiting for this thing. Magical things can happen on ice…"

Kevin, Lex and I groaned in unison. Cammie could be such a romantic at times.

"What?" She said defensively.

"You watch _way _too many chick-flicks," Kevin teased.

Cammie and Kevin were throwing comebacks at each other, so I sort of slipped out of the conversation and gazed at the snow in wonder. Living in Manhattan, you don't get this much clean, fresh snow, so when it does come, I'm ecstatic. I've always loved snow. And wind. And ice. The cold in general. The polar opposite of nearly everyone else who goes to my school, with the exception of Lex.

Out of nowhere, a snowball came flying right into my face.

"KEVIN!" I screamed, knowing exactly who the culprit was. When I cleared the white powder off my face enough so that I could see, Kevin was running around wildly, laughing and throwing snowballs at all of us.

"Lex," I complained, "your brother's an ass."

"Try living with it," she grumbled.

* * *

I'm sure Lex didn't mean to show off, but…well, we were jealous nonetheless. She'd been ice-skating since the age of seven, so now there she was, leaping and spinning on the ice all graceful and in her own world.

"Wanna take a break?" Cammie asked me, after falling for the millionth time.

"Sure. My feet are _killing_ me!"

Cammie and I wobbled on our skates up the ramp to the rental/food building. All the students were given a coupon to exchange for a free hot chocolate.

"Oh my god, look at that line," I said once we were inside. The little snack 'shack' was to the left of the rental counter and the lockers and benches to the right. "We should sit while the lines thin out."

Cammie shook her head. "It's not going to thin out. People are coming in all the time – Ahh!"

I jumped. Cammie gripped my arm and turned beet red. "It's Michael, hide me!"

"God, woman," I chuckled, "how do you expect him to ask you out if you won't even show yourself to him?"

Prying her fingers off of me, I went in line behind Michael. Cammie just stared at first, but finally got the message and followed me.

"Maybe we should sit after all," Cammie tried tugging on my coat sleeve in the direction of the lockers.

I sighed. "Cameron Olivia Smith. You have liked this boy since sophomore year, and you haven't done a thing about it. I won't let you chicken out of merely _talking _to him, because by doing so, you are setting yourself up for huge regret later, while robbing him of the chance to talk to a beautiful girl at the same time."

Cammie rolled her eyes. She thought I was just saying these things because that's what friends were supposed to say, but I was dead serious. Cammie was adorable, with her blonde shoulder length hair, light blue eyes and petite frame. She and Lex – full name Alexandra – both had that in common. They were short and cute whereas I was tall and, well, not.

I turned my attention back to Michael. He was talking to his buddies, not paying any attention to us at all. I planned to change that.

"Cammie, I can't even count the number of times you fell on the ice. You need skating lessons." I announced loudly. Cammie scowled at me just as our history teacher, who is a total creeper, piped up from behind us.

"I could always teach you, Cammie." Insert gross, goofy grin here.

Michael nudged Cammie's arm and whispered, "Looks like Mr. McLowry wants to get to know you a little better."

Cammie's face burned up in embarrassment. She might've even gagged a little.

I turned my head so that Cammie wouldn't see me laugh. My head happened to turn toward the door though, and in walked the most gorgeous subject of the male species I had ever laid eyes on.

My heart started beating extra fast, like it was trying to get out and give the guy a smooch or something. Which was gross, if you thought about it.

He looked about twenty, twenty-one at most. His skin was pale, as if the moon outside had bleached his face of colour. He had straight, honey blonde hair that swept to the side and hung over his eyes. Oh, god, his eyes. They were a startling shade; a strange mix of harsh red and light orange. Like the color of a campfire. They were narrowed and darting from one side of the room to the other, until finally they settled on a spot.

Me.

We locked eyes for exactly three seconds, and in those three seconds I was scared.

Those eyes – _his_ eyes – narrowed to slits and his fists clenched together so tightly his knuckles turned even whiter than they already were. I didn't know how that was possible. The stranger's perfect, ruby lips were set in a grim, straight line. His nostrils flared.

I was confused. Was this guy mad at me? Did I know him? No.

Surely I would've remembered his face. His eyes.

He started to advance on me, back hunched a little bit and lips slightly curled back. His strides were quick and graceful. He was only about two arms' lengths away when he stopped abruptly, straightened up and I saw those strangely mesmerizing eyes of his widen, looking frightened. In spite of myself, I wanted to go over there and give him a hug. Tell him not to be afraid. But some part of me wouldn't allow it. The stranger shook his head, as if clearing it, and focused his eyes back on me. His lips started moving. Too quickly. I think he realized I couldn't understand because he slowed them down. Squinting my eyes, I could see the words he was forming.

_Sorry. I'm sorry._

Was he saying sorry to _me_? What for? For being unbelievably hot? For looking at me like…like…

And that was when I realized.

He didn't just look angry with me. He looked murderous. As if he wanted to…to _kill_ me.

But what the hell did _I_ do?

"Kelly!"

I flinched as Cammie snapped her fingers in front of my face. "What?"

"Earth to Kel. What's wrong with you? You look scared to death!"

"I'm fine. Just a little dizzy is all," I started swaying as I said that, and I felt a pair of hands on either side of my shoulders.

I jumped and spun around, expecting to look into those fiery eyes, but a pair of dark brown ones were there instead.

"Hey, you okay?" Kevin asked. "Lex told me to tell you guys that our dad is here, so get your shoes on."

I tried thinking up a witty reply to that, since that's my natural instinct with Kevin, but the fog around my brain wouldn't let me. All I could do was nod distractedly.

When I looked around the room for the stranger, he was gone.

* * *

Five minutes and various shoe mix-ups later, we were on our way to meet Lex and Kevin's dad, who was going to be waiting at the subway station.

We were all walking in silence, until Kevin started another all out snowball fight. It was all fun and silly until one of his snowballs hit me in the eye. You wouldn't expect it to hurt that much, but that's where you're wrong. It stung a whole lot, and I couldn't open that eye for about three minutes. When I did, it stung even more. Lex, being the mother hen that she is, coaxed me to open it just a little bit so she could inspect it.

"Oh jeez, it's really red," she frowned.

"I'm sorry, Kelly, I'm really sorry. I'm soooo sorry," Kevin's apologies were a constant background music. Well, more like background noise.

"It's fine," I snapped. I knew it was just an accident but I was really annoyed.

Kevin shut up and looked down, which instantly made me feel super guilty for yelling at him. It really wasn't his fault. Cammie looked at her watch.

"Guys, it's eleven thirty and we were supposed to meet Lex's dad 5 minutes ago. Should we call him?"

After a few mumbled agreements, we were finally ready to move on but I slapped my hand to my forehead. "CRAP!"

Startled, everyone turned to look at me. "What is it?"

"I left my bus card in the locker room," I groaned. "I have to go back and get it."

Lex immediately dismissed the idea. "Kelly, it's okay. You can borrow mine."

I shook my head. "No, you don't understand, my mom lent it to me and it's got forty bucks in it. She'd kill me."

Lex sighed, "Fine. Kev, you go with Cammie and wait with dad. I'll go with Kelly."

"No, you go with them. I feel bad about this as it is. I can go by myself. There'll still be people at the rink."

"You've got to be kidding. You can barely see, and you want to travel through the darkest parts of Central Park, alone, at eleven thirty—" she broke off, glancing at her watch. "—five, where you could get freaking raped or kidnapped or BOTH?"

"Well you make it sound bad," I mumbled. "But yes, that's exactly what I'm going to do, and we're just wasting more time here arguing so I'm gonna go, and you should go to your dad and tell him I'll be back in ten minutes tops. Then we'll all go along our merry way. See you guys in ten."

I started walking in the other direction before anyone could protest, but tripped on an irregular pile of snow. Lex was right, I could only see through my good eye, since my other one was still swollen. I looked behind me to find that Lex was exactly where I had left her. Arms crossed and a frown on her face. I waved, but she just shook her head and caught up with Kevin and Cammie reluctantly. I had to smile at that. She was so motherly. Lex had been my best friend since third grade when I fell off one of the playground equipment and scraped my knee. She had insisted on bringing me to the bathroom first to clean the cut and by the time she was done, all the nurse had to do was give me a band aid. Since then, Lex and I have been inseparable and Kevin was like the brother I never had. Albeit the most annoying creature on the planet.

Thinking this, I dragged my feet through the snow, which was still falling so there was even more now than three hours ago. Snow was getting into my rain boots and making me stumble every so often.

Something in the air shifted. I don't know what it was, but I was getting paranoid. I kept glancing behind me in the shadow of the trees. Suddenly it dawned on me that I was being a complete idiot. I should have let Lex come with me. My mom was always telling to never go anywhere alone at night, why didn't I listen?

"I am so stupid!" I muttered and started to pick up the pace as various gruesome scenarios popped into my head.

I had one hand covering my swollen eye, the other hand tucked into my coat pocket and clutching my cell phone, when a flash of blonde hair caught my – functional – eye.

"Is anyone there?" My voice sounded small and pitiful. I cringed at myself.

Deciding it was nothing, I walk on, even faster than before. I could already see the lights and hear the music of the ice-skating rink. There was only one thought running through my head.

"_Please don't rape me, please don't rape me."_

A thought came to me then. Cammie had blonde hair.

I was so relieved that I actually laughed out loud. "Cammie, come out right now. You scared the crap out of me!" Obviously Lex had sent Cammie over here to scare me. Teach me a lesson. No wait, Lex wasn't like that. It was probably Kevin. He was the prankster.

"Cammie get out here," I laughed.

No one was emerging from the shadows so my relieved laughter was quickly turning into nervous laughter.

"Cammie?"

Finally someone did step out.

But it wasn't Cammie.

* * *

**Hey you - whoever you may be. Thanks so much for taking the time to read this. Don't worry, the Cullens show up within the next few chapters. ;) **

**Won't you be so kind as to review?**


	2. Burn

**2. Burn**

The pain woke me up.

Something…something happened. I couldn't quite recall what at the moment since my attention was focused on the throbbing in my entire body. I tried opening my eyes to see what was causing the throbbing but I couldn't. Did the swollen eye spread to the other one? Could swollen eyes even _do _that? Then I realized I couldn't see anything because there was some sort of blindfold on me. And my arms were tied at the wrist behind my back. Odd.

The pain was too much. Only it wasn't coming from anywhere near my eyes. It burned its way through my veins, near my heart. I wanted to die. Really, truly wanted to die. As I lay there, fists clenched behind me, I thought of all the ways I could end myself and this torture.

In the middle of my morbid thoughts, I suddenly felt a spot in my chest warm up. The spot was smack dab where my heart was. At first it was nice. It almost distracted me from the heat in my arms and legs, but then the welcoming warmth became uncomfortable warmth, and the uncomfortable warmth started to feel like a blazing inferno. I squeezed my eyes shut and clenched my teeth as tightly as possible to keep from screaming. Even if I'd tried to scream, I wouldn't have been able to, due to the sock I had in my mouth. I didn't know how it got there, and believe me, I'm not one to randomly shove socks in anyone's mouth, let alone mine.

It went on forever, this agony. I couldn't move, I couldn't scream for help, I couldn't see anything. The fire in my heart was getting much, much hotter.

This. Is. Unbearable.

My fingers twitched, as if they yearned to tear out my heart. And even though I knew that wasn't humanly possible, I clenched them even tighter, just in case. Suddenly I heard the sound of light snoring—

Oh!

My hands and feet were free! The fire extinguished! _Freedom_, I thought joyously. But that joy was short-lived. As my limbs slowly started to cool, my heart rapidly started to heat up _even more._ Its beating was so fast, so loud that I was sure the snoring guy would be woken up. But no, he was just as peaceful as ever. I envied him. While he was sleeping blissfully somewhere, I was in this dark place writhing in absolute pain. My heart, oh jeez, my heart. It could practically be a contender in the Olympics, it was going so fast. Then it stopped. Everything stopped. The pain, the beating of my heart.

Of course there were the typical New York sounds. Cars honking, ambulances wailing, people chatting, subway trains rumbling underneath. But the absence of my pulse, that's what unnerved me.

After a little wriggling of my hands, I got them out of their restraint. The material was soft. I reached up to the thing covering my eyes and pulled it off.

_Whoa_.

It felt like I was looking at everything through a telescope. A night vision telescope. I could tell I was in a cave of some sort. I could even make out all the little nooks and crannies. In fact, there was a piece of gum wedged in between two pieces of rock to my right. It was as if I had a permanent light within my retina, I could even tell the cave was made out of a grayish, yellowish type of cobblestone. I stayed there, on my stomach for a while. Then I realized the sock was still lodged in my mouth. I meant to take it out slowly, not wanting bits of it to be stuck to my dry mouth, but by the time I finished making the decision to retrieve the sock, my arm had moved on its own accord and it was already in my hand.

On the ground were two scarves. What the… someone had tied me up with them. One was mine, purple and blue wool, but the other was unfamiliar to me. I decided to leave it.

I took a breath to clear my mind but it felt…off. Something wasn't right. I held my breath again. After three hundred and twenty seconds, I still didn't feel the need to breathe. This was too weird. My heart wasn't beating, I didn't need to breathe, and my eyes could penetrate the darkness like nobody's business. What was going on?

Now I was uncomfortably aware of how absolutely parched I was. I smelled water a few feet away from me (wait, I could smell water?) but the scent repelled me. What had once been the most satisfying answer to thirst now seemed the most odious.

I wondered how much more of this strangeness I could take. I started crawling toward the water. Odious or not, I needed liquid. Looking up again, I saw that the cave wasn't a cave at all. It was actually one of those small arches you see under cobblestone bridges. Only it was lower and narrower. So low that if I tried to sit up, I would bump my head, and so narrow that I couldn't even stretch my arms and legs all the way out. I was nearing a little muddy pond, when there was a loud _thwack _coming from the direction of the snorer, who woke with a start.

"What the hell, man?" This was said by a raspy voice with a very distinct accent about twelve feet to my right. I peeked out from under the arch to see two guys. The complete opposites of each other. One was a grubby homeless man rubbing the top of his balding head, and the other, a very clean cut businessman with a very heavy-looking finance magazine, rolled up. The source of the thwacking, I figured.

"This is Central Park, buddy, not a homeless shelter. Sleep somewhere where you won't be an eyesore," said the businessman.

"Where do you suggest I sleep?" The homeless guy asked, tacking on a very insulting word at the end.

"Anywhere. As long as I don't have to see your rotten face."

What a jerk. I found myself tuning them out, turning my head away from them. I continued my short journey to the pond.

At the pond's edge, I peered down into the water. It was too murky to be able to see a reflection, and that added to my unease. Is dirty water better than no water? In the end I didn't drink it, because just the idea of it made me gag. I found myself craving something else. What was it?

_Blood. _A voice in the back of my head informed me.

Blood? Ew! Except… Except that it _wasn't_ disgusting. It actually sounded appetizing. Really appetizing.

Before I had time to really think about it, an image flashed through my head.

_A man. In his forties, it seemed like. He was wearing jeans, a black shirt and a tan leather jacket that was unzipped. He looked familiar, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. He was at a graveyard, kneeling before a headstone. It read, "Here lies Katherine Jane Lauder. Beloved friend, wife, mother, daughter, and sister. 1966 – 2009". The man was in tears, sobbing big, heaving sobs. He briefly opened his eyes, a shockingly bright blue, and mouthed something to the stone, something that looked along the lines of "Forgive me." I couldn't take it. I had to look away from the emotional mess of the man. That's when I noticed a boy, around the age of 10, standing behind the man. For a split second, I saw he had the same eyes as the man. For a split second, before he shut them tight again. Crying silently, frowning._

I lay there, shaken. The anguish was clear on both the man and the boy's faces. The blue eyes of the man were so…defeated. It was scary. Obviously, they were father and son, grieving for someone. The boy's mother? The man's wife? My heart was absolutely broken, aching for them. Why had the man looked so familiar? It was unsettling…

"You heartless jerk! You WILL pay for this!" The homeless guy's voice jerked my attention back to the present.

Peeking out from the arch again, I got a glimpse of the hobo as he jumped over the bench he was apparently sleeping on when he was so rudely awakened. The business man sighed and shook his head. He sat on the bench and pulled out a small, shiny device and started pushing some buttons. He was quite a distance away, but I saw that it was his BlackBerry.

Suddenly the wind that had been relentlessly howling through the night, blew my way. Although I knew the chilly January air should've made me shiver, I wasn't even bothered by it. That fact made even weirder when I noticed I wasn't wearing my coat anymore. Just my purple sweater and scarf that I'd re-wrapped around myself. The blue beanie my sister had given me my last birthday was inexplicably gone. I looked around me but couldn't find it anywhere. I felt a twinge of guilt and sadness. I loved that hat. It was a reminder of my sister, on the other side of the country at college. Another gush of air flew past. Along with this wind came a delicious smell. How could I have missed this before? It would have knocked me off my feet if I'd _been _on my feet. My mouth flowed with what I thought was saliva but didn't taste like it. It was too acidic. Before I had time to think, my instincts told me to get out of the hole and follow the smell. I did.

Right to the business man.

Holy damn, my speed. I was on the track team, so I'd always been able to run fast, but this…_this _was a whole different league. I locked my gaze on the business man and crouched. A deep guttural noise came from my throat. I briefly saw him turn, startled and terrified. His eyes, a ridiculous blue, were wide.

Wait. Blue eyes…

Even though my heart was screaming at me to stop, my brain and thirst urged me on, on, on until I was at the man's neck, biting in the tender flesh and sucking eagerly. The blood soothed me instantly. The warmth reached down to my toes and my fingertips, making me feel giddy. When the man was drained, I let him crumple down to the ground and took my first good look at him. And froze.

_This is him,_ I thought. _This is the man from the graveyard._

Horror gripped and paralyzed me.

I'd just killed a man. A successful one judging from the way he was dressed, and the Blackberry on the ground next to him. He had a son. A young boy who was now orphaned because of me.

Crap.


	3. Realization

**3. Realization**

I gaped at the lifeless body in front of me.

How was it possible that I saw him at that cemetery? I'd never even been to a cemetery my entire life!

The businessman lay there, crumpled and drained of colour. Because of me. Because I was thirsty for _blood. _I wrinkled my nose at the word, like a foul smell.

Slowly – or at least, I meant to do it slowly, but lately everything I did seemed to be on fast forward – I crouched down next to the man, and picked up his Blackberry. The time was stated at the top right corner of the screen; three in the morning. I would have thought it was the same day except the snow on the ground looked dirtier than fresh snow should. So I tried looking for the calendar. I'd never used a Blackberry before so it took a few tries before I found it, and was immediately horrified that it was January thirteenth. Three days after the ice-skating party.

Where were the others? Lex and Cammie and Kevin? Were they look for me? How was I even down in that hole for three days? A million and two questions soared through my mind at that moment; none of which had an answer. I was becoming increasingly agitated and began pacing before a single thought instantly made me stop short.

My parents.

What were they doing right now? How did Lex and Kevin's dad tell them I was missing?

I had to find out. With determination my dominant emotion, well, that and confusion, I put the Blackberry into my back pocket and gave the businessman one last apologetic glance before sprinting off into the trees.

Running all out like this was amazing to me. The lights of Manhattan zipped by, all blurring together. A few things were off, though. For instance, my heart wasn't pumping hard like how it does when I'm usually running, but then again, it wasn't beating at all. My feet didn't seem to touch the ground. Not once. I got the sensation of running on one of those flat escalators. The ones you usually find in airports. And lastly, my breathing was absolutely normal. Not heavy and strained at all.

When I reached my street on Second Avenue, it was strangely deserted. Usually it was super busy, no matter what the time. There were always the sounds of horns honking, tires squealing, and drunken people yelling. I stared up at my apartment building. I realized that I didn't have my keys. They were in the pocket of my coat, along with my cell phone. I swore mentally. I peered into the lobby of the apartment. The doorman wasn't at the door but I could see there was a guy at the front desk. I was about to walk in when a figure emerged from the alley way next to the building.

"Hey, beautiful," it slurred lazily. "What's a girl like you doin' here at this time of night?"

I wrinkled my nose in disgust and automatically took a step back. He was just one of those gross bottom feeders who hit on girls on the street. I'd first gotten hit on by one of them when I was _thirteen_. Now, five years later these guys were still utterly revolting, with nothing better to do.

"Hey c'mon, don't be like that, girly. Come on over here. Let's talk."

Ignoring him, I started toward the steps into my apartment. I almost got away too, but then the wind had to do it again. It blew my way and the scent of the scum filled my senses against my will. The guy was gross, but his blood smelled…delicious.

My brain made the decision quickly. I turned my body toward the man and smiled. He suddenly took a step back, looking a little scared. That was strange. He looked to be in thirties. Why would he be scared of an eighteen-year-old girl? He almost looked as if he was going to run the other direction but at the last minute, took a few steps nearer to me. And farther from the darkness of the alley. No way was I going to do it in the open so I walked past him deeper into the alley. Now the guy looked excited. He probably thought he was getting lucky tonight. Quite the opposite.

"What's your name, girly?" he drawled.

"Kelly," I purred. This was the first time I had said anything out loud since I woke up and I was surprised by how... seductive my voice sounded. "What's yours?"

"Carl," Carl smiled sickeningly as he _slithered_ closer to me. Now he was looking at me closely, from my feet all the way up to my face. There he stopped at gasped.

"Whoa, those are some freaky contact lenses you're wearing," he mumbled.

Before I could make sense of what he was saying, another image filled my head.

_It was Carl. He was in this very same alley, talking to another girl. She looked so young. About fifteen or sixteen, and terrified out of her mind. Carl had her backed up into a corner and was licking his lips slowly, looking incredibly...ugh. _

"_C'mon girly, I won't hurt you. Much," he added, his eyes raking her body. Up and down. "Hmm, you are _so_ pretty."_

The rest was too horrible, I can't even repeat it. My stomach clenched tightly, uncomfortably. I wish I had never seen that. I thought murderous thoughts against Carl. A deep, frightening noise made itself known in the back of my throat and I was on top of him, teeth in his neck, his blood flooding down my throat. After a while, I straightened up and wiped my mouth with the sleeve of my sweater. Then my eyes widened as it hit me. I had killed two people in less than an hour. Even though Carl was despicable and deserved it, I couldn't get past the fact that I was now a murderer. I started hyperventilating, unnecessary air filling my empty lungs.

With a weight as crushing as the world, I realized I couldn't go back to my parents. Not like this. I couldn't risk hurting them. Whatever monster I had turned into, I couldn't let them suffer for it. I felt as if my heart was being ripped out slowly, artery by artery. The people I loved most in the world… I could never see them again for fear I would lose control and do to them what I'd done to Carl and the poor businessman.

I leaned against the alley wall and slid down till I was sitting, hugging my knees to myself. My chest started heaving as I sobbed. Strangely, my eyes stayed dry.

* * *

I stayed in that alley for three hours, thinking. Until the sky turned from a dark gray to a light purple. I looked over at Carl's motionless form and wondered how long it would be before someone discovered his body.

After I grudgingly and sadly accepted that staying away from my parents would be the best thing for everyone, logic took over my brain and left no room for feelings. So I dragged Carl (with surprising ease) to the darkest corners of the alley and covered his body with old newspapers. I was still so revolted by him. He deserved more than death. He deserved to be tortured. Torn apart –

_Stop._ I told myself. _Stop these awful thoughts, they're not like you._

When I was finished hiding the guy, I went back to my spot on the alley floor. I started thinking, listing the things that had changed since I woke up. First of all, I had no heartbeat. Second, I could hold my breath for as long as I wanted, whereas three days ago, the longest I could hold it in was a mere minute. Third, my senses were unbelievably fantastic. I could see perfectly, even in the pitch black alley. I heard whole conversations coming from the nightclubs and bars that I knew were a good five blocks away. I could smell _water _and the food from the 24-hour diner across the street. I had incredible speed, incredible strength (Carl looked like he weighed about 180 pounds but he was as light as a feather), and the most disturbing of all: I craved blood. Nonstop. Whatever I thought about, there was always a voice coming from the back of my head reminding me of the nagging, ever-present burning in my throat.

I rubbed my temples, even though I didn't have a headache. A vibration made me ram rod straight, eyes and ears alert for any sign of danger. Turns out it was just the Blackberry in my pocket. I pulled it out and read the caller ID.

_Walter._

When I didn't pick up, Walter left a voice message. I put the phone next to my ear to listen, and then wish I hadn't.

"Um, hi Dad, it's Walter." It was the sound of a young boy. Could it be the one I saw in that vision? Oh, god. "Where are you? I woke up this morning and you weren't here. Come home soon, okay? I need to be in school by eight. Bye, love you."

A ball of guilt was forming in my throat. I tried to swallow it. As if I didn't feel horrible enough. This poor boy was waiting for a father who would never come home.

The phone rang again a few minutes later and Walter's name popped up. He left another voicemail. Feeling awful, I threw the BlackBerry into the opposite wall. It broke in half and the screen went black. I buried my head in my hands. After a while, I pulled back and noticed for the first time that my arms were white. As pale as pale could be. This didn't make sense. Just three days ago, I was really tan from winter vacation in Florida with my family.

This final piece of information gave me a theory. But it was a ridiculous theory. Crazy, far-fetched, delusional. But I thought. What if I _was _what I thought I was? It would mean I couldn't walk around in the sunlight anymore, that my diet would consist of only human blood, that I couldn't smile without sending someone running. Wait, did I even have those? I ran my tongue along my teeth. No fangs, but I definitely do not remember my teeth being that sharp the last time I checked. I stood up with lightning speed and started running, in which direction, I don't know. I just knew that I had to find shelter before the sky became even lighter. The alley would have no hiding places in it once the sun was up.

The sun was just beginning to become visible, peeking out over the top of the many skyscrapers that littered the city's skyline. This street was so familiar to me; I didn't even have to look where I was going. A display of video cameras in the window of an electronics store caught my eye. Next to the cameras were flat screen TVs that showed the footage being filmed by the cameras of passersby. I backtracked so I could look at myself on the TV.

The girl on the screen looked so different from what I knew I looked like that for a while I wondered if it was even filming me, or if the image on the TV was pre-recorded. To test it out, I raised my right hand and touched my head. The girl did the same thing. I felt my jaw drop. The girl looked startled and disbelieving.

"No way," I whispered. The girl's pink lips echoed my words exactly.

I could barely organize my scrambled thoughts. The pretty girl on the screen was waiting patiently for me to stop being such a dork. The girl's – I should stop saying that. After all, the girl was _me. _My ink black hair flowed down until it stopped just under my shoulder blades. My eyes traveled back up to my face. It was round-ish, like always, but considerably paler. Then I noticed—

Holy…

My _eyes. _I had to blink several times to make sure I wasn't just hallucinating. Sure enough, though, they stayed the same. Blood red. Not the usual dark green I was used to. My mind reeled. Why did this look so familiar? I didn't have to wrack my brain for long before I found an answer. The handsome stranger from the ice rink. He had almost the exact eye color that I was staring into now. Though his had more orange in them and mine were the most aggressive shade of crimson you could ever imagine.

Now that I had started thinking about him, I couldn't stop. I had temporarily forgotten what had happened prior to me being incapacitated by the fire but now it all came rushing back.

The stranger. He did this.

* * *

**Review pleeeease. :)**


	4. Melted Butter

**I'd like to dedicate this chapter to Duck Life, who encouraged me to keep going. And also to Ed-and-Jane. Thanks, guys. :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, but I own Kelly and that's good enough for me. :P**

* * *

**4. Melted Butter**

The cluster of buildings loomed up before me. The medical center owned by NYU. It seemed almost entirely made of glass, there were so many windows but of course it wasn't. That wouldn't exactly be safe for the patients now would it? The purple circle that was its logo appeared sad for some reason. Maybe it was the lack of sun, I don't know, but it depressed me. Even more than I already was.

Winter in New York meant minimal sunlight. Which I suppose, is good for me. As soon as it became clear the sun would not be making an appearance any time soon, I began wandering. I tried avoiding heavily populated areas (almost an impossibility in this city) so as to no be tempted by anyone's blood. But I guess it was too much to ask for. Everywhere I went, people stared, people tried to talk to me, some people even followed me wherever I went - easily fixed when I flashed my teeth at them. They would not leave me alone! One man offered me his coat - I was still just wearing my thin hoodie and jeans from the skating night, almost a week ago - but when I put it on I was so immediately overwhelmed by his scent that I threw it back at him and ran away. Since then I had been holding my breath and only traveled near walls and dark corners so no one would see my eyes, the irises of which, had not toned down in redness. I was becoming weak though, and tired. Not in the physical sense, but mentally. I wanted to slip into my PJs and bury myself within the warmth of my bed. Even if I didn't feel the need to sleep anymore, I wanted to. Sleeping was my favorite pastime. It helped me escape from a bad day. A bad week. I was having a bad week, the dryness in my throat etching itself into each and every one of my thoughts. That's why I was at the hospital. Maybe, just maybe, I could sneak by and grab myself a couple of blood bags. Then, I could fulfill my needs without having another murder on my hands. Right? By now, I had accepted that I was no longer human. However, that did not mean I wanted to accept what I _had _become. Instead, I just called myself 'monster'.

This is so unfair!

All my life I'd been the nice girl everyone could count on, and I didn't mind that one bit. I liked it. Having so many friends who trusted you and who you could trust right back. Other than paper cuts, I hated any sort of blood-inducing wound and now blood is all I think about. This all sucks, no pun intended.

Earlier in the day, I had walked casually by a guy selling knock-off sunglasses and easily scooped up a pair. I wore these now, covering my eyes and most of my face. These shades were huge! I felt like Paris Hilton. I could see all sorts of people milling about in the hospital lobby. Mostly medical students and sick people. Most of them looked normal, but it was strange. It's as if I could _smell _their sickness. Which, when you think about it, is really gross.

_A little girl tears open a glitter-clad present. Inside is a pair of socks. The girl's face falls and tears well up in her eyes. "I HATE YOU!" she screams at her parents. Later that day she finally realizes that they had hidden a pair of diamond earrings in each sock. By the time she goes to apologize to them they were already on their way to a friends' house. On their way there, a semi truck collides into them and they die on impact._

...

_A man and a woman are sitting on a bench. The man gets down on his knees and proposes. The woman is overjoyed. They get married, have kids, grandkids. Now the woman is on a hospital bed, tubes sticking out of her from any possible surface. The line on the monitor goes flat and the man breaks down. He's holding on to her hand so tightly._

...

The memories run through my mind, appearing and disappearing quickly. They're not my memories of course; they're the memories of the people around me. I found out what these images were when I went to visit Lex.

The third night after I woke up I went to her house, scaled the side of the building until I reached the thirty-first floor. Heights still scared me, but I was no longer afraid of falling. I knew my... skills... would prevent that. When I reached Lex's floor, I punched through a window easily. The glass didn't even leave a scratch on my hand. The corridor was long and dark. Even so, I could see the door to her apartment from far away. I remembered Lex telling me that they had buried a spare key in one of the many plants in front of the door. Crouching down, I sniffed each plant. There. The metallic smell was coming off of the pot in the corner. Key in hand, I quietly slid it into the keyhole and pushed the door open ever so slowly. The entire place was dark. Everyone was asleep. Not a surprise since it _was _two in the morning. My feet automatically guided me to Lex's room. I opened her door a crack. She was on her side, back facing toward me. The wave of memories coming off of her was almost as staggering as the smell of her blood cloaking the room. I quickly stopped breathing and paid attention only to the pictures she was painting in my head.

_We were lounging around my living room, waiting on the brownies in the oven. Lex eventually dozed off, the magazine she was reading fell to the floor beside me. I picked it up and flipped through it. I dozed off too. Next thing I knew the house was looking cloudy on the inside though outside the sky was clear. "The brownies!" I shouted, simultaneously waking Lex. We rushed to the kitchen. As soon as I opened the oven, puffs of smoke enveloped the whole room. By the time my parents came home we had tried opening all the windows yet the smoke clung to everything. After my parents gave Lex and I a lecture they made us eat some of the gross, dried out would-be brownies. After we got over how much the brownies resembled saw-dust in taste and texture we couldn't stop laughing about our flakiness._

It was only then that I realized the images I was seeing were memories. I barely had time to think about it when Lex had another flashback.

_She was lying in bed, her face was covered by the pillow but by the way her shoulders were shaking it was clear that Lex was crying. Suddenly her phone rang, causing her head to snap up and look at it. The caller ID showed that it was me calling. Lex ignored my call. But I called again. And again. And again until she finally picked up._

_"What?" she snapped uncharacteristically. _

_"Lex? What's wrong? I didn't see you after school. Cammie said the last time she saw you was fifth period. Did you skip?"_

_There was a brief pause before Lex abruptly burst into a fresh round of tears. "Liam broke up with me!" she wailed._

I remembered this. After Lex had told me that, I immediately hung up and was out the door in less than a minute.

_The doorbell rang and Lex grudgingly went over to answer it. I stepped through the door the minute it opened and hugged Lex, letting her sob on my shoulder. I slept over that night and listened to her rant about Liam, cursing him, missing him, berating him, then berating herself briefly before I told her to cut it out. She did nothing wrong._

This memory was filled with the faint pain of losing Liam - faint, because she was over him - but accompanied by the larger, more unbearable pain at losing a best friend. Right at this moment, Lex was remembering a dream she had a few years earlier. It was one where she was at a funeral for all the people she loved. The gravestones with her loved ones' names stretching in every which way. My name among them. Now I knew. Lex thought I was dead.

For the millionth time since I first saw the businessman's memory, my heart ached. It twisted and turned in odd directions and caused me so much grief I didn't know how I was still alive.

I stayed a moment longer. Long enough to discover that Lex hadn't gone to school this whole week. That she'd stayed in bed, only leaving to go to the bathroom. I wanted to wake her up. To tell her I was all right, that I was alive. But I couldn't do it. For the same reason I couldn't see my parents. I didn't want to lose control. I didn't want to kill her. So, after whispering a quiet goodbye, I left her room, left her house. And here I was, standing outside of a hospital a week later. Reliving the painful flashbacks of everyone who was in some way connected to this place, or the people in it.

Gathering up my courage, I squared my shoulders and started walking towards the automatic doors of the hospital.

The lady at the desk had her head bent over some files. Everything about her was scattered. Her expression, her hair, the whole desk where she no doubt manned most of the time.

"Excuse me?" I asked, trying to sound as sweet and innocent as possible.

"Yes, hon?" Despite her appearance, the voice that addressed me was patient and warm.

"Um, I was wondering... I mean, my cousin is here. I want to visit her."

"Sure, what's her name?"

I took advantage of my eyes and peeked over at a file a doctor was holding ten feet away from me.

"Kathy Gorde."

The nurse went back to flipping through the papers on her desk. "Ah, here we are. Gorde comma Kathy. Room Eight."

I arranged my features into a grateful one even though on the inside I was surprised they didn't ask any further questions.

Everything here was white. Sterile. The long, clean hallways made my pale skin crawl. I snorted. I thought monsters were fearless.

The door to my right was marked 'Storage'. I had no idea if they stored donated blood there but I figured I would just check.

No luck.

Each promising door was a dud. Nothing but bandages and scrubs and first aid kits and things I didn't even have a name for. I sighed.

_I should probably get out of here_, I thought_. Before the smell of blood pushes me to the edge._

Just then I heard someone gasp. I turned to see two men in white lab coats. No, not men. _Gods. _They were beautiful. Stunning. I felt my jaw drop. They were about the same height, though one looked older. Both had ghostly pale skin and their eyes were the color of melted butter. The older one had very pale blonde hair. His face was kind and instantly made me feel at ease. The younger man, although he didn't look exactly _un_kind, his face was more severe. Pensive. He made me wary and self-conscious. My eyes traveled up his head and settled on his hair. It almost made me laugh, it was so odd. I'd never seen bronze-colored hair before.

The blonde doctor took a step toward me. "Sunglasses indoors. Is that what the kids are doing now?" he laughed light-heartedly. "Would you mind taking those off, dear?"

I just stood there, thinking how I didn't want to deal with their reactions if they saw my eyes. My blood red eyes.

Bronze-head put a hand on Mr. Blonde's arm and muttered something under his breath. I'm sure if I had not been turned into a... you-know-what, I wouldn't have been able to make out the words, but I heard them. I heard them clear as day.

"Carlisle. She's a newborn."

**

* * *

**

**Hope that leaves you wanting more. xP Don't forget to review!**


	5. Bloodsuckers

**Hi guys, sorry this took longer than my other chapters to upload. I'm moving soon and I've been busy packing. Anywho, enjoy the chapter and r-e-v-i-e-w! :D**

**Disclaimer: Twilight is by Stephenie Meyer, not me.**

* * *

**5. Blood-suckers**

It all became a little too much for me. The extremely good-looking men, the sterile emptiness of the hospital, the smell of sickness and human blood wafting through the air, and most unbearable of all, the heartbreaking memories of everyone around me.

So I bolted.

I turned on my heel and started running. Not even noticing that I had broken the automatic doors until I heard someone say "She broke the automatic doors!"

The footsteps behind me were as light as my own. Risking a glance behind, I could see it was Bronze-head and Mr. Blonde. What was his name? Carlisle? I didn't care. All I cared about was getting away from them, getting away from everything. Maybe, somehow I could run so fast that time would turn backwards and everything could be normal again. _What a stupid thought, Kelly, _I scolded myself. Stupid or not I demanded that my feet go faster. It seemed I wouldn't be losing my pursuers anytime soon but I had to try. The oversized sunglasses were bumping against my nose with each step I took, and irritating me to no end so I threw it behind me, hoping it would hit one of them in the face.

"Kelly! Please stop!" the voice of Bronze-head reached me easily, as if he were no more than a few inches behind me.

My steps faltered. How did he know my name?

The slight hesitation was all it took for them to catch hold of each of my arms. Their warm fingers were gentle, and obviously meant me no harm, but I still struggled, trying to escape. I almost succeeded but then the blonde one, Carlisle started talking to me.

"Please, we're not going to hurt you. My name is Carlisle Cullen and this is my son, Edward."

Son? Carlisle looked to be only in his early twenties. He couldn't have a teenage son.

"Well," said Edward. "I'm not his biological son. It's a long story. One we could explain in detail if you promise not to run away from us."

A long pause, while I deliberated.

"Okay," I whispered finally. They let me go.

"Yes, she is," the one named Edward replied some unspoken question.

_They were in a field. Carlisle and Edward, and many more. Each and every one was stunningly gorgeous. Eight of them all had the same pale skin, but only seven had that buttery eye color. The odd one out, a pretty girl who looked around my age, had brown eyes. She was tucked into Edward's side. Everyone was staring at something in front of them. No, not something. Someone. A young girl with the same red eyes that I had. She was writhing around on the ground, grabbing at the dirt beneath her. "But I _want _her," she cried. Absolute agony in her eyes._

My hand flew up to my mouth. What was _that_? Were Carlisle and Edward and all those other people torturing that poor girl? One glance at Carlisle told me no. He just radiated kindness. But she looked like she was in so much pain.

"Was that- Did you... Did you just-" Edward was gaping at me.

"Edward, what is it?" Carlisle asked him.

Edward seemed to be almost in a trance. "She just looked at my memory of Bree." Then to me "How did you do that, Kelly?"

"How do you know my name?" I hissed, and took a step back.

Carlisle smiled apologetically at me. "Right. We should tell you a little bit about ourselves."

* * *

It took them two hours to explain themselves to me. Apparently they were vampires - I cringed at the word, finally hearing it out loud - that only drank animal blood. The animal blood was what made their eyes so warm and golden instead of the hostile crimson that I had. They told me that's how I could distinguish between traditional vamp-... blood-suckers and "vegetarian" ones. Carlisle was over 300 years old and had grown immune to the smell of human blood, that's why he could work as a doctor so easily. Edward could read minds. That's how he first found out that I was also... one of them_. _Edward could "hear" me thinking about blood and about my eyes and he picked up my name while I was scolding myself for being stupid.

They lived in Forks, Washington with the rest of their "family". There were nine of them in total. Carlisle, Edward, Esme, Bella, Renesmee, Jasper, Alice, Emmett and Rosalie. Honestly, there were so many names that I didn't even bother trying to memorize them, but their faces were mesmerizing. The brown-eyed girl I saw in Edward's mind earlier, was his wife. She was human at the time of the memory but they had turned her only a year ago. Five of them had special "abilities". Mind-reading, future-seeing, emotion-manipulating, power-blocking (a.k.a. a "shield"), and one that didn't really have a name but they called it "thought-transferring".

Renesmee, an angelic-looking child with Edward's bronze hair and Bella's human eyes was their daughter. When Carlisle explained how this was possible, Edward had a flashback of him and Bella on a white bed. Feathers everywhere. Both me and him coughed awkwardly and I scooted a little farther away. Carlisle seemed to guess what had happened and laughed quietly. To change the subject I asked them what they were doing in New York.

"Carlisle is a very well-respected doctor and the teachers at NYU medical center wanted him to give some lectures at a seminar," Edward explained. If it were possible, I knew his face would've been the color of my eyes. "I'm just here so he has a hunting buddy."

_Edward and his wife are at the door of an adorable little cottage saying goodbye, hugging each other like they never want to let go. _

_"Be safe," she told him, a small smile playing on her lips. _

_Edward laughed quietly, remembering a note he had left for her when she was still human. "I will, love."_

_In the car, he kept eye contact with her in the rearview mirror until she was a tiny speck in the distance._

Edward had looked a little embarrassed when I saw that, and I felt guiltier than when I saw him and Bella…elsewhere. This moment was more personal somehow and I felt as if I'd intruded. And I had. But he reassured me. "It's all right, I understand. I invade peoples' privacy all the time."

Carlisle went on explaining about how each of them was turned into a v-. Into a _that. _I still had trouble saying the actual word. He had bitten Edward, then Esme, then Rosalie. Emmett was saved by Rosalie from death by grizzly bear, and then turned by Carlisle, since he had the most restraint out of all of them. Jasper and Alice came together from somewhere else because Alice had a vision about being part of the Cullen family. Edward met Bella when she moved from Arizona. She was what they called his "singer". Meaning her blood was more alluring to him than any other human's blood was. Finally, after they got married, Edward turned her as well, because she desperately wanted to spend her entire existence with him. I for one, think Bella was being extremely foolish and selfish. How could she just leave her parents? Her friends? I don't understand how someone could _want _to be a blood-sucking savage for the rest of their lives!

"Ahem."

Too late, I remembered that I was criticizing Edward's one true love, and that he could read my mind.

"Sorry," I tell him.

"No worries."

Carlisle looks from me to Edward and back again. "Okay then. Kelly, we've told you all about our family. Could you fill us in on how you became like us?"

I could feel a lump begin to form in my throat and tried to swallow it back down. I could feel them watching me expectantly, on either side of me. We'd been sitting on a bench overlooking a small garden right outside the hospital, with Edward on my right and Carlisle on my left. It was a long bench so we could sit comfortably without touching. I couldn't bring myself to speak just yet, so instead I surveyed the garden. The grass was a dull green and was sparse. You could plainly see a lot of spots where the soil had been stepped on so many times, that nothing grew there anymore. In the middle of it all was a water fountain. There was no water running since it was winter, and it would just freeze anyway. Pigeons of all colors and sizes pecked around the entire garden. Anywhere but near us. I guess animals didn't like what we were.

It had been a while and I could feel Edward start to get restless. Especially because I took special care not to think about the night my life changed.

"Kelly?" came Carlisle's gentle voice. He was prompting me to begin.

So I told them. I started from when I first saw the fire-eyed stranger in the rental building, how Kevin accidentally threw a snowball in my face so I could barely see. How I became extremely paranoid when I was trekking through the snow on my way to get my bus card. I told them about the fire in my body, making me want to die. I told them about the first memory I had that wasn't mine. I had to stop talking a while when explaining that. I still felt so incredibly guilty about the businessman and his orphaned son. Finally I got to talking about Carl and the anger that filled me was so overpowering I almost felt the need to punch something. Kick something. Destroy anything. I had to stop again, to regain my calm. All the while, the angels on either side of me listened patiently.

My voice became quieter as I talked about visiting Lex, and how much I missed my parents. A couple of sobs escaped without my permission. I buried my face in my hands. I could feel Carlisle's hand patting me awkwardly on the back. "There, there" he soothed.

All had become silent so I looked up. Carlisle and Edward were having another one of their silent conversations. Perhaps trying to figure out who it was that turned me. The sky was getting dark - well. Dark_er. _- signifying evening's approach. Great. Every night when I'm not killing innocent businessmen or revisiting people from my past life, I broke into the nearby bookstore and read the whole night. I loved reading, but in five short nights I'd already flipped through just about _every _book available. Oh well. I guess I could reread some.

"Kelly," Edward's voice was disapproving. "Do you really think after meeting you we're just going to let you go?"

"Um," I didn't know how to answer.

"You can't be expected to spend the rest of your life in a bookstore. You'll get thirsty. Thirstier than you are now and-"

Carlisle intervened, seeing as how I flinched at the mention of thirstiness. "You should come back to Forks with us. We can show you how to hunt the animals there. There's not much wild life in this city is there?" he looked over at the pigeons disdainfully.

I was wary of joining such a big and close-knit family. I wouldn't belong.

"We'd welcome you with open arms, you know," Edward looked so sincere. Staring down at me with those eyes. He was remembering how his family had accepted Bella so whole-heartedly when he first brought her home. Well, except for the statuesque blonde female. Rosalie. But Edward explained that was only because she thought Bella was stupid to choose vampirism over humanity. Huh. Already Rosalie and I had something in common. A scowl from Edward caused me to bite my lip guiltily.

"So," began Carlisle. "What do you say? We can start the drive home tonight, and fix you up with some nice, juicy...elk."

He and Edward started laughing, it was such a harmonious, melodic sound that I found myself smiling at them.

"Besides," Edward grinned. "We wouldn't want you to kill any other innocent bystanders, right?"

Oh. Of course. The Cullens didn't want me to go back to Forks with them because they cared whether my thirst was satisfied or not. They only cared what would happen if it wasn't. These vamp- people who suck blood - were only worried that I would annihilate the entire human population when I became crazy with it. Well I would show them. There were plenty of squirrels for me to suck on right here.

"Kelly. Kelly c'mon, you know that's not what I meant." Edward grabbed my hand, preventing me from standing up.

"What's going on? What's she thinking?" asked a baffled Carlisle.

"She thinks we're only bringing her back because she's a blood-crazed monster and that we don't want her anywhere near the human population." He was still holding on to my hand, with both of his now, since I was struggling with all my might to get free.

"Oh, that's not true. We just can't bear the thought of you being all alone in this big city, especially knowing we had the chance to help you."

That's even worse. Pity. They pitied me. I snatched my hand away with such force that I would've toppled over if it were not for my supernatural sense of balance.

For the second time that day I ran away from the Cullens.


	6. Hunting Brussels Sprouts

**Chapter Six! ****This one is the longest yet. Almost 3,300 words. **

**I want to say thank you to everyone who reads this, and an even bigger, ginormous thank you to everyone who reviews. You make my day. :)**

**Also, I re-wrote part of chapter 5. At first I thought I would pretend Renesmee was never born, but then I realized I needed her. Heh, sorry Nessie.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

**(Eh, I know the title of this chapter is pretty lame. Bear with me, it's 5 in the morning.)**

* * *

**6. Hunting Brussels Sprouts**

_Where should I go?_

I was running through a million possibilities in my head. When I decided to leave the vegetarians behind, I didn't quite think ahead as to where I would run to. The bookstore was definitely out. That's the first place they would look for me. Would they even look for me? What did I care? I could survive without them.

There was a warehouse behind that drugstore on Sixth Avenue. Would Edward be able to read my mind still? How far away did I have to be to get away from him? I wondered how his mind-reading worked. Maybe if I went underground, to the subway station, I could lose him, like you lost bars on a cell phone. I shook my head. The subway wasn't a good idea. The foul smell of stale urine, stagnant water and rats was bad enough, but add human blood to the mix and I was in trouble. Then the idea hit me.

Central Park Zoo.

The Blackberry informed me that it was seven o' clock. The zoo would be closed and the animals would be kept indoors. I'd be alone. Why didn't I think of this sooner? I zipped by everyone, everything and in a couple of minutes I was there. I hid in a cave in the Polar Bear enclosure and started thinking. Carlisle and Edward Cullen. They offered to take me under their wing and I refused. I told myself it was the right thing to do. After all, all their family would remind me of was the one I had to abandon. My parents and my sister. A memory seeped into my thoughts and this time it was my own.

_Cammie, Lex and I were walking back to my apartment after watching a movie on my birthday. I decided not to have a party since most of my friends were enjoying their summer vacation in various parts of the world and my sister, Natalie, was still in Seattle, studying law. Why she stayed in school even though everyone else was on holiday was a mystery to me. She _was_ always a workaholic, so maybe that was it. _

_The elevator ride up to my floor was silent. Which was weird. Usually we couldn't stop talking. That's what drove everyone around us nuts at school...and at the movie theater. _

I laughed out loud when I recalled the faces on the other movie-goers that day.

_When we finally reached the door to my apartment, the inside was dark, and no one was home. _

_"Mom? Dad? We're back!" I called. No answer._

_"Maybe they left you to go to the Bahamas," Cammie suggested. "It could happen!" she added after I shot her a look._

_"SURPRISE!" multiple voices shouted and all the lights flickered on. My mom came out and gave me a hug._

_"Happy eighteenth birthday, sweetie," she whispered. I looked up to find that she was a little teary-eyed. _

_Everyone I loved was there. All my friends that I thought were on vacation, my cousins from Boston. My sister. She jumped out from somewhere and tackled me to the ground. "Happy birthday little sister," she laughed. _

_That night was the best one of my life. Plenty of laughter, hugs and kisses, and of course, presents. Mom and Dad gifted me with a new laptop to replace my dinosaur. Natalie gave me her blue beanie. I had wanted it since I was fourteen. _

_"Here," she had said. "While I study my ass off on the other side of the continent, you can wear this and look hot."_

I sighed, and replayed other moments from that night and others, sometimes laughing to myself if they were funny.

A few hours had passed and no sign of the Cullens. For some unfathomable reason, I felt a little hurt. Did they really give up on me that easily? I shook my head to clear it. _I don't care, I don't care, I don't care. _

"Kelly?"

I jumped. The voice that had said my name was one I'd never heard before, but it was familiar. Edward had remembered it while explaining her power. High-pitched and musical, like wind-chimes.

Alice Cullen.

Some weird mixture of happiness and dread flooded me at the sound of her voice. Happiness because the Cullens _hadn't _given up on me, but dread because they hadn't given up on me.

"She's very confusing," said another voice. This one I had trouble placing, but it had a faint southern drawl to it. Jasper?

"What do you mean, Jazz?" said Alice, confirming my suspicion.

"She's got contradicting emotions," Jasper answered.

Suddenly a short figure skipped into the little cave. Even though it was pitch black in here, I saw her perfectly. A little pixie with spiky hair. She seemed very hyper.

"Hi there! My name's Alice. But you knew that." she trilled.

I just stared at her trying to stay as detached as possible, but I had to fight the urge to smile at her. She was just so _happy. _

"Nice scarf," she said, mostly to herself. "Anyway, come on."

Alice reached for my hand and didn't even notice when I cringed against the wall of the cave. She dragged me out of there with strength that didn't seem possible for her petite frame. My breath caught when I saw the honey blonde hair. I froze in place, making Alice turn to peer at me. "Kelly? What's wrong?"

My emotions were all haywire. Shock, recognition, sadness, anger, hatred.

I shifted my gaze to look into his camp-fire eyes. And was broken out of my reverie when I realized this wasn't him. This wasn't the one who changed me. Instead of ruby eyes tinged with orange, I was staring into golden ones.

Jasper furrowed his brow and seemed to be concentrating hard. I didn't have to be a mind reader to know what he was thinking. Why was my reaction to him so chaotic? But it wasn't my reaction to _Jasper. _Just Jasper's hair. Which was the same shade of blonde as... well, I didn't know his name, but I'd recently decided to call him Fire Eyes.

"Um," I probably should apologize to Jasper. "Sorry. I thought you were... someone else."

He just nodded slowly, eyes still trained on me.

Alice raised an eyebrow but immediately went back to being chirpy. "So you _do _talk! Great! Now c'mon, Carlisle and Edward will be expecting us soon."

She started pulling me forward again but I didn't budge.

"Oh right," Alice grumbles. "You're a newborn."

This was the second time I'd heard someone call me that and since Carlisle had explained it to me, I now knew that that meant I was stronger than most vampires (at least for now) and that I'd have less control over my thirst, and my emotions and reactions to things would be completely irrational. As proven by my encounter with Alice's husband.

"I'm not going back with you. With any of you."

Alice sighed. "Well I do see you staying here the rest of eternity but it's blurry which means you're not entirely sure. But you _will_ come. You have to."

"I don't have to do anything," after so much in my life had changed beyond my control, I thought I should be able to decide whether I wanted to stay in New York or not. "I'm not going to Forks."

* * *

"_The city of Forks welcomes you."_

I couldn't believe I was in a place named after cutlery.

After I told Alice I wasn't coming, she turned to Jasper and raised her eyebrows at him. He nodded slightly and then started talking to me.

"Be reasonable, Kelly. What do you think your future would be like here? How would you spend your days?"

And then he went on about how if I moved to Forks with them I could start on a clean slate. A blank canvas. If I ever ran into anyone I knew in New York, I would have a whole lot of explaining to do, but in Forks, no one would know me and I could basically, in his words "start a new life". I'd be able to go to school and not have to hide in alleys and bookstores anymore. I kept my eyes on his shoes the whole time, not being able to control the slight anger that overcame me when I happened to glance at his hair. It was very similar to Fire Eyes. And I hated Fire Eyes. I made a vow to myself that if I ever saw him again I would kill him. A life for a life. Because really, you couldn't call _this _living. When your heartbeat stops you're dead to the world.

"Kelly, are you listening?" Alice's voice sounded a little exasperated. Feeling bad I made a real effort to listen to her. "So, we'll need to get you some new clothes. You can't be wearing that outfit forever. Well actually…I guess you technically can, but you know what I mean. I'm thinking we go to Port Angeles tomorrow when you've settled in a little more. Until then, I've got tons of clothes you can have."

I gaped at her. Was this a joke? She's _seriously _planning a shopping trip? There was so much more to think about… and she was planning a _shopping trip_?

"We can bring Rosalie too. I think you'd like her. Hmm, Bella will take some convincing. She doesn't like to shop much. For anything. It drives me crazy! But Nessie might be able to persuade Bella with that puppy dog face of hers."

I usually liked to shop but that was the last thing on my to-do list since I was turned. I slumped back into the leather seat of Alice's Porsche. I shook my head. Alice had a Porsche, Carlisle had a Mercedes, Edward had a Volvo, and Jasper had recalled Rosalie's convertible and Bella's Ferrari. The Cullens had such an exorbitant amount of money it was a wonder how they didn't drown in it.

"We're almost there," Alice told me. "Jazz?"

"Yeah?" Jasper said from the backseat.

"What's the general mood of the house?"

"I don't know, I keep getting sidetracked by… um, other emotions."

All of us knew he meant me. My depression was pretty tangible.

Alice changed the subject quickly, "Oh, well, all right. I guess we'll have to find out the normal way. Ugh, have I mentioned how much I hate doing things the normal way?"

"Several times," Jasper grinned at her, and she grinned back.

I could see the Mercedes and Volvo parked in the winding driveway leading to a huge white house. No, not house. _Mansion._

My eyes must have bugged out of their sockets because both Alice and Jasper chuckled at me. "You like?" Alice asked. A nod was all I could manage.

When we pulled up to the front of the house a woman with caramel hair opened the door, a warm smile lighting up her face. She instantly made me feel at ease, just as Carlisle had. Next to me, I vaguely noticed Jasper's brow furrow.

"Welcome to our home, Kelly," said the woman, Esme. She beamed at me as if I were the most precious thing she'd ever seen. Which was baffling, to say the least.

Behind Esme a crowd had started to assemble. Carlisle had taken his place beside her and his arm was wrapped around her.

A boisterous laugh made me jump a mile in the air and a booming voice said "Are you adopting another one Brangelina?"

I knew this was Emmett even before various hands slapped the back of his head and chuckled his name.

"Don't mind Emmett, he's an idiot," said the blonde next to him. Rosalie. Emmett pretended to look hurt but then just gave her a noogie, messing up her hair. Everyone looked at him like he was begging to be murdered, but Rosalie just laughed, which made everyone relax. I could feel my eyebrows inching up higher and higher on my forehead. This was all so… normal. Like they were actually an average family laughing and teasing each other. Edward had been leaning on his car this whole time, laughing at my expression when suddenly a little figure dashed out of the house toward Edward. He didn't seem surprised at all. Just hugged the little creature.

"Hi daddy! Welcome home, I missed you!" it said.

"I missed you too, Ness."

Renesmee smiled, relief colored her face as if she thought he hadn't. I was just wondering where Bella was when she emerged from the house, ran up to Edward and planted a kiss on him. And another. And another. "Welcome back" I heard her whisper.

Emmett made a gagging noise and told them to get a room.

I had told myself that I wouldn't get attached to the Cullens in any way but Emmett was making it hard. I felt myself smile at him. He reminded me a lot of Kevin. Suddenly thinking about Kevin made me think of Lex which made me think of my parents and I dropped the smile.

Edward looked over at me, concerned, and then looked at Carlisle, who then turned to address his family. "Okay everyone, as you know, this is Kelly. She was changed a week ago by an unknown vampire. We met her in New York. Now, she hasn't hunted for a while so Bella? Alice? Could you go to the forest with her and tell her all about our gourmet wildlife?"

Alice started bouncing – _bouncing – _and grabbed my and Bella's hands. "Okay, let's go!"

But instead of going to the direction of the trees, she started leading us to the house.

"Um, Alice? He meant the real forest. Not the one in your closet." said Emmett.

Alice scowled at him. "Shut up Emmett. Remember when Bella went on her first hunting trip? Her clothes were ripped to shreds," here she cringed. "So I'm giving Kelly some of my old stuff that she can wear."

Everyone nodded, apparently satisfied that this made sense.

Emmett wasn't kidding when he called Alice's closet a forest. Albeit a very neat and organized forest. She started rummaging around the closet until the clothes completely engulfed her. I turned to Bella before I could stop myself. "Should we call for help? What if she drowns in there?"

Bella looked surprised for a moment and then she laughed. "Nah, she'll make it out."

To prove Bella's point, Alice's arm poked out from the closet. She was holding out three hangers. One had a white tank top on it, the other a simple long-sleeved black dress, and the third a pair of light purple leggings. "The colors will look nice on you," her voice came from somewhere deep within the clothes.

I studied the outfit that she was still holding out to me. Alice wiggled it in my face, prompting me to take it. "You call these hunting clothes?"

"You're lucky, she made me wear a cocktail dress," grumbled Bella.

Alice remembered the day Bella woke up and I got to see the dress she was talking about.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Alice?" I said. "Don't you think I'd hunt better with the jeans I already have on?"

"Nope," she answered. Quick and easy.

Bella leaned in to whisper in my ear. What was the point? Alice would still be able to hear her. Heck, the whole house was able to hear us. "Just put them on, the quicker you do, the quicker we can find something to eat."

Didn't she mean drink? I just shrugged and put them on. Bella was right. My thirst had been briefly forgotten since meeting the Cullens, but now it came back. With a vengeance. I swiftly pulled the dress on over the tank top and pulled on the leggings. The dress fell to about mid-thigh and it was made out of a very light fabric. Cotton. Alice shoved a pair of flats into my hands and I quickly put them on. The burning was getting quite unbearable now. Alice reached into the closet one more time before declaring that we were ready to go.

* * *

"Close your eyes."

I closed my eyes.

"Now just listen," Alice instructed me.

I listened.

The world was alive with the chatter of birds and insects and… elk. They were as quiet as a fire truck to these ears. Then I heard something else. Something that made my throat burn and my mouth water. The sound of blood pumping through veins. Bella had told me to act on instinct alone so I let myself sprint in the direction of the blood. The animal noticed me a millisecond too late. My teeth had already sunk into its neck and drained it of blood. I winced a little. Animal blood compared to human blood… it was like brussels sprouts compared to a big, juicy steak.

Alice and Bella caught up to me.

"How was it?" asked Bella.

I shrugged. "Blood is blood, I guess."

"True," Alice agreed. "Hey look, Bella, not a hair out of place on her first kill!" she laughed.

I looked at the ground. "This wasn't my first kill."

"It wasn't? But Carlisle said you were really thirsty when they found you."

"That's true, but I had… I'd already k-… killed two people before that."

Alice and Bella exchanged a glance, and my face would've been on fire if I were still human. Then again, if I were human I wouldn't be in this situation.

Suddenly Alice stepped forward and pulled me into a hug and I stiffened.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly. "But it's nothing to be ashamed of. Newborn emotions and actions are very hard to control. No one blames you for being what you are."

But I knew better. The businessman's son. He would blame me if he knew. He would wish for my death, no doubt. But to Alice I just nodded. I appreciated her trying to make me feel better. Maybe there was more to her than an overly-happy shopaholic pixie.

We hunted for about an hour. It was elk after elk after elk until finally Alice decided I should try some mountain lion. It was still not as good as human, but far better than the herbivores I'd been drinking from. When I finished draining the big cat, I found Alice beaming at me and Bella frowning at the spot over my head.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh, Bella's just jealous that you can take down a mountain lion without a single tear on your clothes," Alice giggled.

Bella's mouth twitched, as if fighting a smile. "I'm not jealous."

"You are so jealous. Face it Bells, Kelly is a better vampire than you!"

I flinched. But I didn't _want _to be a better vampire than Bella. I didn't want to be a better vampire than anyone. I just wanted to be human.

Alice and Bella were so engaged with teasing each other that they didn't notice my flinching. When Alice did look my way, she was still smiling. "I guess we won't be needing this," she reached into the hollow of a tree and pulled out another dress. It was the same one that I was wearing now, but red. I raised an eyebrow at the color choice.

_What, did she want it to match my eyes? _I thought sarcastically.

"Alice what's wrong?" Bella asked. Alice seemed to be concentrating on something, a look of frustration touching each of her features.

She let out a huff of air. "I can't see anything."

Bella looked briefly perplexed before she suddenly got it. "Oh, Jacob's here?

"Probably," said Alice. Then her eyes suddenly widened and she gasped. "No! No, no, no he's going to ruin _everything_!"

* * *

**Please give me any constructive criticism you have, is there anything I can improve on in my writing? I'll only know if you review. :)**

**Announcement: Remember how I said I was moving? Well, it's to the other side of the world. I'll be staying in a hotel starting Wednesday, September 23rd and my flight is later that week. I don't know how long I'll be without internet, maybe 2 weeks, maybe 2 months, so I'm really sorry, I won't be able to update in a while. I promise if you stick with me, the story will just keep getting better and better! You're all awesome, awesome people. :D**

**Hope you liked this chapter. :) **

**~wolfienur**


	7. Meetings

**I'm back! Sorry for the long wait, but here...finally...is Chapter 7.**

**This chapter is dedicated to my two sisters, who, on the night I finished this, showed me their true colours. As weirdos. But I love them. :D**

**And also to my friend BeckyMusic, she's got her own fanfic called Enemy Camp. It's pretty good, check it out. :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Ohhhh well.**

**Review!**

* * *

**7. Meetings **

Alice sprinted off toward the house before anyone could react to what she'd said. I looked over at Bella questioningly. She just sighed and motioned for me to follow her. Alice's outburst about Jacob had been accompanied by an image of him holding on to Renesmee protectively from a red-eyed Bella. Hmm, that was confusing.

When we neared the white building, I was assaulted by a _horrible _smell. It was absolutely acrid! Surely, it would have made a human faint. After they'd puked. And cried. That's how bad it was. It made me want to cry.

"What_ is_ that?" I asked no one in particular.

"That," replied Bella "is Jacob Black."

As if on cue, a very tall, very tan man emerged from the Cullen house, Renesmee on his shoulders, playfully tugging at his shiny black hair. He stopped short when he saw me, and Rosalie quickly took Renesmee off his back.

"Who is_ that_?" the man–Jacob—said in a low growl.

"This is Kelly. She's a friend," Edward was subtly arranging himself so he was a little in front of me.

"She's a newborn."

Bella placed a hand on his muscular arm. "Jake, it's okay. She wants to become a vegetarian. Like us. In fact, we just came back from hunting."

Suddenly Jacob started shaking and his voice rose. "You're not housing another one! How do you know you can trust her! Look at her eyes!"

How dare he? Judging me before I even said a word! Before I could defend myself he kept going.

"If this keeps happening, if you keep bringing in new bloodsuckers into the world, do you know how fast kids in La Push are going to start phasing? Heck, Sam's kid could start right out of the freaking womb!"

I snarled–involuntarily–and crouched down. Jacob immediately reacted by dropping on all fours, already in his wolf form. What happened next was a blur of limbs and fur and cracking bones.

* * *

Bella, Renesmee and Carlisle surrounded Jacob on the couch, trying to get him to phase back to human so his broken bones could heal properly.

"This is extreme déjà vu from when Bella lost it with the dog a year ago," Rosalie laughed. "Except this time _you _actually got your intended target!"

Emmett joined her laughter and even smacked me playfully on the back. Just like when Alice had unexpectedly hugged me, I became rigid. _Don't get attached, don't get attached. _I chanted to myself. Edward peered at me briefly, but otherwise gave no sign that he heard anything.

"Is he awake? Is he hungry?" came Esme's sweet voice from the kitchen.

Carlisle answered his wife. "He's coming to, and he's always hungry."

Esme laughed. "Ask him what he's hungry for will you?"

_My extinction, _I thought. Edward snorted, apparently thinking I was joking. He smiled at me in a reassuring kind of way, purposely bringing up the memory of him trying to act as shield between Jacob and me. I offered him a mental thanks.

"Ungh…where's…where's the, ah, the…um, blood…bloodsucker?" Jacob was finally awake and human. _Very _human. Edward and Bella moved quickly to cover Renesmee's eyes.

"Shh, you're not to talk yet," said Carlisle, placing a blanket over his body.

"But…where is she?" he was gaining lucidity. "I can smell her."

"Yeah, I can smell you too. You're not exactly fresh." I said dryly, much to the amusement of everyone in the house. Except, of course, Jacob. He sat up and glared at me. I glared right back. I had made my decision the very first time he opened his mouth. I did not like Jacob Black.

Jasper shifted uncomfortably in a corner.

"Edward. Carlisle. You've gotta realize that she's a danger to the people of Forks _and _La Push," said the shape shifter. "If she attacks me just because she was provoked by what I said, imagine what she'll do when she's provoked by someone's blood!"

God, I wished he would shut the hell up. He doesn't even know me!

"I don't drink human blood," _anymore. _I added.

Jacob went on as if he hadn't heard me. "I'll need to discuss this with Sam and the others. We'll hold a tribe meeting. She'll have to come."

* * *

After a lot of argument, I ended up going. My entourage – for lack of a better word – included Carlisle (as the leader of the coven), Edward (for obvious mind-reading reasons), Jasper (to calm down the crowd, if need be), and Emmett (for extra muscle). The meeting took place the next day, after Jacob had completely healed and went to inform the tribe leaders. Before we left, everyone's respective partners kissed each other goodbye and I felt a sudden pang of loneliness. Not only was I the newbie in this 'family', but it was exceptionally awkward when they were all coupled up. I tried squashing the tiny peep of jealousy but it was too late. Jasper and Edward already looked a little guilty. Ah, darn.

We piled into Emmett's jeep and drove for a few minutes before Emmett braked and we piled back out. The place was empty. No one was there. Were we early?

"No," Edward answered me. "We're going to run from here. To the field."

At the word 'field', all of the Cullens' brains filled to the brim with memories. Baseball games, a tracker named James and his girlfriend Victoria, an army of newborn vampires (I seemed to have no trouble thinking the word now. Saying it out loud though, was another matter), the newborn girl who was in so much pain–I know now that her name was Bree–a bunch of pasty-skinned, majestic-looking group of vampires in dark cloaks…

The onslaught of images made me cringe. It was akin to the feeling you get, being in a room packed with people talking all at once, at the top of their lungs—while you were having the biggest headache of your life. And as if that weren't bad enough, the mood of the memories were all grim and associated with evil. As if the roomful of people were discussing your biggest fears and failures, right in your face. I covered my ears with my hands.

"Could you stop? Please!" I begged them, quite pitifully.

No one stopped reminiscing except Edward, who knew exactly what I meant.

"Think of current events," he told everyone. Immediately my head cleared and I could have collapsed from the relief of it all.

"What's wrong, Kelly? Why were you so distressed?" Jasper asked, but I was too busy reveling in the delicious emptiness to answer him, so Edward did.

"All of us were remembering everything connected to the field—" here the images flooded in again.

"Current events!" Edward whisper-screamed.

Silence.

Edward continued. "Anyway. We were all remembering things that happened in the field–current events!–And since all the memories from there–currents events!–are bad, it overwhelmed her. Current events! It's the same with me, when I'm in a room with too many people thinking about too many things, but I've learned to tune some people out. A luxury Kelly doesn't have yet. Current events."

I suddenly burst out laughing. Edward's explanation littered with 'current events' seemed so hilarious to me. Edward laughed along with me. Then Emmett. And finally Jasper and Carlisle.

"Is that you, leeches?" Jacob's irritated voice cut through our fun moment like a knife through butter and we were all reminded why we were there.

"Yes. It's us," Carlisle's voice was very calm and warm.

"Well c'mon." Jacob's was not.

The Cullens and I ran to where the La Push tribe was situated. The sheer number of them was so overwhelming I didn't even bother to count how many there were. All the shape shifters were assembled behind three old men, one young one, and Jacob. There was only one girl among the crowd. A scowl seemed permanently etched on her beautiful face.

_Who am I trying to please? _I asked only Edward.

He provided me with memories of names and faces. The three old men—Billy Black, Quil Ateara Sr., and Levi Uley—Sam Uley, Leah and Seth Clearwater, and of course, Jacob Black. I sighed. They all looked like a tough crowd. Except for the one named Seth. He grinned at us and discreetly waved to Edward, remembering a recent game of thumb war he'd won.

One of the elders, Billy Black, cleared his throat and announced that "we are now in session."

"State your name and how you came to be a pale-face," said Jacob's father, in what had to be the most authoritative voice I'd ever heard.

"My name is uh, Kelly…Kelly Walker," I stammered. "I was bitten by this guy in New York. I don't know what his name is." As usual, when I thought about the stranger who ruined my life, a scary sort of hatred flowed through my icy veins and engulfed me completely. I shot Jasper an apologetic look when I noticed he was deeply squirming.

"How did you come across the Cullens?" Billy Black asked without missing a beat.

"Um, in New York. At the, uh, hospital." Ugh, could I sound any dumber with my 'uhs' and 'ums'?

Billy, and occasionally others, kept quizzing me on my life since turning into a "pale-face". It was very awkward (and a little depressing) talking about the businessman but not so much for the despicable Carl. I don't know why, but I purposely omitted the part about me being able to see other peoples' memories. Edward didn't seem too concerned about it though, so I wasn't either.

I noticed Leah Clearwater never—not once—stopped glaring at me. I wanted to tell her to cut it out, she might get premature wrinkles, but since she was on the list of people to please, I decided to keep quiet.

The last question of the day (thank goodness) came from Sam Uley. "Why do you want to join the Cullens? Why are you willing to give up human blood?"

I looked down at the flats Alice had given me the day before as I answered. "Because…because I don't want to feel that way again. Right after I've sucked the person dry…I'm—I'm overwhelmed with this feeling of horror and guilt, and I just… I hate myself. I don't want to take another human's life. To take them away from their families."

Someone in the crowd laughed. Not nicely. "Yeah right," said that someone.

I was taken aback. "Excuse me?"

"Do you think for one second, leech," Leah was slowly walking toward me, "that we believe all that crap you just said?"

"You should," I hissed. "Since every word is true."

She seemed to find this hilarious. "True! You parasites wouldn't know truth if it latched onto your skin and sang 'The Climb!'"

I could feel my newborn self getting angrier and angrier by the second but instead of waiting for disaster to strike, I clenched my fists and walked away. The other option was to attack her like I did with Jacob, but then have the other twenty-something wolves descend on me too.

"Jacob," said Carlisle, "We didn't come here to be taunted." He looked calm as always, but you didn't have to be a genius to figure out what he really meant. _Make her behave._

Jacob sighed and turned to Leah. "Leah, shut up."

She scowled at him but otherwise remained silent. Wow. That was easy.

"We have heard the story of Kelly Walker," the gravelly old voice of Quil Sr. said, "now it is time to take a vote. Those who wish to let her live here, raise your hands."

No one did.

I couldn't help it. I felt a stab of hurt. I shouldn't have cared what they thought about me. After all, I didn't want to stay here either, but—

A hand! Seth Clearwater raised his hand!

It took all of my willpower not to run over to where he stood and hug him. But I had to appear professional, so I only nodded.

"Not to go all 'Survivor' on you, but, 'the tribe has spoken.'" Jacob managed to joke, even in this horrible situation.

Edward was suddenly tense. "Wait! You can't—Give us six months. If in the six months she doesn't hurt anyone…then she gets to stay."

"I think that's fair, don't you, Jake?" Seth spoke for the first time. It earned him a smack from his sister. Sam, Jacob and the elders looked at each other, their expressions heavy. Edward was concentrating on what each of them were thinking, Carlisle was watching Edward, Emmett was watching Carlisle watch Edward, and Jasper was still squirming from the feelings of hostility that even _I _could feel. Finally, after what seemed like forever, Billy Black addressed Carlisle. "We'll need to deliberate on this further. We'll meet here again tomorrow, same time. If that's all right with you."

Carlisle nodded. "Of course."

And with that we were running back to the jeep. No one spoke until we reached the house, then everyone bombarded Edward with questions.

"What were they thinking?"

"Have they made their decision?"

"What was with the she-wolf?"

"Why did you come up with the six-month deal?"

The last question came from me. I'd been thinking about it since we left the field. The original plan was to try and convince the wolves that I was perfectly safe so I could stay. Worst case scenario: they weren't and I'd just go back to New York, or maybe join a trio of sisters in Alaska. It wasn't necessary for Edward to offer the deal. It wasn't even something we'd discussed.

"Kelly, I'm going to tell you something, and you're not going to freak out, understood?" he asked. I nodded.

"If they weren't convinced of your commitment to vegetarianism…" he paused, thinking whether he should continue or not. "They were planning to kill you."

"They _what_?" someone shrieked. We all looked toward the front door of the house, where Renesmee was standing, mouth open and eyes wide. "Uncle Jake was going to kill Kelly?"

I let out a huff of surprised air as Edward flew out of the car to comfort his daughter. They were planning to…kill…me? What hypocrites. They want to make sure _I _don't hurt anyone but all along… Why? I mean, if they told me to leave I would have. I didn't want to come to Forks in the first place.

Quietly, Jasper slipped out of the car, a confused expression on his face. Emmett followed him, but not before awkwardly patting my knee and saying "Sorry, Kelly."

Carlisle asked me if I wanted to talk about it but I just shook my head distractedly until he too, left.

I stayed in the Jeep for ages. Edward must have told everyone to leave me alone, but eventually Alice popped up near my window.

"Let's go," she said.

"Where?"

Her face was all serious as she answered. "Shopping."

* * *

Shopping with Alice Cullen… well, let's just say it was a unique experience. By the time we were done, shopping bags filled Alice's car until all you could see through the windows were brand names. But that still left remaining bags so Alice called for Emmett's jeep and Edward's spacious Volvo. During the whole shopping trip—it was just Alice and I—we never discussed what happened at the meeting. Instead, she effectively kept my mind off of it by informing me about the difference between bags and totes, skinny jeans versus boot cut jeans and the like. I actually had a good time with her. As soon as we got home though, there was nothing to do but face the facts.

All of the Cullens were seated at the dining table (although Jasper was mysteriously absent). As far as I could tell, this was all the table was used for. Meetings. Scary, life-changing (or life-ending) meetings.

I was trying to figure out why everyone was gathered here but no one was recalling any events. They must be too absorbed with the present.

Beside me, Alice was still and quiet for the first time that day. Her eyes were wide and surprised but her lips were slowly forming a wide grin. Edward gave her a warning look.

"What?" I asked him.

Carlisle smiled at me. "Have a seat, Kelly. We have some news."

Okay… he's smiling so that's good, right? I sat down. I expected Alice to sit too but she stayed standing, fidgeting with whatever was around her and smiling at me.

"Sam Uley called to cancel tomorrow's meeting," said Edward. Uh-oh, this couldn't be good. "It seems they've already come to a decision."

I felt myself deflate a little. "They have?"

"Yes. And they've decided to take Edward up on his offer," grinned Carlisle.

Wait. What? "Why?"

Carlisle frowned a little. "What do you mean 'Why'? They obviously thought about it and saw you were trustworthy."

"Um, hello?" said Emmett. "Did you not hear Leah? And did you not catch that nobody other than Seth raised his hand at the vote? They don't like vampires. They've learned to work with us but that's it. They _hate _newborns. They're not suddenly going to go 'Oh that Kelly sure is swell. Let's have another resident vampire!' Especially now that kids in La Push are phasing earlier and earlier."

Everyone stared at Emmett.

"Em's right," Edward sighed, "well, I guess we'll get our answer later when Jacob comes over. He hasn't seen Nes—Renesmee all day. It's only a matter of time." He sighed again.

Edward was spot on. Jacob arrived only ten minutes after he uttered that sentence. In those ten minutes, Alice had organized _all _of the clothes we (she) bought inside of Edward's closet. Apparently I was being given his old room. There was a huge bed in there that made me extremely uncomfortable. If he didn't sleep in it then… I shuddered.

We could all smell Jacob before we saw him. When he came in he just hovered near the door, glaring at me.

"Do you want something to eat, Jacob?" Esme asked.

"No. I'm just here to see Nessie. Where is she anyway?"

"I'm here," Renesmee stepped out from the kitchen but made no move toward the shape-shifter like her memories told me she normally did. Jacob smiled and went over to pick her up but at the last minute she crossed her arms. "Well you've seen me. Now you can go."

And with that she turned away and ran up the stairs. Everybody's jaw hit the floor then.

"What... What just happened?" Jacob looked to Edward, who sighed for the umpteenth time that day.

"She found out you were planning to kill Kelly and she freaked out."

At the mention of my name, Jacob started shaking. He shot me an accusatory stare. "You told her didn't you? You told her so you could gain pity points and turn her against us!" He was starting to use the 'pack plural'.

"I didn't tell her anything," I spat at him. "Renesmee is a very smart girl; she must have realized what pretentious, hypocritical _dogs _you really are!"

"You filthy leech!" Jacob growled and was about to lunge at me before Edward and Emmett both caught hold of him and he suddenly slumped down.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Jasper in the doorway. He probably directed some lethargy at the wolf.

"Get him outside," Carlisle said. Emmett took Jacob's full weight easily and went out the back door. Jasper and Bella went with him.

"What a day," I muttered, "I'm going to go for a walk. Or a run. Or whatever you guys do when you want to think."

Edward took a step closer to me. "I'll come with you," he said.

"I'd rather not have my mind read right now, actually."

"Kelly…I'm not sure it's a good idea for you to be roaming around alone. It could end up in a huge misunderstanding."

It was my turn to sigh.

"Fine."

* * *

Instead of Edward, Bella accompanied me on my walk. The reason being: she couldn't read anything off of me and vice versa. Complete peace. For the first time since meeting the Cullens, I could think freely. At first there was idle chitchat between Bella and me. About where we were born (me: New York, her: Arizona), how many siblings we had (me: one sister, her: none), what our dads did (mine: college professor, hers: Chief of police), what our favourite books are and normal, neutral things like that. Then the conversation died down and I was left wondering about the Quileute Tribe's decision about keeping me alive. Why? Why would they take such a risk? And Jacob? I'm told he's the alpha male of the wolf pack and he hates me, so why is he _letting _them take that risk? Why, why, why? So many questions. My life is all questions and uncertainty now.

Suddenly I heard Bella's voice calling my name and telling me we should head back now. I looked down at my (brand new) watch and was surprised to see we'd been out for nearly three hours. I guess time flies when you're immortal.

When we got back to the house Jacob was gone—but his _lovely _fragrance stayed behind—and the Cullens were back at the dining table.

"Have a nice walk, Walker?" Emmett joked.

I held back a smile. "Yeah. It was nice and quiet…sort of."

Nothing is quiet to these ears.

Bella went over and sat down next to Edward. "How's Jake?"

"Upset. To say the least. He stormed off as soon as Jasper stopped messing with his emotions."

I leaned against the wall, although I really didn't need to. "Did he tell you why the Tribe decided to let me live? And why they told us today and not tomorrow at the meeting?"

"He didn't tell me but…I read his mind." Edward said sheepishly.

"Well?" I asked, a tad impatient.

"It was because of Seth. He convinced the elders by pointing out that Jacob's best friend is a vampire, and that his imprint is half of one. He said Jacob would be a hypocrite if two of the most important people in his life were vampires, yet he would so readily kill one who is _trying _to follow in our footsteps and be a quote: 'human-lover'. And he reminded them of the greeting card moments we shared. Such as the stand-off with the Volturi last year."

Volturi. The word caused me to shiver even though I didn't really know who they were.

To my left, Emmett gave a sort of grunt/snort. "Greeting card moments. Good one."

"So that's it?" Bella asked. "That's all it took for them to change their mind?"

Edward shrugged. "I guess so. But now that Jacob thinks Kelly turned Renesmee against him… I don't think this is good."

"You didn't answer why they told us a day earlier," Alice stated.

"Oh, right. Well, because Sam didn't want to waste any time. Especially since Emily'sdue any day now. He wants to be with her twenty four-seven."

"Kelly," Carlisle said, "I think it would be wise for you to talk to Nessie. I know you and Jacob aren't exactly the best of friends, but you should know… Renesmee's rejection could destroy him."

I sighed and looked over at Edward, who nodded in encouragement.

"Okay. I'll see what I can do."


	8. Routine

**8. Routine**

"And this is _my_ room," said Renesmee on the last stop of her little home tour. We had gone to her and her parents' little cottage-like house in the woods.

It was a small room, but very cozy. The room was painted a light brown that matched Renesmee's eyes, and the curtains were a deep creamy colour. And there were books everywhere. On the shelves lining the walls, piled on the desk in the corner, on and under her bed. And they weren't children's books either. They each had to be at least 200 pages.

_This is my kind of paradise, _I thought to myself.

It was an impressive collection for a little girl. I turned back to her.

"How old are you again?" I asked jokingly.

Renesmee just smiled and sat down on her bed. Her smile faltered and I caught a glimpse of her turning her back on Jacob. I sighed and sat down on a nearby chair, unsure of what to do or say.

Before the pause could become awkward, I quietly said, "They're letting me live, you know."

"I know," said Renesmee, "but that doesn't change the fact that they were _going _to kill you."

"They were just trying to protect the tribe. I don't blame them, and neither should you," Okay. I was lying. About the not blaming them part, anyway. But she didn't seem to notice.

"But I thought they liked us," she grumbled.

"Us?"

"Vampires." Oh, right.

"Well, they're just not used to me. That's all."

Suddenly Renesmee looked up at me, suspicion on her face. "Why are you defending them anyway? I've seen you fight with Jake. You hate him."

"The thing is…now Jacob thinks I turned you against him and…well, he's not happy about it."

"And you're afraid now he'll kill you just because of that?"

I nodded.

"Well he can't," said Renesmee indignantly, "the treaty says they can't kill any of the Cullens without provocation. And you're a Cullen now."

What? A Cullen? No, she's wrong. I wasn't a Cullen. I'd been with them for just two days, how could I be?

Renesmee reached out to hold my hand, but unlike when Alice or Emmett touched me, I didn't flinch or pull away. She was showing me something. A thought, not a memory. Me and the Cullens, but in her head it wasn't "Kelly and the Cullens", we were just…one unit. I was already part of the family in her world.

"That's sweet, Renesmee, thanks."

"My friends call me Nessie," she grinned.

"Okay, Nessie," I grinned back.

We stood up and walked back to the main house. At one point I asked her why she cared so much whether I lived or died when she had just met me.

"You just answered your own question," she said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You're the only person I know who hasn't known me since I was a fetus. When they first found out about me, everyone but my mom and Aunt Rose referred to me as 'the abomination in Bella's stomach that needed to be removed', but you only know me as 'Bella and Edward's daughter'. I don't know why, but it makes a difference."

I surprised myself by holding my hand out to her, but she just took it and smiled as if we'd been friends forever.

When we arrived back at the house, we were greeted by the sight of Carlisle and Edward watching the evening news, Bella reading a book while Alice played with her hair, and Esme watering the plants. From the backyard, I could hear Jasper and Emmett wrestling.

"Oh good, you're back!" Alice chirped at me. "Come on, we need to find you something nice to wear."

"Why?" I asked, perplexed. "Are we going somewhere?"

Alice made a sound of exasperation. "Why does everyone think that you have to be going somewhere to look nice?"

Before I could answer her, something on the TV caught my attention. It was a picture of…me. From my student card. In the background the newscaster was saying, "Kelly Walker, eighteen, disappeared on January 10th at around eleven o' clock at night. She has been missing for a little under two weeks now. Officials have not yet found a body, but a red jacket confirmed to be the victims' was discovered under a blanket of snow about half a mile from where witnesses last saw her."

Oh. My. God.

I barely had time to digest this before they cut to a video clip of my parents at a sort of press conference. My mother's face was blotchy and red as she kept dabbing her eyes with a tissue. It was my dad who addressed the hungry media with their cameras and microphones shoved in his face.

"Please," he said, "we want our little girl back. We _know_ she's still alive, and as long as there is no hard evidence proving otherwise, we will not lose hope."

My parents were just about to climb off the stage when suddenly my mom turned back to the podium and looked directly at the camera, "Kelly, baby, if you're watching this…know that we love you. And we miss you. Please come home." Her voice cracked on the word 'home', and my heart cracked with it. This new body of mine feels no physical pain, but what use is that when your heart is so vulnerable?

I was vaguely aware of making a choking sound before I sprinted out of the house. Good thing the door was still open or I might have broken it.

"Kelly! Wait!" Edward's voice only made me run faster. The image of my mother's teary eyes didn't slow me down either. That was the most disturbing thing of all. My mom doesn't cry. I only ever saw her cry once and that was when her best friends of thirty years lost her battle with cancer. Gradually, I stopped running, not because I was tired, but because it didn't feel right to run while sobs were wracking my body. I curled up next to a big boulder and let loose all the horrible sounds you make when you cry one of those big, 'ugly' cries.

At some point, a pair of warm arms engulfed me in a hug and I heard Alice's voice making soothing sounds trying to comfort me. Instead of cringing away, I clung to her like a toddler. I don't know how long we stayed there, but by the time I regained control of myself, the sun was long gone and the stars were shining in all their glory. It was really amazing. You don't see stars in Manhattan because of all the light pollution, so this display of Mother Nature lifted my spirits some.

"Thanks, Alice," I said on the way back to the house.

"You're welcome."

That's it. Surprisingly, Alice didn't say another word on the walk home.

I suddenly stopped short. Did I just say _home_? Do I consider the Cullen residence my home now? Looking at Alice and remembering my talk with Renes—Nessie, I know the answer.

Yes.

* * *

Nights in the Cullen house were the worst.

Edward, Bella and Nessie went back to their cottage; Emmett and Rosalie retired up to their room and so did Jasper and Alice. Carlisle mostly spent his time in the study and Esme did a lot of reading (cookbooks and home décor). On the first night I was there, I listened to all of Edward's CDs until the sun came up. Tonight, Alice offered to hang out with me but I insisted she spend time with Jasper. I had been monopolizing her for most of today so I felt it was only fair.

I found several sheets of paper and a pen in Edward's room and decided I'd write. When I was still human, I used to keep a journal. Back when I was 8-years-old, my sister and I had had this huge fight. We went 2 whole days without speaking to each other until finally, my mom made us write down our feelings on a piece of paper. Surprisingly, it helped. We made up, but later I realized I liked venting my feelings on paper so I continued with the practice. I don't like to rant to people because, well, sometimes they were to busy ranting to _me. _So, for the next ten years, paper was my number one confidant. The things that I couldn't tell anyone else—not even Lex—I wrote it down. But I didn't use my journal just for writing down bad things. Anything remotely interesting that happened ended up in there and I wrote down every detail of it.

By the time I finished, I felt as if a weight had been lifted from my chest. Although I still ached a bit. I wished someone from my human life were here for me to talk to. Just a little bit of familiarity would be nice. I shook the thought from my head. _Don't be stupid, _I thought, _if there was a human within twenty feet of you, you'd kill them._

I sighed. How depressing.

I heard stirring in the house as everyone 'woke up'. After changing into a long-sleeved purple shirt and jeans, I made my way downstairs. Everyone else was already there. Alice frowned a little at the simplicity of my outfit but said nothing about it.

"Did you sleep well?" she joked.

"Like a baby," I replied, smiling.

Jasper and Emmett were absorbed in a game of Guitar Hero, but Jasper snuck a glance at me, noticing my lighter mood.

Just then Nessie burst through the door.

"I thought I heard Guitar Hero! Lemme play, I'll wipe the floor with your butts!"

Jasper chuckled and handed his guitar over to her. "Where are your parents, Ness?" he asked.

"Still at home," she said distractedly, while picking a song to play.

"Bet they're shaking up the forest floor," Emmett guffawed, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Oh, yuck.

* * *

Nessie hung up the phone. "He'll be here in ten minutes, he says."

Sitting on the kitchen counter, Rosalie groaned. "Just when I thought this house would finally be wolf-free," she muttered.

Nessie had called Jacob and asked him to come over to discuss things. So far, our conversations had all ended with one of us trying to kill the other, so forgive me if I was less than excited about this 'discussion'.

As promised Jacob arrived ten minutes later. Again, he hovered near the front door but didn't glare at me. Instead, he was staring at Renesmee. She went up to him and placed a hand on his cheek. It was almost a comical sight, because Ness had to stand on her tippy toes, while Jacob had to hunch his back. Emotions like annoyance, anger and confusion crossed his face until he finally looked happy and relieved. I wondered what Ness was 'saying' to him, but he must have accepted it because he swooped her up in a bear hug. Or a wolf hug, I suppose.

When they finally let go, Nessie asked him if he was hungry. He started to say yes when his eyes landed on me.

"Oh," he said icily, "actually, I just lost my appetite."

I couldn't help it. My body reacted faster than my brain and I found myself growling at him. The only thing that kept me from ripping Jacob to shreds was Renesmee's wide eyes. _Please don't, _she mouthed. A wave of calm rippled through me thanks to Jasper, and I tried to take a deep breath, but Jacob's stink hardly made that a pleasant experience.

"Alice," said Edward, "why don't you and Kelly go hunting?"

"Good idea, Edward! Let's go Kelly!" Alice gripped my arm with all her might and danced out the front door. On my way out, Jacob and I bumped shoulders, causing both of us to cringe. I slapped at my shoulder, as if his touch left a slimy residue that I could simply wipe off.

"Ew. Alice I touched him! Ew!" I squealed. I felt like I was 6 years old again, afraid of cooties.

Alice laughed, "Don't be ridiculous, Kelly. He's not poisonous."

"You sure about that?" I grumbled.

For the next few hours we hunted until Alice said, "I can see clearly again. He's gone."

I know it was incredibly childish of me, but as soon as we got back I sprinted to Edward's old room, ripped off the purple shirt and put on a new top. Untouched by any werewolf. Ah, I felt so much better.

Downstairs I heard boisterous laughs. No doubt, Edward and Alice had told the others what I was doing. Before I headed back down, I looked at myself in the mirror for the first time since I left New York. I hadn't showered since I was human, but it didn't show. I guess when you're immortal, a shower everyday would just be a nuisance. My irises were still that aggressive shade of red, but it had only been a few days. Bella said it took her about three months before her eyes toned down in colour.

It's all right. I could wait.

* * *

Another week had passed and we'd all fallen into a sort of routine. Carlisle and Edward frequently watched the news but turned to the Disney channel whenever the newscaster wanted to 'update' us about my disappearance. Bella would lend me her books for me to read during the nights, and I played Guitar Hero with Emmett during the day (I always won). Even though Rosalie and I got along, we didn't talk much. There were two main reasons for that. One: we just didn't have that much in common besides both of us wishing we had never been turned. Two: her amazing beauty just intimidated me too much. I always felt like a rat standing beside her.

Jasper kept his distance from me because even though I was a little happier, there were still moments when Emmett would remind me of Kevin, or Esme would remind me of my mom, and my mood just took a nose dive. Plus, he still reminded me of Fire Eyes (and we all know how much I just _adore _Fire Eyes).

In the afternoons, me and Nessie would sit on the couch together and watch TV until Jacob came for his daily visit and I'd leave the house with Alice. On the days when we were too full to hunt, Alice would drive us to Port Angeles and we'd sit in the car with the windows rolled down a bit so I could get used to the smell of human. It was agonizing. Every time someone walked a little too close to the car, it took all of my willpower, and some of Alice's guidance, not to crawl out the window and suck them dry.

On one such day, Alice decided I could handle it if the windows were opened a tad more. Usually, it was barely enough to fit your fingers through, but now she opened them enough for a fist to hang out. Alice made sure I was continually taking deep breaths through my nose while she chattered on about how someday when I mastered this, I could go to school with them in another city.

A thought occurred to me. "How come you're not in school now?"

"We've all 'graduated,'" Alice answered, making air quotes.

"Then isn't it time for you to move on?"

"We were planning to move this year, but you know…Jacob and Nessie. Jake would no doubt follow us, but the pack needs him right now. Kids on the reservation are phasing faster than ever before and they're worried it's in anticipation of something big."

We didn't talk much after that. I just concentrated on breathing and trying not to murder innocent people.

"_Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Mary Alice, happy birthday to you!" A chorus of voices sang the familiar tune to a short girl who looked about eleven-years-old. She had long black hair, icy blue eyes and the way she moved made you think she was dancing. It could only be Alice. _

_A woman who had the same eyes as Alice handed her a doll. "Mary, dear, this is from all of us," she said with a kind smile._

_Alice beamed up at her. "Thank you, mother. I knew you would get me this."_

"_Oh, Mary," Alice's mom frowned, "I wish you wouldn't say things like that." _

"_But, mother, I did! I knew! In my head, mother, I saw you give me this doll."_

"_Mary, enough!" Alice's mom snapped. "Don't make me send you to your room without dinner again."_

_Finally Alice dropped the subject with a pout. Someone who I assumed was her dad gave her a hug. "Happy birthday, darling."_

I blinked. I didn't know if Alice was aware I had seen that or not, but I didn't know what to say. What do you say to someone when you see them get yelled at by a parent in their memory?

"Do you miss her?" I asked, finally.

"Miss who?" Alice turned to me, confused.

I gave her a knowing look. "Your mom."

"I don't know," she said thoughtfully, "I don't really remember her."

It was my turn to be confused. "What do you mean you don't remember her? You just did!"

Alice was staring at me blankly. "You know… your birthday. I think you were eleven or twelve. Your mom gave you a doll, but when you told her you knew she was getting you that, she got mad at you." I said, exasperated. Why did I have to explain myself?

"Kelly…" Alice murmured, her eyes wide. "That's impossible."

I frowned. "Of course it's possible. I just saw it myself. Your mother is about Bella's height, with shoulder length black hair and blue eyes. On that day she was wearing a brown dress with a blue apron. She gave you a cute little doll but got snappish when you said you foresaw her gift. I witnessed all that myself, and you're telling me you don't remember?"

Alice shook here head. "I don't. I don't remember anything."

* * *

**Hola readers! Why have ya'll been stingy with your reviews? I live for your thoughts!**

**Oh, and just heads up, I'm moving to China on Friday (tomorrow) so, no updates for a while.**


	9. Visitors

**WOW. 20 reviews? You all are so AMAZING! I never thought I would get so much, so thank you, thank you, thank you! If it wasn't considered inapproriate, I would give each and every one of you a big wet kiss! Well, maybe not. :P And thanks to all of you silent people who added this story to your alerts/faves! You have not gone unnoticed. :D**

**I'd like to give a shout out to several people. My sister, who suggested I move the Cullens to Beijing to "thicken the plot." (Don't worry, I'm not planning on it, lol). My new friend filmyfurry, who put up with my ranting and raving about my posting difficulties and for suggesting the name Tristan! BeckyMusic, who's always there for me, and of course, all you readers. :D **

**Sorry this A/N is so long. I have a lot to say... On with the story!**

* * *

**9. Visitors**

It had been a month since I saw the snippet of Alice's human life.

It seemed like just yesterday when we sped home from Port Angeles, nearly running into at least ten cars. Alice hadn't even stopped the Porsche properly when she practically flew out the door and sprinted into the house.

"EDWARD! CARLISLE!" She had screamed at the top of her pixie lungs. It would have been funny if she didn't look so damn scary.

Immediately, the whole family and Jacob had assembled in front of her, and Jasper was suddenly holding her in his arms.

"What? What is it?" They all asked, looking to Alice, then me.

For some reason, Alice was speechless. It was as if she'd spent all her energy on yelling Edward and Carlisle's names. So I stepped in and told them what had happened. When I was finished I was met with nine gaping mouths.

"Hold up! Hold up, hold up, hold up!" Jacob frowned at me. "You have a power? You can see peoples' memories? And you failed to mention this to the tribe, why?"

I shrugged. "Didn't think it mattered."

Jacob had started trembling with rage; accusing me of lying by omission and threatening to get the pack to drive me out of the country. If you asked me, I would say that he was overreacting. Apparently Jasper agreed with me, because it was he—usually the calmest of the Cullens—who shut the stupid werewolf up.

"Jacob Black, shut UP!" He growled. "So what if Kelly didn't tell you about her power? So _what_? What would you have done with that information anyway? I'd be willing to bet that the answer is _nothing. _You wouldn't have done anything. So just be quiet, and let's help Kelly and Alice figure things out. Agreed?" Jasper's eyes were dangerously narrow and his hold on Alice was so tight, I was almost afraid he would snap her in two.

Jacob's jaw locked and he walked brusquely out the door. I was a _little_ worried that me not telling the pack about my 'gift' would make them uselessly suspicious, but Edward gave me an encouraging shake of the head, telling me that it wouldn't.

"Alice," said Carlisle in a gentle tone, "you're sure that you still don't remember anything from your past? Maybe your subconscious was recalling it and that's what Kelly picked up on."

Alice shook her head urgently. "No, I'm sure. I don't remember anything _at all_."

After that Carlisle had called someone named Eleazar. Everyone was too absorbed with the present to be reminiscing right now so I had no clue who Eleazar was; just that he was from the Denali coven in Alaska.

Carlisle informed us that the earliest Eleazar could come here was in two days. This was when someone finally explained to me that Eleazar is able to determine what a vampire's ability is, or, what a human's might be when they turned. During the two days we were waiting, Alice asked me to try see more things from her human life, but I couldn't. Not fully, anyway. Sometimes I would get a fuzzy image of Alice's mom again, but other than that, the only thing I saw were things that happened in her vampire life.

When Eleazar finally arrived, he was alone, which surprised everyone.

"The others were busy, but they send their regards," he'd said. Then he proceeded to circle around me, staring me up and down. He pursed his lips and squinted his eyes. He stared at me for so long that I started to feel uncomfortable.

Finally he straightened up and announced: "She can see memories."

Um…duh.

"But that's not all!" He continued, feeling our skepticism.

"What else is there?" Carlisle asked.

"So you already know that she can see your memories as you are remembering them, but she can also search through your memories at her own will. You already got a taste of that two days ago did you not?" He asked me.

All I could do was nod.

"But there is more still," said Eleazar, obviously enjoying the shocked look on my face.

"Kelly, when you see a sad memory, how do you feel?" he asked.

"Uh…sad?" I said.

"Yes. And when you see a happy memory, do you feel happy?"

"Yeah…"

"How did you feel when you saw that memory of Alice's mother scolding her?"

I thought about it. "Frustrated."

When he asked me why, I explained because it felt like I had told Alice's mom a million times that I could see the future but she still didn't believe me.

"Yes," Eleazar smiled smugly, like he'd just proven someone wrong. "Apparently you can feel the emotion attached to the memory as well. It's fascinating. Like a mix between Jasper's power and the opposite of Alice's. And, correct me if I'm wrong, but you can remember your human life perfectly can't you?"

I nodded at the same time Bella frowned. "But how can she? I was only changed a year ago but I can remember almost nothing."

Everyone looked expectantly to Eleazar but it was clear that he didn't know. I did, though.

"I think…it's because I kept a diary."

As soon as the words left my mouth, I felt like a loser. I mean, the word 'diary' is so old-fashioned. No one has one these days. It's all about blogs now. I should've just said journal. That sounds less weird.

When Nessie asked how a diary would help, I explained to them how I wrote down events that meant a lot to me (and even some that didn't) and that I wrote about how I felt about those events as well. Eleazar kept nodding his head and exchanged glances with Carlisle. He warned me that searching through someone's memories would probably tire me out, so I should "start small."

When Eleazar left, everyone just sort of…stood there. I didn't know what the others were doing, but I was thinking about what Eleazar had said. So I can actively look through someone's memories and not just when they're thinking about them. Huh. And I can feel the emotions attached to the memory. Plus, I can remember my human life, even though I'm not supposed to. Holy damn, this is awesome!

Alice and I went into overdrive trying to refine my ability. Eleazar was right. It was exhausting. I worked incredibly hard, but all I had to show for it was…well, nothing. It seemed the vision of Alice's past I'd gotten was just a fluke.

Anyway, like I said: that all happened a month ago.

Since then, I'd been trying to see into the pasts of everyone in the house (except for Jacob, of course). I managed to glimpse a blurry picture of a younger-looking Emmett, a human Bella (she lifted her shield for me so I could see), and Rosalie. But Rosalie doesn't really count because she was always reliving that dreadful night that she was turned, so I didn't have to do much.

After Jasper had yelled at him, Jacob managed to stay away from the house for about a day and a half, but then he missed Nessie too much so he pushed his pride aside and came back. Edward was right when he said Jacob wouldn't follow through with his promise to get rid of me. He could see that Nessie was now a little attached to me, and he wouldn't do anything to hurt her. He still openly glared at me though, and he resented the fact that me and Alice didn't go to Port Angeles anymore when he came over. And trust me, the feeling was mutual. I hated being in the same house as him, but it became pretty tiresome to drive to Port Angeles every day. Plus, we wanted to save gas.

"Hey Kels!" Emmett boomed in my ear, snapping me back into the present. "Wanna play some Guitar Hero? Oh, oh, what about Left 4 Dead?"

I was about to say something like, 'Maybe later' or 'Not now' when Alice snapped at him. "She's busy, Em."

Emmett frowned at her and muttered "Stupid Alice and her uncovered past" while walking away.

Me and Alice were sitting at the dining table with Edward and Jasper. Those two always accompanied us when we were having one of our 'memory sessions'. Edward, so that he could see if the memory in my head was being recalled by Alice or not, and Jasper for moral support and a mood boost every now and then. I get frustrated very easily when it comes to something I can't do; a feeling that is no stranger to me.

_Alice and Jasper. Valentine's Day, 1987. Jasper had driven them out to Seattle so they could be alone for the night. The hotel room he had got for them was covered almost completely with rose petals and boxes of chocolates. Everything in the room was either red, pink or white. It was like Cupid had had too much to drink the night before and this was the result. The happy couple took no notice, though, if the way they went straight to the bed was any indication—_

"Whoa! Okay! Stop _right _there!" I squeezed my eyes shut and covered my ears, as if that would help block out the images. "I did not sign up for that!"

Alice's eyes widened. She probably forgot I could see _everything _she recalled. I swear I could see her blush, even though I knew that was impossible.

Jasper looked just as embarrassed, apparently knowing what I'd seen by the emotions rolling off of all of us. Edward chuckled.

"Now you see what I have to go through every day."

* * *

After that embarrassing moment, we all took a break. This was nothing new; I had to take frequent breaks to recover from each session. I plopped down on the couch and closed my eyes. Immediately, Emmett was seated next to me with an Xbox controller in his hand. He shoved another one in mine.

"You know you'll just lose again," I grinned, taking the controller.

"Nuh-uh!" he said, "I've been practicing. I'll definitely stay alive longer than you this time."

The introduction for the game Left 4 Dead came on. We skipped it and went straight to the action. The objective of this game wasn't actually to stay alive longer than the other person; it was to make it through to the last level as a team while killing all the zombies who got in your way. Ten minutes into the game, Jacob and Nessie came home from the beach. Why they would go there in February was a mystery to me.

"Hey guys," Nessie called out. She saw us playing and ran over. "Has Emmett died yet?"

I laughed out loud. "Not yet. But just you wait."

Nessie smiled and sat down at my feet to watch us play. Jacob greeted me with a scowl and strategically placed himself so that he was sitting near enough to Ness but not too close to me. That boy had skill.

I noticed that his stink wasn't as strong anymore. Was I getting used to it? Who knows? But what I did know was that I didn't mind him much anymore. Sure, I was still uncomfortable being around him, but as long as we respected each others' personal bubbles and didn't speak to one another, it was all good. It was almost as if he were invisible; just a shadow in my daily life.

"YES! OH MY GOD, YES!" Emmett shot right out of his seat and jumped up and down, making _me _jump. I looked up at the TV screen to see that my character in the game had been vomited on by an overweight zombie and that led to the character's death.

Ah, frack.

Rosalie poked her head around the wall to see what all the racket was about and rolled her eyes when she saw Emmett do a victory dance.

"Kelly is so smelly 'cause she got hurled on by a zombie!" he chanted over and over.

"For the love of—" I started, but he cut me off with some more "Kelly is so smelly's."

Imagine my relief when Edward and Alice called me over for another memory session. Edward took one look at a still dancing Emmett and said, "Maybe we should go to Port Angeles. It's a little loud in here…"

* * *

The windows were rolled almost halfway down.

We were sitting in Edward's Volvo. Alice had told him how well I was doing with being around human blood, so he rolled down the windows far enough that I could stick my whole head through if I wanted. Not that I did, of course. As a precaution, he had me sitting next to him in the shotgun seat, so he could stop me if the scent got too powerful. Jasper and Alice were in the backseat, holding hands.

"Kelly, you have to calm down. It takes time and practice to be able to master any ability. You're fine." Jasper was trying to make me feel better, because even after my millionth try to access the black void that was Alice's human life, I couldn't see anything. If I were human, tears of frustration would be prickling my eyes right about now.

"Please Kelly, just one more time, and if it doesn't work we can take a break for as long as you want." Alice begged. "Just please…one more time."

She had no idea. No idea how much this power drained me. No idea how worthless it made me feel when I kept failing. But it wasn't her fault. And it wasn't her fault that she wanted to know more about her past. Who was I to deny her this?

I held back a sigh and said "okay."

I closed my eyes and concentrated. When I did that, I could see each individuals' presence. It's kind of indescribable. Like an aura, everyone's presence is a different colour, but not a colour that's ever been discovered or named before. Alice's was beautiful. The closest colour I can compare it with is the sort of light pink you see at sunset, but much prettier. The only thing that detracts from its beauty is the cloud of black (but not really black…if that makes sense) that I think represents the part of Alice's brain where there's nothing. No memories of anything prior to a blood-sucking life.

The first time I saw these colours, both me and Edward had gasped at their loveliness. But now everyone was quiet. They all knew I was close to breaking point. I couldn't fail one more time.

Now, I don't know if any of you have ever searched through someone's brain, but let me tell you: it's not pleasant. Have you ever actually hurt yourself because you were thinking so hard? That's what it feels like, but worse. It feels like your brain is growing arms and clawing itself open. The first time I did this (not counting that one time in Alice's Porsche, a month ago) it felt like I could've passed out from the sensation, but it was better now.

I frowned. Yet again, nothing was happening—

"_Now Mary, I know you think that we don't love you, but we really do. We're doing this for your own good. The things you see…or the things you say you see…they're not normal. This place will fix you right up," Alice's mom was kneeling down in front of her blue-eyed, tearful daughter. _

"_B-b-but—" Alice sniffled, trying desperately to wipe the tears off her face. Human Alice looked older than the last time I saw her. _

"_Hush darling, don't cry." Alice's mom pulled her into a hug. "You're a big girl now. Thirteen years old! Big girls aren't supposed to cry."_

_Apparently these words had the opposite effect because Alice started bawling. _

"_Mommy p-please don't s-s-end me to this place!" She begged, the tears making her stammer. "I p-p-promise I'll be good! I won't say anyth-thing about the future! See?" Here she pretended to lock her lips shut and throw the keys away. Her eyes looked frantic as the tears poured relentlessly down her smooth cheeks. _

"_Mary!"_

_Alice spun around as a little body collapsed against hers. The little girl sobbing on her shoulder had the same black hair as Alice but when she pulled away; her eyes were brown, not blue. _

_Alice's mother sighed. "Cynthia, don't make this hard. Come along now, Mary."_

_She took Alice's hand and practically dragged her into a large gray building. Alice tried desperately to twist around to see Cynthia one last time but the man that looked like her dad had carried the little girl back into a car._

_The building Alice was being dragged into looked like a church, but the atmosphere was too dismal and menacing for that._

_The interior of the structure matched the outside perfectly. The floors were made of cold cement and the walls were painted with a moldy off-white colour that was peeling in some places. A reception desk in the middle of the room had three people standing around it, looking at a calendar that read January 31st, 1928. There was horrible lighting inside, casting eerie shadows on the faces of the nurses who took Alice from her mom and held her down on a cot. _

"_Goodbye, Mary." _

_Alice's mom gave her daughter one last kiss on the forehead and, with a pained expression, walked out the door and out of Alice's life forever. _

"_Mommy! MOMMY! DON'T LEAVE ME!" Alice was shrieking hysterically. _

_One of the nurses injected a needle into Alice's arm and her body went limp._

The sound of Alice's screams echoed inside my head and it wasn't until she put her arms around me that I realized I was shaking.

"Kelly?" she asked softly, in a voice so different than the one I'd just heard. "What did you see?"

I exchanged a glance with Edward; sure he'd seen the same thing I did. One look at his dazed expression and I could tell that he did.

"Uh," I croaked, "not much…"

Alice looked to Edward, whose face had returned to normal. "Edward, what did she see?"

"She saw when you were admitted to the asylum. January 31st, 1928. You were thirteen at the time."

"Is…is that all?" she asked, looking unsure of herself.

"Why do you ask?"

"Because you two look like you just saw a bag of kittens being stepped on."

Yeah. Something like that.

"Edward, I'm exhausted. Let's go back home okay?" I said, trying to change the subject.

Edward nodded and started up the car, simultaneously closing the windows. The drive home was a quiet one and for once, I was glad to be a vampire. At least there were no tears to give away any clues as to how I was feeling. Because I was feeling pretty darn awful. Once, I caught Jasper's eyes in the rearview mirror and he gave me a look that was like, 'I know you're hiding something.'

When we got out of the car Alice grabbed my hand and pulled me aside.

"I hope you're not keeping anything from me, because it's my past and I deserve to know," she said while searching my eyes with hers. I felt the need to look away but I stared back.

"I know you do, and I'm not."

Alice stared some more, as if she were trying to detect the lie, but finally let me go.

"Okay then."

As we walked up the steps leading to the house, I suddenly got the sense that something wasn't right. I wasn't the only one. Alice, Jasper and Edward all froze in place too. Edward's eyes suddenly widened and he glanced nervously at me. He moved to block me from the door and started saying something about us going hunting, but I knew he was just trying to distract me from something. I could _feel _another presence in the house, another brain full of memories. Maybe the Cullens were just having a visitor, like Eleazar, in which case I wouldn't care, but the memories were of _me. _

There was me standing in a line with Cammie in ice skates, me arguing with Lex while Cammie and Kevin looked on, me walking through dark, snow-covered woods, one hand over my eye, the other in my pocket. I knew who these memories belonged to.

Pushing Edward aside gently—at least, I meant to do it gently, but I was still a newborn, remember?—I ran toward the door and slammed it open, making a crack appear in the side of it. I would have to apologize to Esme for that later.

I had no trouble finding him. Sitting on the white couch with his crimson eyes and blonde hair, Fire Eyes stuck out like a sore thumb.

* * *

**Please review. :)**


	10. Reunion

**10. Reunion.**

Ice gripped my entire body as my brain registered the sight of Fire Eyes on the familiar white couch. As soon as he saw me, he shot right off of it. Just seeing him made my fists clench and my body shake. How _dare _he show his face here! I was about ready to tear his throat out when Edward and Jasper gripped my arms on both sides.

"What are you doing? Let go of me!" I snapped.

"We can't do that, Kelly," Edward said in a grim voice, "not unless you swear not to hurt him."

My eyes widened in disbelief. "Do you have any idea who that is?" I said, in a pitch that should have broken windows. "That's the guy who tore me away from my human life! _He _bit_ me_! And you don't want me to hurt _him_?"

I had never screamed so loud in my life.

"Edward. Jasper. Maybe it would be a good idea to take her outside for some fresh air so she can…calm down." Carlisle cast me an apologetic glance, which I ignored. Instead, I fought harder to escape Edward and Jasper's grasp. I almost made it, too, if it weren't for the wave of lethargy that washed over me courtesy of Jasper.

I saw Alice's face and internally sighed in relief. At least she would take my side. She would talk some sense into the rest of the Cullens and allow me to do what I had vowed to do so many weeks ago.

But Alice wasn't talking. And she was avoiding my gaze. And she was holding the door open for us. What was she doing?

Edward was now single-handedly carrying me, running full speed in the direction of the trees. I felt uncomfortable and awkward in his arms. I tried twisting out of his grip but Jasper sedated me again. When Edward finally stopped running, I leaped out of his arms and scowled at Jasper. The lethargy left my system and the flaming anger immediately came back. I couldn't contain it any longer. It felt like a bottle of soda that someone had been shaking over and over and I was ready to blow. I let out a scream that scared even me. I lashed out at the nearest tree and sent its branches flying all over the place. That wasn't enough. I kicked at the same tree and sent it toppling over. Still not enough. For the next who-knows-how-long, I scratched and kicked and pretty much destroyed every tree within a ten foot radius. When I finally stopped, I took in all the damage I'd done. Tree branches and leaves littered the forest floor, tree stumps jutting out from the earth in ugly and unnatural ways. I was disgusted with myself.

A hand placed itself onto my shoulder and I turned to see Alice looking at me with concern. "Are you okay?"

I felt something bubbling in the pit of my stomach. Anger, hurt, betrayal.

"No," I said, "I'm not okay. What kind of question is that?" And suddenly I was yelling. "How could you do that to me, Alice? That guy RUINED my life and you're _protecting _him from me? I thought you were my friend!"

"Kelly! Of course I'm your friend, it's just—"

"What? It's just what? You're just a two-faced liar who can't do anything but _shop_?"

Alice looked like she'd just been slapped in the face. Jasper blocked her from me.

"Lay off her, will you?" he growled, which made me growl.

"Enough! Both of you!" Carlisle's (where did he come from?) voice sounded mad, which wasn't like him at all, so he must've been _really _upset. I took a step away from everyone and crossed my arms. I was still shaking. Carlisle turned to me, his gaze softening.

"Kelly, I think you should know more about—"

"No!" I slapped my hands over my ears. "Don't say his name. I don't want to know his name! I don't want to know anything about him."

"But Kelly—"

"SHUT UP!"

With one last frustrated shout, I sprinted away from the Cullens. Again. _They must be getting sick of me running away all the time,_ I thought. But I kept pushing on, cutting through the tree branches that reached out to stop me.

I didn't mean to keep track of time, but somehow I knew I'd been running for four hours and forty-five minutes. While I was running I had been staring at the ground the whole time but now I looked up. I wasn't surprised to see the bright lights and skyscrapers of my beloved city. I guess, in the back of my mind this had always been my destination. Since I left, all I had wanted was to come home.

"Hi New York," I whispered miserably. The distant wail of an ambulance answered my greeting.

I wandered around aimlessly for a while, visiting all the places that had been familiar to me my entire life. First stop: school. Seeing the big brown building made my heart ache. I was only 5 months away from graduating. Now I'd never get the chance.

The school was empty but all the lights were on. This was something that had always annoyed me and my friends. Had they never heard of saving energy? I climbed over the black gates easily and made my way into the building. The lobby of the school was brightly lit, with a reception desk at the far right of the room. A security guard was at the desk, snoring peacefully. The corner of my mouth lifted slightly. That was Mr. Lockhart, the head security guard, who had been here since before I was born. I knew my practice with Alice was paying off, because even though his scent bothered me, I was able to handle it. Sort of.

I walked away before I could push my limits. And I stopped. There, so big I don't know how I didn't see it immediately, was a blown up picture of me on the lobby wall. Unlike on the news, this picture wasn't of me smiling uncomfortably for a school photo; this one was of me in Central Park. It was summer in the picture. I was sitting cross-legged on a picnic blanket in a mock-yoga pose, smiling slightly, eyes closed. I remembered that day perfectly.

"_You were supposed to bring the chicken sandwiches, idiot!" Lex yelled at her brother. _

"_No…if I remember correctly, you said _you _would bring the chicken sandwiches and I would bring the potato salad."Kevin said patronizingly. _

"_It's okay Lex," Cammie said, looking amused, "those sandwiches weren't that great anyway." _

_Lex looked hurt. "I made those sandwiches!" _

"_Oh. Forget what I just said then."_

"_Guys, guys, relax…" I tried saying in a soothing voice. "Let's all just calm down, and enjoy this beautiful summer day."_

_I placed both my hands on my knees and joined my middle fingers with my thumbs in that way people do when they meditate. Behind my eyelids, I saw a flash of light. My eyes snapped open to the sight of Kevin's best friend Ryan (an aspiring photographer) grinning at me from behind his camera. _

"_That was a perfect shot!" he exclaimed._

"_No, really," he said when I rolled my eyes, "the sun was like, right above you so it looks like you're bathed in sunshine." _

_I looked over his shoulder to see the picture and had to admit I looked kinda good._

"_God, Ry, you're so cheesy," Kevin laughed through a mouthful of potato salad. _

"_Speaking of cheese, you didn't bring the macaroni either!" Lex started up again. _

_Kevin groaned. "Get off my case, woman."_

I blinked. Other than the ongoing sibling rivalry between Lex and Kevin, that day really had been great. Ryan brought water guns and we had a game of water-tag, then we had a competition to see who could do the most cartwheels in a row without getting dizzy.

Under my picture, there were bouquets of flowers, teddy bears, cards, balloons, unlit candles and more pictures. Was this…a tribute? Slowly, I kneeled down to examine one of the cards. I recognized Kevin's handwriting.

_Kelly was a sweet, caring funny friend. For nine years, she was like a sister to me, and now I just can't believe she's gone. I'll miss her more than she'll ever know. _

_Kelly, I love you. Rest in peace._

—_Kevin Paulson._

Choking back a sob, I stood up and ran out of the school, not wanting to read any more. I didn't know whether to feel touched or…what. I was so confused. Was this a good thing? That they all thought I was dead? I don't know. I don't know…

I was walking along First Avenue—which was strangely deserted—when a woman called out to me.

"Hey! You're that girl…from the news!" she said, eyes wide.

"What?" I played dumb, though inside I was kicking myself for not being more careful.

"The girl…oh gosh, what's her name? Shelly something? Shelly Folker?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." I said curtly, trying to walk past, but the woman suddenly yelled over my shoulder.

"Officer! She's the girl! Shelly—"

I clamped my hand over her mouth and looked behind me. A police officer was just walking out of a donut shop. Fortunately, he had earphones on so he hadn't heard her. I gave the woman a death glare and hissed a warning in her ear to shut up before releasing my hold on her. That, however, turned out to be a mistake when she started screaming.

I panicked. The cop was looking in our direction now, frowning. He started toward us asking what was wrong.

No, no, no, go away!

I made a split second decision that was less than…civilized. I kicked him in his 'manhood' and sent him sprawling. The woman was now staring at me in horror. That was the last look she was ever going to wear because I dragged her into a dark corner and sank my teeth into her neck. Oh, how much better human blood was than animal blood! I drank in the life of the woman who was going to rat me out. Her blood was so warm and inviting—

Something in my brain snapped back in place and I shoved the woman away from me, but it was too late. She was drained. Dead.

Now it was my turn to stare in horror. What had I done? Ten feet to my right I heard a pained groan as someone got to their feet. I said a very bad four-letter word and climbed a nearby fire escape to…well, escape the policeman. He rounded the corner and stumbled when he saw the lifeless body of the woman. His eyes widened and he fumbled for his walkie-talkie. He barked some orders in it but I wasn't listening. I was too busy hating myself. What the _hell _did I just do? All of that time spent practicing with Alice…gone to waste. I flinched at the thought of seeing any of the Cullens again. After the way I'd yelled at Alice and Carlisle…I wouldn't be surprised if they never wanted to see me again. But I had to go back. I knew that in my heart. After all they'd done for me, I couldn't just…leave. I wasn't raised that way. I had to at least say thank you, right? I really didn't want to, but 18 years of my mom teaching me proper etiquette wouldn't let me _not _do it. Plus, I couldn't stay in New York. Too many people would recognize me, and who knows who else I'd kill?

Reluctantly, I got up from the fire escape and jumped off. I landed without a sound, so the cop didn't notice me at all. I ran the other way, toward the west coast. I stopped once in Pennsylvania because I caught sight of myself in a mirror on a parked car. My heart sank when I saw that my eyes had gone back to the violent red that I despised.

During the time that I had abstained from human blood, my eyes had ever so slightly changed. A colour like amber was making its way from my pupils out. But that was gone now. Now I looked just as I had when I woke up.

I felt embarrassed and ashamed when I thought about having to face the Cullens with these crimson eyes of mine. They would judge me, and Jacob would jump on this chance to throw me out. I'd broken the six-month deal. I was done for.

I spent five days in the sleepy state of Pennsylvania, drinking as much animal blood as I could hold to dilute the human blood. I must have drunk a million gallons of the stuff, but nothing happened. It was so unfair how it took so long to build up something good, and only a second to destroy it. I finally stopped stalling and ran straight to Forks, Washington.

When I reached the Cullen house, I was greeted with the sight of Alice sitting on the porch steps. When she saw me she jumped up and immediately enveloped me in her arms.

"I'm so sorry about what you had to do in New York," she whispered.

I shook my head. "No, I'm sorry about the nasty things I said to you. I didn't mean any of it, I swear!"

Alice smiled sadly at me. "I know you didn't. It was my fault. You felt hurt that I would stop you from harming Tristan."

I froze. "Who?"

Alice seemed to realize her slip-up. "Uh…Tristan. Tristan Cains. That's his name, Kelly," she said cautiously.

I concentrated on breathing in and out to control my temper.

"Oh," was all I said.

"Hey, let's go inside!" she said with exaggerated enthusiasm, trying to change the subject. "Everyone really missed you."

She took my hand and led me inside the white house. Nessie, who was sitting on Bella's lap, ran over and gave me a hug when she saw me walk through the door.

"Why did you leave?" she asked.

"I just…needed to think." I answered, sheepish.

"Well don't think again, okay?"

I laughed. "Okay."

I looked around the room to see all the Cullens seated around the living room (no Fire Eyes in sight). I waved timidly. "Hi all."

"Hey Kels!" Emmett grinned. "Don't worry, we don't hate you!"

I smiled gratefully at him before locking eyes with Carlisle. I was most worried about what he thought. I mean, I had told him to shut up! I had to apologize.

"Carlisle, I'm so sorry about—"

"Don't worry about it," he cut me off, with a reassuring wave. "I understand completely."

Suddenly I realized someone was missing. Two someones, actually.

"Jacob is in La Push," Edward answered my unasked question.

"And Jasper?" I asked.

"Hunting."

I found it weird that Jasper would go hunting alone, but decided not to push it. There was still an uncomfortable air around the room. I was still hurt about the Fire Eyes thing, and no doubt the Cullens had lost some respect for me during my little tantrum.

"Kelly, no! That's not it at all," Edward assured me. "It's just…the pack is mad at us again."

I tensed. Had the tribe somehow found out I killed another human? How could they? That happened on the other side of the country. I felt all of their eyes look into mine, and I didn't need Edward's power to know that they all noticed that my eyes had changed.

"No, we didn't tell Jacob about that. That'll be just between us."

"Then why are they mad?"

Nessie was the one who answered me. "Jake's angry that we're adding another member to our newborn motel. His words, not mine."

"Wait, he's staying? You're letting him stay?" I glared accusingly at Edward, who raised his hands defensively.

"He has nowhere else to go! And he's a vegetarian, so…"

"Well where did he stay between January 10th and now? He can damn well go back!" I was starting to yell again.

"He was with the Denali coven, but that didn't work out…" Edward ran his hand through his unruly hair, looking uncomfortable.

I felt hurt and betrayal boiling in my stomach again. I can't believe Edward was defending the one person I truly hated. Hated with all the fibers of my being. Edward looked like he was about to say something, but just then, Jasper climbed in through the window. Followed by Fire Eyes.

I hate to admit it, but the first thing that registered in my head was how breathtakingly gorgeous Fire Eyes was. He was wearing faded blue jeans and a green sweater. Under other circumstances, this would have been funny, because I was wearing blue jeans and a green t-shirt, but no one was laughing now. I noticed his eyes looked different than the last time I saw them. They were almost the same colour as the Cullens' except for a ring of campfire orangeness around the edges of his irises.

"Hello."

His voice brought me back to my senses. I narrowed my eyes and growled at him. All of my muscles were tensed, ready to attack, but before I could do anything rash, I turned around and walked with controlled steps, toward the back door. Only when I was outdoors, did I break out into a run. I stopped when I reached the woods, and sat down with my back against a tree. I was so mad I felt like pulling my hair out. I felt like breaking something. To keep from chopping down the forest, I grabbed a handful of rocks and squeezed until nothing was left of them but dust.

Okay, Kelly, I thought to myself. What are your options? One: I could run away again…no. That was out. I had already used up my share of storming-out. Two: Kill Fire Eyes like I intended to do in the first place…no. The Cullens had made it clear that he was not to be touched. And I knew that if I killed him, they would be very disappointed with me. And I didn't want that. Ugh, why did I care so much about what they thought? Suddenly my brain answered my own question. Because I loved them. I loved them like my own family.

"Kelly? May I join you?"

I looked up to find Alice standing a few feet away.

"Yeah, sure."

Alice silently made her way to the other side of the tree trunk and slid down. She had something in her hand but it was hidden from my view.

"So…" she said.

"So?"

"Anything you want to talk to me about?"

"Nope, nothing. Everything in my life has been going perfectly, actually." I replied, staring at the small pile of rock dust at my feet.

Alice raised her eyebrows at me.

I sighed. "Okay, fine. What do you want to know?"

"Just anything you feel like telling me," she shrugged.

"Well, something has been bothering me…"

"Tell me about it."

"Why does Emmett always lose at Guitar Hero when he's had more practice than me?"

Alice laughed. "That's a mystery to me too."

We stayed silent for a while after that. I continued crushing rocks, though most of my anger had dissipated, while Alice watched the sun set over the horizon. Suddenly I got the urge to talk about what I did in New York.

"That time was different than the others," I said. I didn't need to explain what I was talking about, Alice seemed to already know. "It was the first time that I consciously _decided _to do it. I mean sure, I decided to kill Carl too, but that was before I'd been practicing to be around human blood. And he was a pedophile anyway. Not that that excuses what I did, of course. But with that woman…I didn't even need her. Yes, she smelled delicious, and yes, I wanted her blood, but I didn't need it. Not like I needed Carl's or the businessman's. I had control but…I threw it away."

Alice nodded, not saying a word.

"Have you ever killed anybody?" I asked.

She nodded. "I've fallen off the wagon a few times. We all have. Well, except for Carlisle and Rose and Bella. But we don't judge each other because of it. We all understand what it's like to be subject to that awful thirst. You have nothing to worry about, Kelly. We have your back, always."

"Thanks, Alice."

"Oh! Almost forgot. Here," she held her hand out to me, the one with something in it. It took me a second to realize it was my sister's beanie. The beanie I was wearing on my last night as a human! I snatched it from Alice's hand and hugged it to my chest. "Alice, where did you get this?"

"Tris—uh…what do you call him? Fire Eyes? He gave it to me to give to you."

Part of me wanted to throw the hat away and stomp on it, but a bigger part made me hug it even tighter. Finally. Something from my old life to cling on to.

"Should we head back?" Alice asked me.

"I—I don't know if I'd be able to control myself," I admitted.

Alice smiled kindly at me. "I'll be by your side at all times, I promise."

Reluctantly, I got up and followed Alice back to the house. Fire Eyes was sitting on the couch again, listening to Nessie as she talked to him about how her parents met (she seemed to like telling people that story). Jacob was still nowhere in sight.

As Alice and I made our way to the dining room, I felt his eyes on me the whole time, but I avoided looking at him as all that seemed to do was spike my anger.

Edward, Bella, Carlisle and Jasper were seated at the dining table. Alice sat next to Jasper and I sat next to her.

Edward cleared his throat. "Ness just made Tris—I mean, Fire Eyes—"

"No, it's okay," I interrupted. "You can say his name. I'm not _that _childish…anymore."

"Okay then. Ness just made Tristan listen to her iPod so we can talk."

"So…where's he gonna stay?" I asked, though I knew the answer.

"Here," Carlisle said.

"Okay, sure. Where am I going to stay, then?"

Carlisle looked perplexed. "Here, of course. Just like you have been for the past month and a half."

"Carlisle, I can't live in the same house as him. I can't. That's just a recipe for disaster."

"She's right, Carlisle. The emotions that come off of her when she's around him, it's almost too much to bear." Jasper said. I bit my lip when I thought of all I'd put poor Jasper through.

Bella, who had been silently listening to us, spoke up. "Edward, if you don't mind, maybe she could stay at our house? If you want," she directed that last bit to me.

To be honest, I wasn't sure if I did. Every morning when Nessie came over to the main house, Edward and Bella were always a few minutes behind, and it was no secret to anyone what they were doing in those few minutes.

I coughed awkwardly.

Edward coughed awkwardly.

"Um, I don't know…" I began, but Alice interrupted me.

"She's going to say yes."

"Great!" Bella clapped her hands together, momentarily looking a lot like Esme. "I'll go tell Ness the good news. She'll be so happy."

I looked uneasily at Edward.

_Oh well. As long as I'm not under the same roof as Tristan Cains, right? _


	11. Persuasion

**After 3 months of not posting, I finally come up with this short chapter... I know, I know, I suck. **

**Disclaimer: No ownage from me.**

* * *

**11. Persuasion**

Esme tapped me on the shoulder. "Kelly, could you pass me the potatoes?"

"Here," I said, handing her a big bowl of perfectly peeled and chopped potatoes. She dropped them into a pot of boiling water and put a lid on it with one hand while opening the oven door and pulling out a chocolate cake with the other.

This food wasn't for us, of course. Esme was cooking for the Homeless Haven of Washington. After watching a documentary about poverty in America, she'd immediately rushed off to the kitchen to 'fulfill her American duties.' She had called me at Edward and Bella's house to help her, and the only reason I came was because she assured me that Tristan was out hunting with Jasper. This was the first time I had been back at the main house in a week, and much to Emmett's disappointment, it wasn't to play video games.

"Mm, that's good," Nessie was licking her fingers. After one glance at the cake, I could tell she had swiped off some frosting. I envied that she could still eat human food. I missed chocolate.

"Nessie, that's not for you!" Esme chastised half-heartedly. She pushed a bowl of home-made frosting in front of her. "Here, put some more on the cake, then you can have the rest."

The next half hour passed with Esme, Bella and me running around the kitchen chopping, peeling and mixing various ingredients. Right as we were finishing up, Nessie ran into the kitchen, eyes wide in excitement.

"It's snowing!" she squealed, grabbing my and Bella's hands and pulling us outside. Sure enough, snow was falling all around, already blanketing every possible surface. How was it possible to have this much snow in March?

Something hit me in the back of my head and I cried out in surprise. I spun around to see that Emmett was suppressing a laugh. A snowball fight ensued, with me, Edward, Nessie, Alice, and Carlisle on one side, and Emmett, Bella, Rosalie and Esme on the other. Our group had awesome teamwork. While Edward, Carlisle and I were building a fort to defend ourselves, Nessie and Alice were on the offensive, chucking snowballs like there was no tomorrow. The highlight of the fight was when Nessie threw a snowball into Emmett's mouth while he was laughing. That led to him destroying our fort and carrying Ness over his shoulder caveman style. Everyone was doubled over in hysterics as Nessie tried to free herself from Emmett's iron grip.

We could've gone on forever, but Jasper decided to bring Tristan back at that moment, instantly killing the mood. I straightened up and felt Edward and Emmett's hands on my arms. They did it almost without thinking now. It was kind of funny…but not really.

"Don't worry, guys," I murmured, gently shaking them off of me, "I'll just be back at the cottage."

I had taken about two steps when a voice I had only heard once called out to me.

"Wait," it could only be one person, and that person had a British accent, "can I talk to you for a second?"

"Uh, I don't think that's a good idea, Tristan," Edward said.

"Just for a second. Please? You and Emmett can stay here," Tristan pleaded.

Edward sighed and looked at the others, as if for advice. Finally, he relented. Everyone except for Edward, Emmett, Tristan and me went back in the house. On her way in, Nessie gave me an encouraging thumbs up.

Tristan cleared his throat uncomfortably before talking. "Look, I know you hate me and can't stand to be in the same room as me, but just hear me out."

I didn't interrupt.

"I'm sorry about what I did to you, I really am. I never meant to do it, I swear. Remember when I first saw you? I was going to...bite you right then, but I managed to control myself. Which was really surprising since I was a newborn, and Edward says you were my um, singer," Tristan was staring hard at the ground and wouldn't stop fidgeting with the hair at the back of his head.

My eyes widened and I turned to Edward. Singer? _As in, how Bella was your singer? _I asked him. He nodded grimly.

Memories of what Tristan experienced when he caught my scent made me flinch, much to my embarrassment, since he was watching me. His eyes were so sad and pleading, much like on that first night when he silently apologized to me. And like that first night, I wanted to hug him, but I crossed my arms and clenched my jaws together. Get a grip, Kelly.

"Anyway," Tristan's eyes were back on the ground. "I tried getting away. I hid in those trees. But you came back for that stupid bus card. The wind was blowing my way, and I — I just couldn't…I'm so sorry, Kelly."

Something was wrong. I felt myself give in to him, starting to forgive him. But that wasn't right! Deep in my gut, I was still furious. I wasn't just going to say "Oh it's fine!" because he said some pretty words. I had just opened my mouth to give him a piece of my mind, when Edward reached out to grip my shoulder and Alice came running out of the house.

"Kelly, get in the house right now! Rose is waiting for you with some contacts. Put them on. Hurry!" Alice shoved me in the direction of the door before I could respond. My feet automatically led me to the downstairs bathroom where I knew Rosalie was pacing around, contacts in hand, just like Alice said.

"What's going on?" I asked as she placed the two discs into my eyes.

"The wolves are coming. All of them," Rosalie answered in an ominous tone.

My breathing quickened unnecessarily as the meaning of this sunk in. Jacob and his gang were coming here in full force. Probably to tear either me or Tristan to shreds. Or both of us. I was hoping they'd choose Tristan.

"There," said Rosalie. "The contacts are brown, so hopefully they muddy down your eyes enough to fool the dogs. In about thirty minutes, the venom in your eyes will dissolve the things, so come back in here to replace them."

I stared at my reflection in horror. I had venom in my eyes? What the _hell_? But Rose was right. The brown of the contacts mixed with the red of my irises made my eyes look like a muddy sort of orange muck. Eugh. At least they hid the evidence.

The tribe was assembled outside the house. Everyone aside for Jacob, Sam and Seth were phased. Seth gave me a small wave, which caused a grey wolf at his side – probably Leah – to semi-violently push him with her snout. I smiled at Seth, not bothering to hide it. What was there to hide anyway? Maybe if the others saw that he and I were on good terms, they'd realize that I wasn't that bad.

My smile had the opposite effect however, since Jacob only glared at Seth. Then he directed his gaze to our direction. "Look, Cullens. I know we've been through a hell of a lot together, and that we're kinda friends, but now you're just freakin' testing us. We were willing to let you off the hook with Kelly, but now another one? They're the reason the La Push kids are phasing earlier and earlier! Those two, they need to go now."

"Hey!" I shouted indignantly, "Do _not _group me in with him! He's the reasons I'm here in the first place. And what's up with you? You were fine with me being here before he came along! What about the six month deal, huh? It's not over yet."

"What do you mean he's the reason you're here?" Jacob asked.

"I mean," I said slowly, patronizingly, "that he's the one who turned me into this _thing_."

"You're not a thing, Kelly. Don't say that." Renesmee piped up from behind me, frowning.

Jacob seemed to forget his anger for a moment when he caught sight of Nessie. He broke out into a smile and took a step toward her. Ness went over to hug him. She put her hand to his cheek and looked him seriously in the eye. Jacob stiffened and stared at me. Not in such a hateful way anymore, but more like he was sizing me up. I nudged Edward. _What did she say to him? What's he thinking? _Edward just shook his head slightly and gave me a look that said he'd tell me later.

Jacob put Nessie down. "I'm sorry Ness, but it doesn't matter if they're vegetarians or not, just their presence is a danger to the reservation kids."

"But Jake—"

"Jacob, I'm sorry if I don't quite understand, but isn't it a good thing if the kids from your tribe phase earlier? Isn't it a good thing that there are more of you, in case real danger comes?" Tristan inquired, interrupting Nessie.

It looked like Jacob was at a loss for words at the moment, so Tristan continued talking before Jacob could find his voice again.

"I really respect you guys for being so protective of your people, but I'm telling you: I'm absolutely no danger. In fact, why don't you give me the same six-month deal that you gave Kelly? That would only be fair, wouldn't it?"

The pack all started nodding to each other, and nudging Jacob and Sam, indicating that they thought this was a good idea. I'm pretty sure I looked pretty ridiculous as I stared, open-mouthed at Tristan. How did he do that? With his persuasive words, and smooth accent, he reminded me of a politician. I realized, for the first time, that he had a self-assured, cunning air about him. I hadn't noticed before because I was too busy…well, planning his death, but now it was all I could see. The sad, remorseful boy I saw while he was apologizing to me earlier was gone, replaced by this smug, confident man. I no longer felt the need to comfort him. Slap him was more like it.

Finally, after conferring with Sam and Seth, Jacob turned to Tristan and said in a confused voice, "I guess we'll let you stay here for six months and see how it goes. Um…yeah. Don't do anything to make us regret this."

Now I wasn't the only person staring incredulously at Tristan. The rest of the Cullens were doing so as well.

Tristan broke into a grin. "Thanks so much. You guys should go home and rest now, after such an exciting day, yeah?"

A few of the wolves vaguely nodded and trotted away, as if in a daze. The three who were still in human form mumbled "Yeah," phased, and ran to join their comrades.

"Okay, _what_ was that?!" Rosalie demanded of Tristan.

"Yeah man, how'd you do that?" Emmett joined in, clapping Tristan on the back.

Tristan was once again just a shy boy. The politician was gone. He glanced over at Edward sheepishly. "You already know, don't you?"

Edward half-smiled, "Yeah."

"Well?" Alice raised an eyebrow at him. "What is it?"

Edward smiled for real now. "We have another talented vampire in the house."


	12. Remembering

**Hey there. Well. Not as speedy of an update as I would've liked, but hey, at least it didn't take me three months this time. ;) Since I last updated, I got a little bit sick…Some advice: Don't throw up in school. It's embarrassing, it's inconvenient…and it's just not cool. O.O**

**On that pleasant note, on with the story! :P**

**Disclaimer: You know that I know that you know that I don't own Twilight.**

* * *

**12. Remembering**

There was a brief silence as Edward's words sank in. Then, as if someone had suddenly turned on the volume, the room erupted with whoops and cheers and everyone was asking Tristan exactly what his power was and how he got it. Everyone except me, that is. Now I knew why I had been tempted to forgive him earlier, and why the wolves had caved in so easily to his little proposal. I was fuming.

"Okay, okay, everyone give Tristan some space," Carlisle laughed, "why don't we all sit down and hear his story?"

I wanted to leave and go hunting or something, but two firm hands placed themselves on either side of my shoulders and steered me to the couch. I looked behind me to glare at whoever was subjecting me to this heinous torture. Edward. Should've known. He sat me down between himself and Emmett so that escape was impossible. I crossed my arms and glared at him. I refused to look at Tristan, even though I could feel his eyes burning their way through my skin. An image of me, laughing and joking with Cammie while we were in line for the hot chocolate danced around inside my mind, and I glanced sharply at the owner of the memory. Tristan bit his lip sheepishly and the image disappeared.

"So," Bella said, "were you very persuasive as a human?"

Tristan smiled shyly, "I suppose you could say that."

After some more prompting, he finally explained that in high school—or "secondary school" as he called it—he was captain of the debate team and that he led his team to win a bunch of competitions.

"Then there was this really prestigious contest, where you could get a full scholarship to any university of your choice, you just had to write an essay on why you think you deserved it." He said softly. "So I wrote the essay…and I got picked. After that I went to Oxford University and studied to become a lawyer."

"He's not telling us the whole story," Edward grinned, suddenly, "Tristan, you seem to have let slip that you won every mock-trial that you were given. Even when you were representing the bad guy. Would you like to tell us more about that?"

Tristan ducked his head. He looked like he would blush if he could. "Um, yeah. This law firm in London offered me an internship, even though I was only in my second year."

He said all of this while looking as if he were embarrassed. He had gone back to being like that sweet-looking little boy, and it was hard to stay mad at him. My scowl had vanished as soon as he mentioned law. My sister, Natalie, was in her third year of college, studying to be a lawyer too. A pang went through my chest as I realized we were in the same state. She was in Seattle University and Seattle is in Washington. Forks is in Washington. I wanted to see her.

Edward nudged my ribs, trying to make me focus on the present, but I couldn't. I was filled with a strong urge to see my sister. Hug her. Tell her I miss her. The emotions were so overwhelming that I got up and excused myself. I needed air. If not to live, then to clear my head. I mentally assured Edward that I was just going to take a walk, and I got out of there.

I hadn't even taken ten steps out the door when I heard soft footsteps behind me. I turned to find Tristan a few paces behind me, hands in pockets and hair covering a bit of his eyes. The anger that always came when I looked at him or even thought about him came back. I noticed it wasn't as strong as before. It was probably subdued by my longing to see Natalie.

Taking deep breaths to calm myself, I asked him a brilliant question. "What?"

"Edward told me…about your sister—"

"No," I interrupted him, "stop right there. You don't get to talk to me about my sister. Understand?"

Tristan sighed. "Okay. Sorry."

I turned on my heel to walk away but his next words made me stop.

"You know," he said, "When I first saw you laughing with your friend at the rink…aside from wanting to drink your blood…I was thinking that it'd be nice if we were friends. You know, because you had a nice smile, nice laugh. So if you would please forgive me—not right now of course, but sometime this decade…"

I felt a tingle in my chest, a sort of warmth, and realized it wasn't the first time I got that feeling while Tristan was talking to me. I recognized it now. "Look," I snapped, "I know what you're trying to do, but you should know that if you try to use your 'powers' on me one more time, I will snap you in half."

"Oh, I didn't know I was doing anything," he actually looked genuinely surprised. "I guess it comes naturally. You have to believe me though. I wasn't trying to _do_ anything. I mean, when I said those things to the wolves, yeah, I was consciously using my uh, 'gift', but I wasn't trying to manipulate _you_ in any way. I promise."

Well. I didn't know how to reply to that so I simply said, "If you know what's good for you, you'll leave me alone."

I went the opposite direction before he could say anything, feeling weird. Pre-vampirization, I never threatened anyone, and if I did, it was just as a joke. Now it seemed I was doing it every few seconds. What would my parent think if they could see me now? What would Natalie think? Lex and Kevin? Cammie?

_That's why you can never see them again, idiot. They'd think you were some kind of freaky leech-person._

Of course. I was stupid to want to see Nat again. I was stupid to think that she'd _want_ to see me again. I dropped my head into my hands and cried that strange, dry vampire cry. I hoped that no one would come to fetch me, because I really needed to do this. I needed to properly say goodbye to my old life and accept this new one. This new life in which I would never get older than eighteen. I would never graduate high school and get into college. I would never be the maid of honor at the wedding my sister or Lex or Cammie were going to have some day. I'd never meet a man of my own and get married and have children. Grandchildren.

Long after I stopped crying, the list of things I'd never get to do was still being written in my brain. I forced myself to stop, and think of the good things that a _vampire_ life brings. There were the super-enhanced senses, of course, which was pretty cool. The speed, the memory thing…oh, and being beautiful. But the most important thing that a vampire life gave me…the Cullens. I half-smiled to myself, knowing that with them by my side, the side effects of this life might just be bearable.

* * *

"Kelly, you're just in time! We're about to watch 'Anastasia'." Alice said as I walked in Bella and Edward's cottage. She was sitting on the living room couch, which was a warm brown instead of the creamy white of the main house. Nessie was sitting to Alice's right, digging through a bowl of popcorn.

I raised an eyebrow, "That movie where the girl loses her memory?"

"Yeah. Ironic huh? She should've just called you!" Nessie said before Alice could reply. I laughed and joined them on the couch. We were about twenty minutes into the movie when my brain throbbed, followed by—

_Alice. About fifteen or sixteen years old this time. Her hair was long, it passed her shoulder blades, and it was dirty. Slightly limp. In fact, everything about this Alice was slightly limp. She was slumped against the wall of her room—if you could call it a room. It was barely big enough to hold the single bed and small, square table in there—and staring at the opposite wall. There was no sunlight in the room. The only source of light came from a very dim bulb that hung overhead. Alice's eyes were unfocused and glazed over. Her fingers absently traced a pattern on her bed sheet. _

_A man opened the heavy door with a tray of food in his hands. He didn't say a word as he placed the tray on the end of the bed and quickly stepped away. Before he closed the door, Alice called out to him without looking away from the wall._

"_Do I have any letters?" _

_The man sighed. He came back in the room but didn't make any eye contact. _

"_Ms. Brandon. For the past year, you've asked me this question. The answer is, and will always be no. Stop asking."_

"_I'm getting one," Alice said, still gazing at the wall, "someday." _

_The man rolled his eyes, but I caught a glint of uncertainty in them. He left the room quickly, leaving Alice all alone again. The light bulb gave a last flicker and then everything went dark._

I blinked and looked sideways at Alice. She didn't seem to notice that anything was wrong. She and Ness were too engrossed in the movie. No matter how much I tried, I just couldn't shake the image of a skinny, sickly Alice out of my mind. She looked so miserable in that asylum. Her family didn't even visit her or write to her. The way she was sitting in that memory, it was as if she wasn't ever going anywhere else.

Oh, Alice. How did you get out?

* * *

We were back at the main house now and Jacob was coming over, so I was told to put in the contacts. When he walked in the door and scowled at me, I didn't even have the energy to scowl back. I already had Tristan to think about, I couldn't be continuously hostile to two people at the same time. Jacob seemed to be taken off-guard by my passive behavior. He talked and played with Nessie as usual, but every so often he'd glance over at me nervously, as if expecting me to pounce on him.

I was reading a book on a chair across the room from Jacob, so he really shouldn't have been paranoid. I shook my head slightly to clear it, put down the book and looked around me to take note of where everyone was. Carlisle was at the hospital, Rose and Emmett had gone on a mini-vacation somewhere, Edward was at the piano, Bella was helping Esme with some cooking—that documentary had _really_ had an effect on her—and I didn't know where the rest were. Jasper and Alice and Tristan. Alice and Jasper were possibly catching up on their couple time, but that wouldn't explain Tristan's disappearance. _Oh my God, maybe he left. That would be awesome_. Edward shot me a disapproving look. I shrugged.

Maybe Alice was on her own somewhere, organizing some person's closet, and Jasper and Tristan were doing something together. Those two had become really close over the past few weeks. Everyone else was happy about that, but it annoyed me to no end. A friend for Tristan meant a reason for him to stay.

Alice materialized in front of me without warning and smiled. "Wanna go to Port Angeles? We haven't been there in a while."

"Uh, sure. Hey, where were you?" I asked, curious.

"Oh," Alice waved her hand in a vague circle, "I was updating Bella's closet."

From the kitchen, I heard Bella's annoyed groan and I laughed.

"Wait, what are you two going to do in Port Angeles?" Jacob asked suspiciously from across the room. I'd forgotten that he didn't know.

"Kelly, Alice and I go to Port Angeles on a regular basis to get Kelly immune to the smell of human blood. It's working wonders so far." Edward said, getting up from the piano bench.

Jacob looked like he wanted to start a fight, but surprisingly, he let it go. Instead he said, "Take the other one with you too."

"Tristan?" Alice asked, "I don't think that's a good idea. Jasper will take him some other time. Separately."

"Why can't you guys go together?" Jacob wouldn't let up.

"Because," I cut in, "I don't like him."

I grabbed the keys to Edward's Volvo from a drawer and made my way to the garage, hoping he and Alice would follow me. They did. I tried handing the keys back to their owner, but Edward told me I could drive if I wanted to. I pushed the keys into his hand. It wasn't so much that I didn't want to drive, I just…couldn't.

"You can't drive? But…aren't you eighteen?" Edward asked.

"Edward," I stared at him. "I'm from New York. We walk _everywhere_. And if we aren't walking, then we're either taking the bus or the subway or the occasional taxi. Seriously, no one even uses their car unless it's to go out of town."

Alice gaped at me, wide-eyed. "Wow. Okay, we need to teach you someday. Forks is all driving. But not today. Today we work on your human immunity."

It was a very short drive to Port Angeles. When we got to the familiar parking spot where I always 'practiced', Edward rolled down the car windows. All the way.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, slightly panicked. "Get those back up. I'm not ready to just jump back in!"

Edward paused a moment, tilting his head a little to the side. "I think you are. Just buckle up your seat belt. That should hold you back a bit if you find that your control is uh, out of your control."

I gulped but did as he said. The seat belt felt restraining across my chest, and I wanted to get out of it, but it was for the safety of the fragile humans around me. A few peered discreetly into the car, curious as to why there were three unnaturally beautiful people in there. A honk from the Volvo's horn made the humans keep on walking. About an hour went by with the three of us talking about things from the daily life of the Cullens, to the most amusing and far-fetched vampire movies, to where we saw ourselves in a hundred years. We were talking so much that I barely noticed that my nose and throat were burning with the scent of human blood. At one point the conversation ceased and Alice hesitantly asked me if I was up to some memory-searching. I really, really didn't want to for fear of what I might see, but I couldn't say no to the look that was on Alice's face. It was a cross between a puppy hoping to follow someone home and a little girl who'd just made a new friend. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. There it was. Alice's beautiful pinkish colour, and next to hers was Edward's. His was a breath-taking shade of shimmering green. As smooth and vast and inviting as the grass on a golf course. I focused back on Alice because I was starting to get images of Edward cleaning his car about two weeks ago, and who needs to see that?

I was having difficulty getting to Alice's human memories. They were so deeply buried that it was like trying to dig a hole in cement, not impossible but very time and energy-consuming. Then suddenly, like an elastic band that's finally reached the end of its life cycle, a memory flung itself into my mind.

_There was a man in a white lab coat. His hair was shockingly red. It was like a flame, and it made his head look bigger than it actually was. The volume of his hair was especially weird when compared to his painfully skinny body. A name tag on his coat pocket identified him as Dr. Procter. _

There was a brief lapse in my concentration while I laughed at that ridiculous name. Doctor Procter? Seriously? Edward chuckled along with me, causing Alice to bounce in her seat asking us what happened. When I explained she cracked a smile as well, but frowned, trying unsuccessfully to place a face with the name. I closed my eyes again.

_Dr. Procter—_giggle—_was sitting behind a huge wooden desk. That was the only object of colour in the room. The rest of the space was a throbbing shade of white. There was one white chair in the middle of the room, facing the desk, and in that chair was Alice. She looked the same age as when I saw her in the other vision. The one of her mother bringing her to this place. A small blue-eyed girl with slight shoulders and shiny black hair that fell to just under her collarbone. She was dressed in the same clothes that I saw in the other vision too. A blue floral dress that reached her ankles. There was a really big muscular guy standing to her left. He stared dead ahead, totally emotionless. Alice, on the other hand, was all emotions. Silent tears were streaming relentlessly down her cheeks, her eyes and nose were red, she was shaking, and though her eyes were pointed downward, I could see the absolute terror in them. Plus, I could feel the fear and misery accompanying the memory. _

_Dr. Procter slowly got up from his desk. He picked up the chair he was sitting on and set it down a few feet away from Alice. _

"_Mary Alice," he said, taking a seat, "how do you feel?"_

_Alice didn't answer his question. Instead, she asked a couple of her own. "What is this place? Why did my mother leave me here?"_

"_Well, it's very complicated…Think of this place as…a haven. A safe place to get better, where no one will judge you." _

"_To get better? But I'm not sick," Alice protested. Her wide eyes were so innocent._

_Dr. Procter looked very pained. "No, no, you're not sick in the _physical_ way, but it's a different matter entirely when it comes to your mind. Your mother tells me you see…the future? How long has this been going on?"_

_Alice completely ignored his question. "When can I go back home?"_

"_Soon," Dr. Procter said with a tight smile. "If you're good."_

"_I'll be good." Alice said, with grim determination._

And the vision ended at that. I opened my mouth to tell Alice about it, but before I got any words out, another memory crawled out of Alice's subconscious.

_It was the white room again. Alice, a few years older than in the last memory, was sitting in the very same chair in the very same spot. The only difference was that now there were two muscular guys beside Alice instead of one. Dr. Procter was at his desk, writing something down furiously. His hair was still red, but it was thinning. Now he didn't look so Albert Einstein-ish. After a while he finally looked up and stared at Alice. She had her head tilted back so that she was looking up at the ceiling. A vague part of me noticed how this was different than the last time she was in this chair. Or at least, the last time that I saw her in the chair. _

"_Mary Alice," Dr. Procter said, clearing his throat._

"_Mary Alice," he repeated when she didn't immediately turn her attention to him. After a third time calling her name, Alice finally rolled her head to look Dr. Procter in the eye. Her hair was much longer now, almost reaching her waist. It wasn't as shiny as when she first entered the asylum._

"_How do you feel today, Mary Alice?"_

"_The same way I felt last week." Alice said. Her face was blank and her eyes were no longer innocent. No, there were more like…resentful. _

"_That's what you say every week," Dr. Procter muttered, scribbling something down again. "Has anything strange happened lately?" He asked in a louder voice. Alice shook her head._

"_Do you still have your 'visions'?" He asked, eyeing Alice skeptically. _

"_Yes I do, actually. Like I keep telling you, like I keep telling everyone: my visions are real! And they come true!"_

_Dr. Procter sighed. "Really? Haven't you been asking if you'd gotten a letter for a year now? You saw that in a vision didn't you? Where is that letter, Mary Alice? I don't see a letter."_

_Alice clenched her teeth but didn't answer._

"_You know, it's disappointing, Mary Alice. You've been here, how long? Three years? It's a shame that you haven't made any progress at all. If anything, you've gotten worse. Take her to her room." Dr. Procter directed the last bit to the two men. They each helped Alice up and led her to the door. At the last minute, Alice broke away from the men and turned back to face the doctor. _

"_I've been keeping track, and I know for a fact that I've been here for exactly three years and five days now. When I first got here, you said I'd be out soon. You lied. You lied! So now tell me the truth. When will I get out?" Alice was shaking, and sweat plastered her hair onto her forehead. _

"_Mary Alice, as long as you keep having these delusions that you call visions, I'm afraid we can't let you go anywhere."_

_Realization dawned on Alice and her shoulders went rigid. "I'm never going to leave, am I? I'm going to rot in this damn place and die here, aren't I? Aren't I!" _

_The two big men grabbed at her arms, but Alice was kicking too wildly, screaming too loudly. Dr. Procter shook his head sadly and massaged his temple. "Mary Alice, this isn't helping anybody. Calm down."_

_This had the opposite effect on Alice, since she tried to turn around and punch one of the men. She kept yelling for them to let her go, let her go, let her go. Finally, the men were forced to just pick Alice up. One guy held her under the armpits, and the other was desperately holding on to her flailing legs. Alice was not making it easy for them. By the time they reached her room, both men looked battered and bruised, and they were panting. They slammed the heavy metal door shut and left Alice to cry herself to sleep. _

"So?" Alice gazed at me expectantly, waiting to hear about what I saw. For a few seconds all I could do was stare at her. How different she looked from the visions of her past-self. This Alice was healthy. This Alice had a family that cared about her and loved her. This Alice was happy. I hugged her.

"Why do you want to dig up your past, Alice?" I asked, holding her tight. "You have a perfectly good present, you know."

"Of course I know, I just…now that I know it's possible to know, it's hard to leave it alone," Alice seemed to be confused at my behavior, but she didn't let go. I did.

"Well, you should know your past isn't very pretty," I laughed weakly, half joking.

"I know," she said in a grave voice that scared me. That was so unlike her. I shut my eyes and leaned back against the headrest, feeling exhausted. Searching through memories was hard, but now it was doubly so, since I was out of practice. Edward let me rest, and filled Alice in on what I saw.

My eyes snapped open when there was a long pause. Alice was frowning and staring hard into space.

"Alice, what is it?" I asked. She made a "shh" noise to tell me to stay quiet.

"I think some things are coming back to me. Did this Dr. Procter have…red hair? And was he really, really skinny?"

Both mine and Edward's eyes bulged and we glanced at each other.

"Yes, that's exactly right!" Edward was talking very fast. "Is there anything else you remember?"

Alice bit her lip and squinted her eyes. Those eyes widened. "Was the room white? Was there always at least one bodyguard-type guy hanging around me?"

Edward was nodding ecstatically and I let out a shout of excitement. Alice's face lit up like a supernova and she squeezed my hand hard. The three of us were on a high, trying to coax Alice into remembering more things. Before she tried to do so, she called Jasper and asked—well, _ordered_ him to come here and share this momentous occasion with her. I was so happy for Alice that I completely forgot that Jasper would probably bring some unwanted company. Everyone was happy, so deliriously happy. Which is why it sucked so much when someone suddenly yelled very loudly into my ear.

"Kelly? KELLY? Is that you?"

I turned toward the voice and my heart just about jumped out of my throat.

* * *

**Wow, can I just say THANK YOU to everyone who reads and reviews this? This story is just a few reviews shy of reaching 50. FIFTY! That's way more than I ever dared hope for when I first started writing this, so again: Thank you all so. Friggin. Much. Love you guys to pieces. :D**


	13. Help

**Ah, I'm so proud of myself. Another fairly quick update. :D This'll probably be the last update for a few weeks though. School is ending and I have a bunch of exams coming up. Blargh. But once things slow down...muahaha, expect a swell in updates because I declare this summer: THE SUMMER OF FANFICTION. xD**

**Thanks for the reviews, guys. In the words of a certain someone called Josh Groban, "You Raise Me Up." Teehee. **

**Chapter specially dedicated to my "editor" of a sister, who (whom?) I mostly based the character Natalie off of, I must admit. And who 'encouraged' me (cough) and let me use her laptop. :) **

**Disclaimer: Still writing FAN****fiction.**

* * *

**13. Help**

I stared up at the man standing in front of me in absolute horror. How could this be? He wasn't supposed to be here!

"Kelly…" He sounded like he was choking.

"Kelly, do you want me to drive out of here?" Edward asked under his breath, too low and too fast for human ears. Both of his hands were tight on the steering wheel, and he looked rigid. Alice was next to him, eyes wide. For once, it seemed like they both had no idea what to do. I shook my head in response to Edward's question. It was terrifying, and it could possibly put everyone I love in danger, but slowly, I unbuckled my seatbelt. A pale white arm reached out and gripped my hand.

"What are you doing?" Alice hissed, "It's not safe! You could _kill_ him."

"No, I…I just need to talk to him." My voice sounded desperate and dazed even to my own ears.

"How the hell is this possible? You're supposed to be d—...we thought you were—" The guy had been carrying two plastic bags, but now they were at his feet. I could smell that there were eggs in one of the bags. They were broken now.

"Adam," I began. Pain stabbed at my heart saying that name to a face I never thought I'd see again.

Tears welled up in Adam's eyes when he heard my voice. "So it's really you?"

I nodded, thankful for the second time that vampires couldn't cry. Adam was Natalie's boyfriend. He had been for five years since I was thirteen years old, and Nat and him were sixteen. He was practically part of the family. I stared at him, taking in his mouse brown hair and dark blue eyes. He was talking, with tears falling freely down his face. I heard the words and I knew what he was saying, but for some reason it wasn't registering. The only thing that I noticed was that he was getting louder. Hysterical. I looked back at Edward and Alice, panicking. Adam was starting to make a scene and people on the sidewalk were staring.

"Adam, Adam," I said, trying to calm him down, but his voice only got higher.

"No, Kelly. Just tell me why. Why did you leave? Do you know how heart-broken your family is? Your parents don't even leave the house anymore! Your dad goes to work and then comes home. Goes to work, comes home. Work, home, work, home. Your mom…" Adam let out a humourless laugh, "she's _so_ scared, Kelly. When Natalie went home to New York after you disappeared, your mom wouldn't even let her come back to school for weeks."

I wished he would stop. All this time I'd been trying to convince myself that my family was fine without me, that they had each other, but Adam was ripping a hole through me, and not only that; he was filling that hole with his sharp, stinging words.

"You need to come back, Kelly. _Now_. You need to come back and tell your parents that you're fine. You need to tell Natalie you're fine. You know she's planning on dropping out of law school to stay with your mom and dad?"

"She's still in New York?" I managed to choke out.

Adam shook his head, "No, she's in Seattle. She went back to school a couple months ago, but her heart's just not in it like it used to be."

"Adam, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." It sounded like I was apologizing to Adam, but really it was an apology to Nat, to my parents. To everyone who was hurting because of me. I had so many questions. How were Lex, Kevin, and Cammie? How were my other friends at school? But I didn't really want to know the answer. I couldn't bear it. One question that seemed innocent enough was, "Why are you in Port Angeles?"

"I'm getting take-out from that restaurant your sister likes. The one that's only available here. The question is what are _you_ doing here? And who are those people in the car? Kelly, are you in trouble? Are you—?"

His voice was cut off with a gasp. He was staring at my eyes with something like disbelief and horror. I realized with a gut-wrenching clarity that my contacts must have dissolved, showing the blood red irises underneath. Adam started trembling and backing away. This broke my heart most of all. The guy who I'd thought of as part of the family for so long was looking at me like the monster that I knew I was. "What—what the hell?"

I did something totally stupid just then. I took a step closer. I wanted desperately to assure Adam that I wasn't going to hurt him. That I _couldn't _hurt him, but he only took another clumsy step backward. A high-pitched wail was starting to come out of his throat.

_I can't…I can't…Edward, help! I don't know what to do!_

Some passersby had actually stopped to witness this spectacle. People would start noticing my eyes. They would start to recognize me as the girl from the news! We couldn't have that. We couldn't…

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a red Ferrari screech to a halt and two blond heads popped out. My head turned automatically. There was Jasper and Tristan, faces filled with confusion and concern. Jasper immediately caught on to what was happening by everyone's mood and Tristan seemed to get it too. Suddenly an idea struck me. What if Tristan could convince Adam to forget what he just saw? What if he could just tell Adam that he didn't see me altogether? Was his power strong enough to do that? At the moment, I was willing to try anything. Adam had just tripped over his plastic bags and was staring frantically at all the pale people around him. Edward and Alice had gotten out of their car too.

I turned to Tristan. The words tasted awful coming out but I had to get it over with.

"I need your help."

* * *

"Adam," Tristan was kneeling in front of Adam, one hand gently on his shoulder, "calm down. Breathe in…breathe out. Please stand up, Adam."

Adam slowly made his way to his feet, with some help from Tristan. He was inhaling and exhaling as instructed, with unfocused eyes. Occasionally he still made little wailing sounds, but Jasper released a wave of calm, silencing him. I watched from afar as Tristan talked to Adam in a quiet, soothing voice, trying to make him believe that all he saw was just someone who looked like me. It looked like it was working when suddenly Adam's eyes came back into focus and he cringed away from Tristan.

"No, you're lying. I did see her! Look, there she is! Kelly!" Adam side-stepped Tristan and came up to me. "What happened to you, Kelly? Why are your eyes like that? You have to come back with me. We have to tell Natalie—" Adam's voice was cut off again, but this time it was because I placed both my hands on either side of his head. I was careful not to squeeze too hard.

_Shut up, _I said in my head, gazing deep into Adam's eyes. They were wide and scared, but unable to look away. _You did not see me today. Understand? I don't exist anymore. You went out to buy Natalie some food, but the restaurant was closed. The restaurant was closed, so now you're going to go to another restaurant and buy her food there. You did not see me. The restaurant is closed. I'm dead. It would be impossible for you to have seen me, because I'm dead. Natalie doesn't have a sister anymore. You did not see any red eyes. You have never seen red eyes. Kelly Walker is gone. _

Then, something weird happened. I saw all of Adam's memories. All of them. All at once. Everything from his first day of college to the time he learned to tie his shoe laces. Everything. And…God, I don't know how to explain it. I picked out his recent memory of seeing me and the Cullens and Tristan, and…I erased it. I don't know how. It just disappeared. Adam's face went blank, and his shoulders sagged a little. I was afraid to let him go in case he fell, but something in my head told me it was okay. So I let my hands slip back to my sides, and surprisingly, Adam didn't collapse. He straightened up, turned around, and walked into a nearby restaurant—all the while with the same blank expression. I felt like I had a watermelon in my throat, I had that much trouble swallowing. Vaguely, I registered that people were asking me what just happened, but erasing Adam's memory had drained me. All of me. I didn't even have the energy to be surprised when Edward pulled me in his arms and hugged me. It was nothing romantic; he was just trying to comfort me because only he knew what I'd done. What I was forced to do. I leaned into his shoulder, not realizing how much I craved affection like this. It reminded me of the time when I was nine and I'd come home from school crying because some boys were teasing me. My mom was taking Natalie to the dentist, so only my dad was home. He saw me crying and he hugged me tight, even though he's not usually one to show affection. Of course, I knew it was ridiculous to compare Edward to my dad since Edward was actually younger than me. Physically at least.

"Home," I mumbled, too tired to even utter a complete sentence.

"Of course. Let's go," Edward agreed. I pulled away and got in the Volvo. Just in time, too. Not even a second after Edward closed the door after me, Adam walked out of the restaurant with a white take-out bag. The blank look was gone, replaced by the normal expression a person wears while they're minding their own business. He'd completely forgotten about our encounter.

Good.

* * *

When Edward pulled up to the driveway, everything seemed unreal. After months of being kept in this protective bubble with the Cullens, a little glimpse of someone from my human life had left me completely disoriented. Things didn't seem right, somehow, now that I knew my family—my real family—was suffering so much. Obviously I couldn't go back to New York to comfort my parents, no matter how much I wanted to, but I felt out of place here now.

"What are you saying, Kelly?" Edward asked, eyebrows furrowed.

I don't know.

Alice gracefully maneuvered herself so that she was now in the backseat with me. "Your future's kinda blurry. You're not planning on leaving us, are you?" Her eyes were worried. All at once, things went back into perspective. I couldn't leave the Cullens. Not after all they'd done for me. And I definitely couldn't leave Alice. Not now when she was finally starting to remember her past again.

"No," I said with resolve, "I'm not leaving. I'll stay here as long as you guys want me."

Alice let out a relieved sigh and hugged me. I hugged back, the life slowly and quietly returning to me.

"I'm sorry I almost got you guys discovered today." I said sheepishly. Edward and Alice just waved their hands dismissively and smiled. Someone knocked on the window and I jumped, irrationally worrying that it was Adam again. It wasn't. It was Jasper. We all got out of the car and made our way to the main house. I couldn't smell Jacob, meaning he was gone, so there was no need to put in new contacts.

"By the way, Kelly," Edward said, as if we'd been talking all along, "we still need to tell the others about what you did to Adam."

As soon as the words left his mouth, the whole house—minus Emmett and Rose, they were still on their vacation—appeared in front of us. Who's Adam? What did I do? Those were their questions. So I took a deep breath and explained.

"Well it shouldn't really be that surprising," Carlisle mused, after I was done, "after all, if you can retrieve memories, what would stop you from erasing them?"

Nessie looked worried. "Kelly? Can you promise me that you'll never erase any of my memories? I want to remember _everything_ about my life."

I smiled. Wait no, my face made my mouth smile, but there was no happiness behind it. "You don't have to worry about that, Ness. Erasing peoples' memories is exhausting work. I'm not likely to do it again."

After a few more questions around the room, it was time for Nessie to go to bed, and that was usually the signal for everyone to go to "vampire sleep" which is basically what we called it when everyone was left to their own devices during the night. I bid Nessie goodnight, and told everyone I was going out to hunt. I wasn't that thirsty, but I needed time to be completely alone. I spent three solid hours in the woods. The first two were spent actually feeding myself, but the third was just me running and jumping around the trees, trying to get Adam and Natalie and my parents off my mind. When that didn't work, I just lay down on the forest floor and looked up at the glowing moon filtering through the treetops. I suddenly noticed how many stars there were here in Forks. It was breathtakingly beautiful. In Manhattan, there were no stars. Maybe if you were lucky, you'd see maybe one or two, but usually only the moon was visible in the night sky. I loved New York, but the light pollution—and all the pollution in general—sucked. I probably spent another few hours just staring at the sparkling balls of gas, mesmerized, when I heard something behind me. I immediately sprang to my feet, fully alert.

Tristan raised his hands. As a sign of peace, I guessed. I sighed. Why won't he just leave me alone? Glaring doesn't keep him away and threats don't do any good. What is _up_ with this guy?

It was like the energy left me again. I didn't say anything. I just turned my back on him, sat back down on the ground and stared dead ahead. He was taking slow, careful steps toward me. A few feet away, I heard the soft sound of him sitting down as well.

"Edward's getting kind of worried that you've been gone so long. How're you holding up?" He asked gently.

I considered replying with some sort of sarcastic remark, but there was no meanness left inside of me. "Fine." I said instead. A few minutes went by with neither of us saying anything.

_Thank him, _a stupid voice in my head was saying. _He helped you._

Inwardly, I groaned. I was never any good at asking people I disliked for help, and even worse at thanking or apologizing to them. But I knew I had to thank him. It's how I was raised.

"Thanks."

"For what?" Tristan sounded perplexed.

"For helping me…with Adam." I squeezed my eyes shut and took a shaky breath. It felt weird to just…talk to him. No shouting, no threats. It was also strangely exciting.

Behind me, I thought I heard him take a shaky breath too. "Oh, that. Don't mention it, really. You asked for help, so I helped you."

For some unknown reason this made me turn around to face him. Against my better judgment, I heard myself gasp and felt my eyes widen. This was the first time since he bit me that I was looking at him without anger. Tristan looked absolutely amazing sitting there, bathed in moonlight. Chill out, Kelly. He's just a guy. A guy that you…hate. Out loud I said, "That's just it, though. I've been so awful to you. You didn't have to help me."

"Yes I did. If the roles were reversed, I know you'd do the same thing."

I don't know why, but this made me slightly defensive. "Oh yeah? And how do you know that?"

Tristan seemed unfazed by my tone. "Because you're a good person," he said simply.

Oh great, now he was making me feel like a total b-word. Here he was, being all nice and gentlemanly to me after I've done nothing but threaten to kill him. Were all English people like this? Suddenly I felt like I had to get away from him. Something dangerous was happening. Something that was starting to make me not hate him anymore.

"Okay, well, thanks for the chat," I said, standing up.

"Wait, wait. Kelly," Tristan got to his feet too. He reached out as if to touch my arm, but decided against it. "You really aren't a bad person. Everyone knows that. The only reason you act the way you do around me is because what _I _did was unacceptable. I should have had more control. I saw that you were surrounded by people who love and care about you, but I still bit you. I still turned you into…this—" he moved his hands to indicate what we both were. "You will never, ever know how sorry I am, Kelly, but I'll try every day to make it up to you. I promise. Just…can we at least _try_ to be friends?"

He looked so hopeful, so sad and so beautifully innocent that I got that feeling in my chest again. Warm and tingly. I was tempted, _so_ tempted to say yes. I mean, he was a nice guy, I could see that now. But I wasn't ready to forgive him. Doing so would feel wrong. It would be like saying that it was okay for him to change me. That I was fine with this life, fine with having my family be in pain.

"No," I whispered, and when I looked up, I saw that his shoulders were slumped and the flaming colour in his eyes that had made me nickname him Fire Eyes had become dull. "I'm sorry, Tristan. I wish I could say yes, but…it's not that easy."

Tristan let out a puff of air through his nose, as if he'd been holding his breath. He nodded, more as a polite gesture rather than an agreement.

"All right, then," he said, and walked back toward the house looking defeated.

**

* * *

****Reviews make me deliriously happy. Just FYI. ;)**


	14. Untitled

**Hallo! Just wanted to clear something up: Adam is not a wimp. Some of you (you know who you are) think that he is because he cried when he saw Kelly, but just try and see things from his point of view. He's known Kelly since she was thirteen ― that's **_**five**_** years. He loves Kelly like a sister and he's been with her through all the awkward stages of her growing up. Plus, he absolutely adores Kelly's sister, who's been hurting and depressed ever since Kelly disappeared, so some of that hurt/depression has rubbed off on him. That's all I'll say on this matter. Other things need to be covered in this A/N and I don't want it to be too long. Further questions and/or arguments can be left in a review or PM. Okay? Okay.**

**I've just realized that I got some info on Alice's past wrong. Her death date was supposed to be the same as the date of admission to the asylum and I read that her birth year was supposed to be 1901 (but Wikipedia usually can't be trusted right?) so if that's true, I apologize. Should've done more research before spurting out incorrect facts, but it'd be too troublesome to change things now, so let's all just ignore my mediocrity shall we? Hehe, thanks…**

**Special thanks to the glitter monster (JCullen The Cat) for her super long, super awesome review last chapter. Even though most of it was about stars…I appreciate it nonetheless. ;D **

**Special dedication to Doris (XxSugarMinuetxX) who's leaving Beijing. I'll miss youuu. :( I left you a tiny present in this chapter. 8D**

**Yeesh, sorry for the long A/N. I totally don't blame you if you just skipped the whole thing. **

**PS. This chapter is untitled because I just couldn't find one that didn't sound downright STUPID. If you have any suggestions, I'd welcome them with open arms. Seriously. I need help.**

* * *

**14. Untitled**

"What do lawyers mean when they say 'objection'?"

Tristan and Renesmee were sitting on the floor facing each other. They'd been doing this for over two hours now. Nessie had insisted that he teach her all of the law terms that he knew… and he knew a lot.

Nessie's eyebrows pulled together delicately before she remembered the answer. "Lawyers say 'objection' when they're protesting against the suitability of a question asked to a witness by another lawyer, with the purpose of making the judge decide if the question can be asked. Right?"

"Good!" Tristan laughed, and maybe it was just me, but it seemed like the fire in his eyes burned brighter while he was talking about something he cared about. "What are the different reasons for objection?"

"Oh, that's too easy! Irrelevant, immaterial, hearsay, leading, compound question, argumentative," Nessie recited, looking smug. I felt the corner of my mouth quirk up just at her cuteness.

"So if I asked a witness what their favourite colour is, when they're on trial for murder, you would say…?"

"Objection: irrelevant!"

"That's exactly right," Tristan smiled. "Hey, what do you say to a break?"

"Objection?" Nessie blurted out, causing both of them to laugh, but she stood up and stretched. She caught my eye and winked ― actually _winked _at me before going off to find her mother. Now what did that mean? I shook my head and went back to doodling on my notebook. I'd been drawing eyes. Big eyes, small eyes, fire eyes…

I tore out the page and crumpled it in disgust earning me an inquisitive look from Jasper, who was sitting across the living room. What was wrong with me? Ever since that night under the stars, when Tristan and I had talked for the first time_ without_ yelling, I couldn't stop thinking about him. There was no use in denying it, especially not since Edward could read minds and all. I mostly just ran over the things he'd said.

_Can we at least __try__ to be friends?_

I'd told him no, and I had my reasons, but I couldn't help but wonder: what if we had met under different circumstances? What if he was just human and we'd just seen each other at the ice-skating rink and started talking? We _could_ have been friends. Maybe even something…more?

Just my luck, Edward walked in the front door just as I was thinking that and looked at me in surprise. It felt wrong that my temperature stayed cool, since I felt like I should be burning with embarrassment. I got up and made my way out before he could talk to me. I made sure to bring the notebook and crumpled piece of paper with me.

"Don't say a word," I hissed as I passed him.

Before I could escape, Alice jumped up from her seat next to Jasper, "Em and Rose are on their way home!" She said happily.

"Too bad," Jasper murmured, "it was so peaceful here without Emmett."

A few seconds later, the sound of tires squealing announced the arrival of Emmett and Rosalie. Everyone aside from Carlisle, who was at the hospital, was waiting eagerly outside. The first door opened and Emmett hopped out with a grin on his face.

"Ya'll miss us?" he roared in his typical way. Before we could answer, a loud and long honk sounded from the car. Emmett quickly made his way to the passenger side and opened the door sheepishly. Rosalie stepped out in all her elegant glory. What little sun there was reflected off of her golden waves and made her face sparkle faintly as if someone had thrown silver glitter on it. But I knew that if someone had tried throwing anything in Rosalie's face, she wouldn't hesitate to cut their arm off. Her face broke into a radiant smile when she saw Nessie run up to her.

"Darlings, how was your trip?" Esme asked, pulling Emmett and Rosalie in for a group hug.

"It was great." Rosalie answered. "The island was beautiful and we could enjoy the sun without having to worry about any pesky humans. Good wildlife too."

I cringed as glimpses of her memories showed me that wildlife wasn't the only thing she'd enjoyed.

"Oh, and before we came home, we visited Denali," Emmett chimed in, "Tanya wanted to know how everyone was doing. And she sends her love." He added that last part while glancing at Tristan, who cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"So did we miss much?" Rosalie asked, noticing how calm I seemed to be even though Tristan was only a few people away.

"Yeah, did Kelly take anger management classes or something?" Emmett joked. Oh, how funny. I smiled ironically at him.

Alice's eyes twinkled and she ignored Emmett altogether, instead answering Rosalie's question. "Oh, nothing major, Rose. I'm just slowly but surely starting to remember my past, and Kelly just discovered she can erase memories!"

I noticed something flicker in Rosalie's eyes when Alice told her about my newfound ability, but it disappeared quickly and was replaced by joy as she hugged Alice.

"I'm so happy for you! What kind of things are you remembering?" Rose and Alice walked into the house together, while Alice recapped what she knew. I was aware of Nessie in the background asking Emmett what kind of animals were at the island where they stayed.

"Oh, tons," he said. "I think you would've especially liked the dolphins. They let Aunt Rose and I pet them, and you know how animals usually stay away from us…" Emmett's voice faded as he and Ness went inside too. Eventually it was only Edward and me left outside.

"What's on the paper?" he asked, nodding to the piece of wrinkled paper clutched tightly in my hand.

I glared at him, "As if you don't know."

He dropped the innocent act and grinned. "You're right, I do know. So, what? You like―"

"Shut _up_!" I hissed, clamping my free hand over his mouth before he could finish his sentence. I let go immediately. "And no, I don't like…who you think I like. I was just thinking what things might, I repeat: _might _have happened if things were different. If life was as it should be. Don't take things out of context, and _don't _tell anyone."

"What's there to tell?" Edward asked, clearly amused.

"Exactly."

* * *

At ten o'clock that night, after Emmett and Rosalie were fully informed by Carlisle on what had happened since they left, it was time for my human immunity/memory-searching session. Carlisle and Edward had decided that it was better to go at night now to decrease any chance of me bumping into anyone else I knew.

The car was going to be absolutely full this time. Along with Jasper, Carlisle was joining us too. After hearing about my power secondhand all this time, he wanted to "see me in action."

"Will you be joining us, Tristan?" Carlisle asked. I had to work hard not to protest, but everyone's eyes still went to me. Including Tristan's burning gaze. He waited a few seconds before he answered.

"Thank you, Carlisle, but I was actually going to take Nessie star-gazing tonight."

Renesmee looked at him in mild confusion, but said nothing, smart as she was. He was obviously lying, trying to appease me and I was grateful for it. Sure, I could handle being in the same house now, but a cramped car? No thanks.

When we got to Port Angeles, Alice made me tuck my hair up into my blue beanie and put on the oversized sunglasses that I had stolen in New York as a disguise. I looked completely ridiculous but it was for the best.

I felt sort of self-conscious with a larger audience around me and that sort of delayed things. It took me longer to get past the darkness in Alice's mind, but I got there.

_Alice was in her room again and the broken light bulb had been replaced. Not that that made much of a difference. The room was still very dim. A limp figure was lying down on the hard bed, face buried in the thin pillow. Alice's face was covered by her long, stringy hair. The heavy, metal door opened and a tough-looking woman in a nurse's uniform came in._

_"Ms. Brandon, you may have thirty minutes of recreation time today," she said in a monotone voice. _

_Alice lifted her head slightly and blinked at the artificial brightness that spilled into her room. Although the rest of her seemed tired and dirty, her blue eyes were surprisingly clear and alert. It made her beautiful. She got out of the bed and walked steadily past the woman, who kept a couple paces behind. _

_The corridor that Alice was walking through was filled with people. Some in uniform, some in the patients' gowns. A skinny old woman with red-rimmed eyes was staring at Alice and muttering. She made as if to grab Alice, but the nurse gripped the woman's wrist and told her to settle down or else "recreation time" would be over. The woman licked her lips started rubbing her bare foot on the wall._

I had to stop for a while. The images sent unpleasant shivers through my body and almost made me sick. Smell was also part of the memory, and let's just say that I'd rather sit downwind from Jacob than live in that place. I looked over at Edward who had on a horrified expression as well. He was narrating what I saw to the others, so all of our expressions were pretty much the same. Except Alice. She just looked sad. I took a breath and dived back in. Metaphorically.

_The younger Alice walked on, but everywhere she went, crazy patients kept trying to get closer to her. All of them. No matter what their age or gender. Alice didn't seem scared though, she just gazed at them like she understood. Understood what, I had no idea. _

_At one point, the nurse got sidetracked by a patient who was having a tantrum. She told Alice to wait, but after a few seconds, Alice walked away. She kept looking around the wall as if she was searching for something. She found it. A calendar on the wall. The year was 1930. The fifteen-year-old's shoulders visibly sagged. She was about to turn back and return to the nurse when a figure blocked her path. The figure was that of an old man. He looked like he was in his early to mid eighties. He was mostly bald, except for a ring of wispy, orange hair on the sides and back of his head. His back was hunched, and his thick glasses hung heavy on his big, beak-like nose. The man's blue-green eyes were piercing and looked like they'd seen a lifetime's worth of horrible things. He was also jumpy._

_Any normal person would've been troubled by this strange little man, but not Alice. Alice looked like she'd been expecting him to be there. "Hi," she said, her voice sounding calm and kind. It seemed to soothe the man's nerves for a moment. Only for a moment._

_"You!" The man rasped, back to his anxious self. "You need to get out of here! You're in danger. Oh, such terrible, terrible danger…leave while you have the chance."_

_A line appeared in between Alice's eyebrows, but she didn't reply. She didn't have a chance. A younger man in uniform had swooped in and clamped a hand on the older man, making him yelp. Alice looked up at the newcomer, and this time she was startled. Her ice blue eyes widened as she took in the tall man with pale skin and crimson eyes. _

I gasped. Everybody in the car was silent. This was him. The vampire that was to save Alice's life.

_The man seemed to be in his forties, but he was mesmerizing, with those eyes and clear skin and his hair that looked like some kind of expensive, dark wood. He smiled. A smile that wasn't meant to be threatening, but both Alice and the old man took a step back. _

_"Well," said the vampire, "our two fortune tellers meet at last. Phillip?" He directed at the trembling old man. "What have I told you about talking to people who aren't me?" _

_Phillip swallowed. With some difficulty. "I just needed to tell her about―"_

_"Shh, quiet down," the vampire said, steering Phillip away from Alice. She stayed put for a moment, before quietly padding after the two of them. She had to strain to hear what the vampire was saying, but fortunately he had to talk louder than normal because Phillip had trouble hearing. _

_"You have to stop doing this, Phillip. You're going to get in trouble one day, and I won't be there to save you. I'm the only nice one of my kind, all right? All the others would kill you without a second thought."_

_"I know, but she's just so young. And she's going to die! I had to warn her…" Phillip made a frightening sound in his throat that made me imagine he was throwing up his lungs. Then I realized he was coughing._

_The vampire gently patted the old man's back. "Don't you worry, I'll warn her for you. Your job is just to rest and tell no one of your visions. All right?" _

_Phillip nodded. They had reached a room, and he sat down wearily on a bed. The vampire injected something into Phillip's frail, liver-spotted arm and he soon dozed off. The vampire turned before Alice could hide, but that wasn't necessary. He knew the whole time that she was listening, of course. He smiled at her, and this time Alice didn't so much as flinch. _

_"Who are you?" she asked then shook her head, instead asking, "_What_ are you?"_

_The vampire chuckled, not unkindly. "You _are_ smart, aren't you? Well, unfortunately I can only answer one of those questions. My name is Dr. Logan and I'll be replacing Dr. Procter." _

Everyone was so quiet that the silence rang in my ears.

"Dr. Logan?" Alice murmured. "Why did you stop? We were just getting somewhere!"

"I'm sorry, Alice. I'm just too tired. My brain feels like it's getting fried." I rubbed my temples, as if to prove the point.

Alice's eyes immediately looked guilty. "No, I should be apologizing, Kelly. I was selfish, I didn't even think how much of a toll this would take on you."

"Don't be silly," I said dismissively, "I just need a short break, that's all."

But Alice insisted that we stop now and continue tomorrow. I was grateful for this because I really needed more than just a short break, but I could see the longing in Alice's face to know more about the vampire who changed her.

Carlisle let out a long whistle. "That sure was something, Kelly. Be careful not to push it, though. That took about―" he glanced at his watch, "―fifteen minutes, but I don't think you should be doing more than five minutes at a time. Especially not while you're this new to your power."

"I'm fine, Carlisle, really." I assured him but a voice in the back of my head was telling me to listen to him.

I decided to change the subject. "Edward, did you see earlier today, when there was the slightest change of expression on Rosalie's face when Alice told her I could erase memories? What was she thinking?"

Edward exchanged a glance with every one else in the car. Rosalie's past was the only one that I didn't know about because no one talked about it, and she never thought about it when I was around, but I suddenly had the urge to know.

"I think Rose should tell you herself about what happened to her, but earlier today she was just debating with herself whether she wanted one of her memories removed or not. That's all." Edward explained.

That's all? That's _all_? He said that as if wiping out memories was no big deal, but it was. It was tiring and draining. And the only experience I could draw from was erasing two minutes of Adam's mind. Just two minutes, but it made me tired as hell.

Edward looked at me sheepishly and apologized. I was just opening my mouth to forgive him when Carlisle's cell phone rang, causing a chain reaction. Alice stiffened as her eyes went unfocused which made Edward go rigid, making Jasper tense up which immediately made me feel uneasy.

"That was Esme," Carlisle said after he hung up. His voice was grave. "She says we just got a letter from the Volturi."

* * *

**The Volturi still use snail mail because they're completely oblivious to text messaging. Psht, how lame. :P **

**Anyway, I have news! A while ago, I found out that my story was added to a community called "The Best Twilight OCs." I was jumping off the walls with happiness! And, the creator of that community (Luckyiris) has this FREAKING INCREDIBLE Twilight story called "Come What May" and I swear on my friend Film's life (hah) that I'm not just saying that because she added my story to the community. It is truly fantastic. Pretty graphic though, so watch out if you're squeamish. **

**Ah, so now I can start updating more frequently. Exams are over and school ends on July 2nd. The day before my birthday… :D (Hint hint? Review review?)**

**By the way, who's seen the trailer for Voyage of the Dawn Treader? Didn't William Moseley and Ben Barnes look FINE? xD Swoon much. **


	15. Pollution

**Boy, I'm in a good mood. This chapter was a little hard to write but I'm pretty happy with the end result, and it was damn fun writing it. xD **

**I want to thank everyone who made my birthday super special. Especially BeckyMusic (who freaking wrote a story for me!), JCullen The Cat (posted her new NightWorld story and made a mention of Josh Groban :P) and filmyfurry (posted a new chapter of her PJO story and dedicated it to me. :D) Thanks so much you guys!**

**Thanks for the suggestions on the last chap title, guys, but it actually kinda grew on me. :P So I'll probably keep it unless I find something that absolutely blows me away...**

**Disclaimer: Own Twilight, I do not.**

* * *

**15. Pollution**

On our way home, it started raining. Hard. The raindrops sounded like bullets as they came into contact with the speeding car. Edward had the pedal pressed all the way down until it was parallel to the floor. None of the vampires in the car even flinched at the speed; everyone was way too tense to move. I shot a glance at Jasper and saw that he was pressing himself against the backseat, trying to get as much space between himself and everyone else as possible. Not that it helped. I could tell by the look of major discomfort on his face that the emotions were overwhelming him.

When we pulled up to the white mansion, he couldn't escape the car fast enough. Not that I blamed him. The tension in the air was so thick it was almost suffocating.

I dashed into the house so fast that I didn't even have time to get wet, even though it was absolutely _pouring_ outside. Carlisle immediately headed to the dining room and we all followed. There, I saw that Esme, Bella, Emmett and Rosalie were crowded around one side of the dining table. The absence of one person in particular seemed to stand out to me.

"Where's Tristan?" I couldn't help but ask.

Bella was wearing an anxious expression. "He's still out star-watching with Nessie. They should be back by now!"

Edward took Bella by the shoulders and hugged her. He whispered something in her ear, but I didn't care to listen. The back of my neck felt prickly and my muscles were wound so tightly that I was trembling slightly. Tristan and Renesmee were in the woods…just the two of them. What if the Volturi were here? What if they took them by surprise? There are a _lot _of members of the Volturi guard, no way Tristan could defend himself _and _Nessie!

Edward was looking at me sharply. "Alice," he snapped. "Are the Volturi here?"

Alice shook her head vehemently, "No. No they're not. Each and every member of the Volturi are still in Italy."

She looked so sure of herself that for a moment, I felt better. But the moment was short-lived. Carlisle took a white envelope out of Esme's hand.

"You haven't opened it yet?" he asked her. His voice was calm and gentle as always, but with an undertone of urgency.

"No, we wanted to wait until you got home," Esme replied, her voice sounding frail. Everything about her looked frail. Her caramel hair was pulled back in a pony tail, revealing her long, delicate neck which had a scar on it. The scar left by a vampire bite. Her hands shook as they pulled her blue sweater closer to herself. Esme looked positively terrified.

My eyes stung. This image of Esme right now, was how my own mother looked that time I saw her on the news. Although Esme and my mom looked nothing alike—my mom is tall, with jet black, shoulder-length hair and fierce green eyes, whereas Esme is petite, with long, caramel-coloured hair and warm butterscotch eyes—the one similarity that was evident in both of their faces was enough to make me want to break down and cry. The fear. It was the fear and concern that they had, not for themselves, but for their families.

I went up to Esme and held on tightly to her hand while Carlisle slowly tore the envelope open.

A postcard.

Carlisle was holding a postcard in his hands. He quickly scanned both sides and passed it around to everyone in the room. The looks on their faces went from reluctantly curious to a weird mix of relief and horror. When the postcard reached me, I could see why.

It was a picture. A beautiful picture of a wide blue sky and closely packed ancient-looking brick and stone buildings. Written on the cloudless sky were the words, "Greetings from Italy! Wish you were here." I turned the card over.

_To my dearest friends,_

_Volterra is very nice this time of year. Please do not hesitate to pay us a visit. But then again, Volterra might be too sunny for you. We hope to see all of you very soon. Don't let this slip your memory…_

_Yours truly,_

_Aro_

I handed the postcard back to Carlisle without looking at him. Without looking at anyone. I just stared at the plush, white carpet. So now I understood why everyone was looking a little relieved. I mean, if the Volturi was inviting us to visit _them_, then that doesn't mean that they'll come here…right? But I didn't fully understand why they looked so horrified. I had a sneaking suspicion, but I didn't dare say it out loud.

"So what does this mean?" I said instead.

Before anyone could answer me, Tristan and Nessie walked through the front door, hand in hand. An overwhelming sense of relief and happiness washed over me. _I'm just glad that Nessie's safe. That's why. _

Carlisle hid the postcard behind his back and Bella tried her best to plaster on a happy face. An understanding went through the room that we should not tell Ness about this.

"Time for bed, sweetie." Bella said, steering her daughter back out the door and toward their cottage home. Nessie turned around to wave everyone goodbye and thank Tristan before allowing herself to be pushed out by her mother.

Tristan frowned. "What's going on?"

"The Volturi sent this to us," said Carlisle, passing the postcard to Tristan. His bright campfire eyes darted over the words quickly and widened, before travelling up to meet mine. He stared at me long enough to make me feel self-conscious. My defense mechanism kicked in. That is to say, I got angry.

"What?" I snapped.

Tristan seemed unfazed by my hostility, as usual. He just kept on staring at me with something like worry in his eyes. "They know about you," he whispered.

A jolt went through me. It was exactly what I'd been thinking. "_Don't let this slip your memory…_" That's what Aro had written. But why would he write that? Of course we wouldn't forget. Vampires aren't supposed to forget anything. So the only reason he'd put that in there would be to—

"To hint that he knows about you. You _and_ your power," Edward finished my thought for me.

This caused a stir among the vampires in the room. They all started firing off questions and speculations.

"How did they find out, though?"

"Do they have spies?"

"Maybe Aro didn't mean anything by that!"

"Aro always means something…"

"Alice, can you see exactly how much they know?"

Suddenly a terrifying thought occurred to me. "If they know about me, who's to say they don't know about my family?"

Carlisle opened his mouth to say something, but a sound made him freeze. Made all of us freeze. The sound of tires crunching on gravel. Someone was driving up to the house in the middle of the night.

Edward was the first to relax. He let out a gush of air and smiled wearily.

"Don't worry," he sighed in relief, "it's just the Denali coven coming over for a visit."

This, for some reason, made Tristan even more tense. While everyone released the breath they'd been holding and let their shoulders go slack, he didn't change his body language at all. In my peripheral vision, I could see him glance at me. Not that I acknowledged him. I was too busy trying to stare out the window to see with my own eyes what the Denalis looked like. I'd only seen Eleazar before, when he'd told me what my special ability was.

Esme opened the front door and sure enough, it was him who walked in first, with a woman who I knew as Carmen at his side. They both greeted me warmly and Eleazar asked how I was doing. Then clapped Tristan's shoulder.

Oh right. I remembered that Tristan had stayed with the Denalis before he came intruding here.

After that came another couple, Kate and Garrett. Followed by Tanya. I felt my eyes widen. She was _beautiful_. I'd seen her before, of course—I'd seen everyone before in the Cullens' memories—but meeting someone in person was a different matter entirely. Tanya was tall and slender, with flowing, curly hair. I guess most people would describe it as 'strawberry-blonde' but honestly, I never had any idea what that meant. Strawberries are a violent shade of red, and there was nothing violent about Tanya's hair. I'd describe it as 'soft red'. She gave everyone a friendly hug, before turning to face me.

"You must be Kelly," she said, showing off her pearly whites and taking my hand, "Tristan's told me a lot about you."

"Has he?" I raised an eyebrow. I didn't see how that was possible. He didn't know the first thing about me. "How interesting."

Tanya didn't seem to hear me. She walked toward Tristan and smiled in what I thought was an overly flirtatious manner. She opened her arms and hugged Tristan. Despite his rigidity, she completely melted in his arms. I thought I even heard her say "I've missed you."

_Tristan and Tanya were together somewhere in a forest. Tristan was draining a small caribou while Tanya looked on. When he was done, he set it down gently and stroked the creature's neck, where it'd been bitten by him. When he straightened up, he noticed that Tanya was staring at him. There was something in her eyes that…irritated me. There was a sort of longing there. _

_"What are you looking at?" Tristan asked, looking slightly uncomfortable. _

_"You, of course," Tanya batted her eyelashes. She'd been lounging on a huge tree root, but now she stood up and sashayed toward Tristan, who took a step back every time she took a step forward. He had to stop when he'd finally been backed up against a tree. _

_"You have a smidgeon of blood on your lip," she said, raising a hand to wipe the non-existent blood off. Her hands slid from Tristan's lips to the back of his neck and she started to pull him closer._

I coughed loudly, trying to distract Tanya—because this memory belonged to her—from her reminiscing. For some reason, I was furious. It made no sense. Why did I care? Why should I give a damn that Tristan had stayed with Tanya for who knows how long and that there was something going on with them?

Edward cleared his throat and oh, so casually stepped in between me and Tanya.

"Let's all take a seat and fill the Denalis in on what's been happening, shall we?" he said, giving me a pointed look.

The recap took ages. I made it a point not to look at Tanya and Tristan, sitting next to each other so snugly. Mostly I just sat there, sandwiched between Edward and Jasper, who kept my emotions in check.

"So, let me get this straight," it was Eleazar speaking. His eyes were full of awe, "Kelly can…erase…memories… I've never even heard of such a powerful thing." He shook his head, mostly talking to himself now. "And Tristan can just…convince people to do things…"

I have to admit, it freaked me out a little to hear him talking like that. Like we were collectibles that he'd stumbled across. Like we were treasure to a pirate. Like we were weapons of some sort.

Finally, he came out of his trance and asked sharply, "And you say the Volturi sent a letter?"

"A postcard," Carlisle said, giving it to him. "Aro wants us to visit him."

The guests all examined the postcard over Eleazar's shoulder and frowned.

"This sounds like a very subtle threat," the one named Kate said. "What's that about not letting this slip your memory?"

"We think they somehow found out about Kelly and that they want to meet her," Edward sighed. He looked so tired.

Tanya's eyes flickered, "Do they know about Tristan?"

"Let's hope not," Eleazar cut in. "If they do… you can bet that Aro will stop at nothing to get his hands on this family."

I gulped, and acidic venom burned my throat. What Eleazar said… it brought back the thought I'd been having before the Denali coven had come.

"My parents, Natalie... I have to do something," I said silently to no one in particular.

When I was met with puzzled expressions, I explained that if the Volturi knew about me, they must know about my family.

"They all live in New York?" Eleazar asked.

I nodded, then shook my head. "My parents are there, but Nat goes to university in Seattle."

"_Seattle_? That is too close to us! Your sister is not safe there!" The dark-haired beauty at Eleazar's side, Carmen, exclaimed.

"Carmen's right," Kate said grimly, "you have to get her as far away as possible from you. If the Volturi decide you guys are taking too long to visit them, they might take matters into their own hands. Didn't they say as much in the card?" She pointed somewhere on the postcard.

"Oh God, no," I groaned into my hands. How was it possible that I'd put my family in such danger when I hadn't even seen them in almost half a year. "So, what? Can I move them to Australia or something?"

"I think it would be sufficient to get Natalie to go to New York. Then your whole family would be together and I can get Peter and Charlotte to watch over them," Jasper suggested. He supplied me with memories of his friends. I noted their eye colour.

"But they're not… I mean, they drink human blood," I said. No way in hell was I letting non-vegetarian vampires play bodyguard to my fragile human family.

"They won't feed on them, Kelly."

"It's not just that, Jasper," I insisted, "I have other loved ones in New York. Peter and Charlotte still have to feed, right? I don't want to take the chance that they could be sucking on my best friend."

Jasper sighed, but didn't push me. He could've used the fact that there are more than eight million people in Manhattan against me, but I'm grateful that he didn't.

"We'll watch them," Carmen piped up. She looked back at the rest of her clan for confirmation. "Yes? We've stayed in Alaska too long, anyway. We could move to one of the more rural parts of New York, and keep an eye on them."

It was a brilliant plan except for one little flaw. My family didn't live in the rural parts of New York. But an idea struck me. And it involved asking for Tristan's help. Again.

I tried to bring myself to look at him, I really did, but I just couldn't. All I saw were Tanya's curls and her long, perfect legs pressed up against his.

Edward, bless him, took it upon himself to voice my idea to the room. "You know, Kelly's parents live in the city, but maybe Tristan could convince them that they want to move to Upstate New York for a fresh start?"

After some discussion, we came to a conclusion and made up a plan.

Step One: I would somehow get Natalie to leave Seattle for good to stay with my parents—which shouldn't be too hard. After all, Adam had said that she wanted to drop out of college to go back to them anyway. Step Two: Me, Edward, Tristan and the Denali clan would go back to my hometown so that Tristan could brainwash my poor dad into moving to Westchester County, a quiet, cozy, sleepy little town in Upstate New York. Step Three: The Denalis would get a house somewhere close to my family and watch them around the clock from then on, while the rest of us go back to Forks and wing it from there.

As it turned out, we would never even complete Step One.

* * *

It was getting light outside and I was impatient to get started with the plan, but Carlisle said I should hunt first. My eyes were getting dark. I was about to leave when Edward stopped me.

"Kelly, I don't think you should go alone," he said. "In fact, from now on, no one go anywhere alone, okay? Aro wants us to visit him, but there's always the possibility that they'll come here first."

His words sent a wave of anxiety through me, making me quick to agree to his terms. Everyone in the room had dispersed throughout the house, so I went to find Alice to see if she wanted to come with me. I heard light footsteps behind me and turned to find Tristan catching up to me.

"Can I go hunting with you?" he asked. "I haven't had anything in a while."

I narrowed my eyes at him. Well that was just a blatant lie if I ever did hear one. His eyes weren't dark at all. Actually, they were just the opposite. His eyes were turning even more golden with each passing day, and starting to lose the reddish-orange tinge that I had sort of grown to…like. Just a little.

Tristan seemed to realize that I knew he was lying. "Okay, fine. I just went hunting yesterday, but I need to talk to you."

"What about Tanya?" I said, and was embarrassed to hear that my voice sounded bitter.

"Uh, she's talking to Alice about something."

I looked around, trying to find something or someone to help me, but I was met with an empty room. Inwardly, I sighed. "Whatever."

I took off running and could hear Tristan keeping pace right beside me. I ran faster so that he'd fall back, instead he just grinned at me and matched my speed. As much I hate to admit it, I had to suppress a smile. It felt good to run like this with somebody. Maybe Tristan wasn't so―

Blood.

The scent of it cut off my trail of thought and my mind was entirely consumed with the smell and the sound of thick, wet blood gushing underneath thin, penetrable skin. The venom in my mouth started flowing and I crouched down behind a fallen log. I was in full predator mode, running my tongue across my sharp teeth, muscles coiled.

A majestic-looking elk was drinking at a small stream. The shaggy fur at its throat was partly wet from the fine mist that sprayed off the rocks. I jumped.

Hunting elk was usually pretty easy, but this one seemed to really want to live. It put on a decent fight and I couldn't get a clear shot at its throat. But there was one difference between elk and vampires. Vampires don't get tired. Slowly, I could feel the elk's muscles weakening until it just lay there, staring up at me. For a moment, time froze. I couldn't stop staring at the elk's eyes. They were solemn and resentful. I leaned down to sink my teeth into its neck but it jerked away. I tried again, it bucked its shoulder. The elk seemed to understand that it was no match for a predator like me, but that didn't mean it wasn't going to give me a hard time ending its life.

So that's why I let it go.

I got off the elk. For a second it seemed confused, but then it got up and dashed away.

"Why did you do that?" Tristan's gentle voice came from behind me.

I shrugged, "I'm not that hungry."

"Yes you are," he argued, walking around so that he faced me, "You're eyes are almost black, and that elk was one of the best-smelling ones anyone's ever encountered. Why did you let it go?"

"I don't know," I lied, getting angry. "Can you just drop it?"

"Fine," Tristan said, though it didn't look like he wanted to.

"Good."

Neither of us spoke for a few minutes. I don't know what Tristan was doing, but I was looking up at the rising sun. It was magnificent. There were some gray clouds covering the yellow orb, but the tendrils of pink and purple that were reaching through the clouds were awe-inspiring.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Tristan said beside me. Involuntarily, my eyes flickered toward him and I took in the fact that he was standing close to me. Too close. I had to concentrate on keeping my breathing regular.

"Yes," I said softly, "but at the same time, no."

He stared down at me, confused. "Care to elaborate on that?"

"It's only beautiful because of the air pollution," I began, keeping my eyes on the horizon. "It causes an increase in the amount of particles in the air so that it makes a more brilliant high-wavelength light. As a result, the reds, oranges, yellows, pinks and purples are more intense. So really, the more beautiful a sunrise is, the more pollution there is."

I had just recited a chapter from my Physics textbook. Go me.

Finally, I looked over at Tristan to see that he was gaping. When he recovered, he asked, "What about sunsets?"

"Same thing."

Tristan let out a low whistle. "Well that takes the romance out of things."

I glared at him, "You have enough romance in your life."

"Oh, about Tanya…I can explain," Tristan rubbed the back of his neck. I'd come to realize that that's what he did when he was nervous or embarrassed.

"What are you talking about? There's nothing to explain," I said sweetly, but inside my stomach was churning. Sickeningly.

"I feel bad. I mean, it's not what you think―"

"You're kinda self-centered aren't you?" I snapped, inexplicably mad. "That you think I care about your love life with Tanya? Please." I scoffed.

"There's nothing going on between me and Tanya!" Tristan said, on the verge of yelling.

"Yeah, sure, tell _her_ that," I said, matching his tone.

"Don't you think I've tried? I didn't think you cared, anyway."

"I don't," I glowered, "You're the one who insisted on trying to explain something that didn't need explaining!"

Tristan let out a short growl. I was startled, it was the first time I'd seen him be anything but…well, nice.

"You know why I let that elk go?" I asked suddenly. When he remained silent, I went on. "Because it had the will to live. It fought me like no other animal has fought me since you turned me into a vampire." I was aware that my voice was cracking, but I didn't care. "And when it finally got tired, it didn't even give up. It was still, sure, but it just stared at me like it was telling me to take my best shot, and it made it damn hard to bite. I know that seems stupid, but that's why I let it go. Because it was willing to stare death in the eye."

I took a deep breath, letting the crisp scent of the forest flow through me.

"Oh," Tristan whispered. I knew he wanted to know why I just told him that, but he was too polite to ask.

"It was my turn to explain something that didn't need explaining," I shrugged.

After a brief pause he asked me, "Did the elk remind you of someone?" _Like yourself? _

He didn't say the last two words, but he might as well have. I looked him in the eye and I knew he saw the accusation in them.

"Sorry," he whispered.

"I wish you'd stop saying that! Apologies aren't going to do anything now, are they? They can't make me human again, they can't make my heart beat, they won't make my sister any happier, they won't comfort my mom…" I couldn't go on. My voice caught in my throat and embarrassingly enough, I started "crying" in front of the guy I hated. I pressed the base of my palms to my eyes to cover them. I hated showing this weakness. I hated that I even had this weakness in the first place.

A tentative hand placed itself softly on my shoulder. When I didn't flinch away, Tristan pulled me closer to him.

_He's hugging me, _I thought dizzily. _He's hugging me and I'm not biting his head off. What's wrong with this picture?_

What's wrong with this picture?

I pressed a hand against his chest–ignoring the pleasant feel of his body under his t-shirt–and pushed him away. It was a surprisingly hard thing to do.

"I think you should go," I murmured, keeping my eyes on my hand.

"But Edward said―"

"I need to hunt…alone."

I glanced up and met his concerned eyes once, before sprinting in the other direction.

* * *

**Reviews make the stars shine, the moon glow, the children smile and the world go round. ;D**


	16. Observations

**I know! I know. So much for the Summer of Fanfiction, right? Feel free to beat me up. **

**You know..._after_ you review. xD**

**By the way, Chapters 1-3 have been re-VAMPED. Just little tweaks here and there, but it would mean a lot to me if you read it and tell me what you think?**

* * *

**16. Observations**

I could only drain one rabbit before anxiety completely took over. I _had _to get back to the house and get started on the Plan. My sister's life depended on it.

A flash of blonde hair caught my eye, giving me serious déjà vu. I growled when I realized who it was. "Tristan."

Tristan sheepishly stepped away from the tree he was hiding behind, and the image was so painfully familiar that I had to look away. That was the last thing I'd seen as a human: Tristan coming out from behind the tree and attacking me.

"What are you_ doing _here?" I asked him now.

"Well, I—I can't leave you," he replied, then when I raised my eyebrows he added, "I mean, the Volturi know about you so—"

"Thanks, but I can take care of myself. And I was just leaving."

Tristan sighed, "Kelly, you can't leave. You barely drank anything."

I was already a few feet away from him. "I'll survive," I called over my shoulder.

"You're being selfish."

"What?" I turned toward him with narrowed eyes.

"Your sister," Tristan said, with a look in his eyes that I'd never seen from him before. A look I never in a billion years would've thought I'd get from him: accusation. He didn't seem to notice the shock on my face, because he went on. "Will _she _survive if you're thirsty? You won't be able to control yourself around her if you don't feed some more."

I was torn between two emotions, shame and anger. Shame at myself and anger toward Tristan. I knew he was absolutely right, of course, but I still hated the way he'd talked to me. The way he'd looked at me.

"Well, what about you?" I shot back, "You couldn't resist my blood, so who's to say you won't take a bite out of my sister? We share the same blood, you know."

"Fine, we'll both hunt!" Tristan was clearly exasperated.

"Fine."

"All right, then."

"All right!" I couldn't help it. I was fuming and there was still a lot of yelling I wanted to do. It didn't help when Tristan started laughing. "What?"

When he finally got his laughter under control he said, "Nothing, it's just…" Chuckle. "I've never seen someone so determined to get the last word in an argument."

I really didn't know what to say to that, so I settled for a simple "shut up" which just made him grin.

Ugh, Englishmen.

* * *

Tristan and I hunted mostly in silence. A few times he tried to start a conversation, but I pretended to be pre-occupied with whatever animal I was feeding on. After his fourth attempt, he gave up. I found myself watching him as he leaped onto a small deer. The gentleness that he usually emanated took a backseat to the instinctive aggressiveness that came with hunting. I swallowed.

"Can I help you with something?" My eyes widened when I realized he'd caught me staring. Tristan's head tilted slightly to the side in amusement at my expression. "Kelly?"

"You hunt good," I stammered, and abruptly turned around to hide my sheer embarrassment. Did I really just say that? It was true though. The way he pounced on the deer, bit into the delicate flesh of the neck, closed his eyes while drinking it in. But what was most extraordinary was the way he was, after. Just like I'd seen him do in Tanya's memories, Tristan set the animal down gently and stroked the spot where he'd bitten. I didn't know what to make of it. I wondered if he'd done that with me.

I shook the thought from my head in disgust. What did it matter what he did after he drained the animal? The fact was, he'd killed it.

A crushing weight enveloped me as I realized that Tristan hadn't actually killed anyone. At least, to the best of my knowledge. He'd attacked me, yeah, but I'm still ―basically― alive aren't I? Can't say the same for the three people that _I _murdered. So who had the right to be mad here?

"We should head back," I murmured, still facing away from him.

Tristan walked to stand beside me, bowed slightly and gestured toward home, "Ladies first."

As soon as the white house loomed into view, I saw Alice beckoning us to come inside. At the door of the bathroom, she held up a hand to stop Tristan. "Not you. You're fine." He cast me a bemused glance before heading to the living room. Where Tanya was.

"What do you mean he's fine?" I asked, irritated. "Am I not fine?"

Alice laughed, shaking her head. "Don't be so sensitive, Kelly."

She offered no further explanations as she opened a cupboard door under the bathroom counter and mumbled to no one in particular, "April makes it three months…your eyes should be…this colour." Alice straightened up and tossed a small box to me in one motion. Now I saw they were contact lenses. The box claimed that the colour inside was 'Sunset Yellow,' but when I put them in, I thought a more fitting name would be 'Stale Beer Yellow.'

Alice and I went to the living room, where most of the Cullens ―and Denalis― were lounging, reading, playing games or watching TV. My eyes immediately went to Tristan to see if he was with Tanya. He wasn't. He and Nessie were playing Scrabble with Jasper and Esme. Tanya was watching Emmett and Garrett play video games, though I noticed she stared at the back of Tristan's head now and then.

It was nice to see that everyone was relaxing. You know, because it's not like we had any serious business to do to save my sister's life.

Edward, reading a newspaper, glanced up sharply at me and frowned. He opened his mouth to say something when Jacob walked in the door. He froze, taking in all the vampires around him. "What's all this?" he asked, eerily calm.

And so, after Edward and Carlisle assured him that the Denalis were only here temporarily, they told him all about the Volturi's postcard (after Carmen skillfully ushered Nessie out of the house – I wondered when, if ever, someone was going to tell her what was happening), how they might know about me, and our plan to get my sister safely to the east coast. Jacob's eyes widened with each sentence.

"You're not _all_ going to Volterra, are you? I mean, Nessie can't possibly go to Volterra, right?" Jacob asked, the panic clear in his eyes.

"Of course not," Edward growled, obviously irked that Jacob would even ask such a question.

Jacob visibly relaxed, "'Kay. That's all I needed to know. And," he directed this last part at me, grudgingly, "if you need any help, just call us."

I straightened up in surprise. "Oh, okay…thanks." Jacob nodded stiffly in reply. He waved everyone goodbye and went out to find Ness.

"So?" I began, moments later, "When can we put the plan in action?"

"You do realize that you'll have to somehow get Natalie to drop out of school and move cross country without letting her see you?" Carlisle asked, thoughtful.

I sighed, "I realize."

From somewhere on my left, Tristan cleared his throat. I turned to him for a fleeting look but something in his eyes held my gaze. His eyes now resembled candlelight rather than a raging campfire, and there was something in them. Something that made me believe he was going to help me with Natalie every step of the way. A shy smile crept onto his lips and solidified my belief.

Despite everything I'd put him through: from being his _singer,_ – it was hard not to be sarcastic while using the term; it was so cheesy – to trying to kill him, to my overall hostility toward him…he was going to help me.

Unbelievable.

"I suggest," said Eleazar, and I was so distracted that I actually jumped at his voice, "that you don't try to move your sister immediately. Observe her – I'm assuming you know where she resides – for a day or two and see if there's anything happening in her life that can help make the move more natural. Make it seem as if it were completely her idea. Just in case Aro somehow gets his hands on her."

I shuddered at the thought. No way was Aro, or any member of the Volturi, laying a filthy finger on my family. I'd make sure of that.

* * *

It had begun to rain while Carlisle drove me, Edward, Alice and Tristan to Seattle where my sister shared an apartment with Adam. He parked the car in the shadow of a massive tree opposite the apartment. It was the perfect spot, since Natalie's living room had windows that stretched the entire length of the wall, giving us the best vantage point. Alice saw that we'd be in a tree, so she'd made everyone wear dark green jackets that went down to the knee for "camouflage." It's actually not as ridiculous as it sounds.

Edward and I scaled the tree first, to get a better look at Natalie's eighth floor window. It was dark inside, not a single light on. It didn't help that the curtains were open since the sky was overcast anyway. The house was a mess. There were containers of take-out stacked on the coffee table, blankets and clothes thrown over the black couch, magazines and books scattered throughout the room. Holy crap.

Sure, my sister was never the neatest between the two of us, but she was never _this _bad. What the hell happened?

"No one's home," Alice's voice came out of nowhere. "Carlisle looked in the parking lot for the car that you described but it wasn't there, and Tristan did some asking in the lobby and the doorman said they'd both gone out a couple hours ago." Then she turned to the window and her eyes widened at the chaos inside. "Is it always like that?"

"No, no the last time I was here, it was spotless." I said, recalling my last visit. It was last year, when Natalie had pneumonia. Adam was in Australia to study the marine life, so my mom and I had flown to Seattle to nurse her back to health. "Can we go inside?"

"Are you sure?" Edward asked. "Her scent will be all over the place."

"I can handle it," I said. "We didn't go to Port Angeles these past three months for nothing, right?"

We dropped back to the ground and decided that only two of us should go in. There was no way we could sneak five vampires past the doorman. Of course I was going, but Edward let me have the choice of who to have my back.

It was ridiculous, stupid, mind-boggling, irrational and made no sense whatsoever, but I found myself wanting Tristan.

Our eyes met, and he seemed to understand. Funny how that works.

Tristan managed to convince the guy at the front desk that we were visiting some friends and that no, he did not need to call them to make sure. The elevator ride was awkwardly quiet, with neither of us knowing what to say to the other. Neither of us could explain why on earth I'd want Tristan with me when I hadn't kept my hatred for him a secret.

Hatred. What an ugly word.

The elevator doors opened on the eighth floor, and I realized we didn't have a way in. Beside me, Tristan seemed to be thinking the same thing, "Dammit, forgot to get the guy to give us a key."

Suddenly, there was a buzzing sound from my jacket pocket. I reached in to find a cell phone that Alice must have slipped in. "Check your right jeans pocket," I read aloud, confusion colouring my voice. I glanced up, and Tristan's face matched my tone. He raised his eyebrows, as if saying _Well? _So I did, and pulled out two bobby pins.

"Looks like we're breaking in," Tristan chuckled. "May I?" he held his hand out to me. I dropped the pins onto his palm and he skillfully picked the keyhole of Natalie's apartment. It took a few minutes, but finally he pushed the door wide open and grinned at my bewildered expression. "I went through a phase when I was fourteen," he explained.

"Isn't breaking into someone's house a crime?" I joked. "And aren't you a lawyer?"

Tristan shrugged, suddenly somber. "Not anymore."

Well that wiped the smile off my face.

We stepped into the messy apartment in silence, having to tiptoe in some areas where it was particularly cluttered. There was a weird scent in the air. Not one that made my throat burn, but it seemed familiar though I couldn't place exactly where I'd encountered it before. It made my nose wrinkle.

There was something peeking out from under the couch that caught my eye. A photo album. I picked it up and saw that it was filled with my and Natalie's baby pictures. The first page had two pictures from when Natalie was born, and when I was born three years later. We looked almost identical. Pink, chubby, with alert green eyes and black curls. We'd both been born with curly hair that straightened out as we grew up. The next few pages held memories from various birthdays, Halloweens, picnics and random, precious candids. A lump of nostalgia and sadness formed in my throat, so I quickly tucked the album back under the couch exactly as I'd found it.

I looked around for Tristan and saw him in the kitchen. He was staring at something on the fridge, and I knew exactly what he was seeing. Silly pictures of Natalie and Adam in a photo booth, a collage I'd made for Natalie's twenty-first birthday, and magnets from the fourteen different states she'd visited. I stood beside him and examined a magnet from Hershey, Pennsylvania that looked like chocolate.

"I miss chocolate," I sighed, mostly to myself.

"I miss crisps," Tristan mumbled.

I stared at him, "Crisps?"

"Yeah, you know. Potato crisps," he said, like this should be obvious.

"Oh, you mean chips," I replied, walking toward Natalie's bedroom.

"I _mean_ crisps," Tristan said, following me. "The things that go crunch."

"Yeah. Potato chips."

Tristan just sighed and muttered "Americans" under his breath, causing me to scowl. The comeback I had in store died on my lips when I entered my sister's room. It was just as cluttered as the rest of the apartment, if not worse, but the thing that silenced me was the sight of the bedside table. Every inch of the table was covered with orange plastic bottles; the type doctors give prescription pills in. I picked up a bottle to read the label. It had Natalie's name on it.

They all had Natalie's name on it.

_Take two caplets daily for pain._

_Take three times a day with meals for nausea._

_Take as needed for headaches._

And on and on it went, different pills for different reasons, with different dosage recommendations. I realized the smell was stronger in here. More concentrated. Why was it _so _familiar?

"Are these all your sister's?" Tristan's voice cut through my thoughts. He picked up a bottle for joint pain and frowned. "Isn't she a little too young for joint pain?"

"I don't know. I mean, no, of course she is. But…I don't know where all these pills came from."

Tristan placed the bottle exactly where he'd found it, "Could it be an addiction?"

"Of course not!" I snapped. My sister didn't do drugs. She didn't smoke, didn't drink. "Natalie's clean as snow. And besides, she wouldn't leave these bottles in plain sight even if she _were_ an addict, would she?"

"Maybe Adam's a druggie, too," Tristan suggested.

I glared at him, "You don't know what you're talking about."

He shrugged – which was infuriating – and walked over to the dresser, gazing into a picture frame. "Cute kids," he said, turning to show me the photo. It was of when Natalie and I were seven and four years old, both of us dressed as fairies for Halloween.

Tristan peered into the corner of the picture. "This was taken in 1995. My brother and I were Power Rangers that year."

That caught me off-guard, "You have a brother?" He nodded.

"His name's Andrew. He's your age, actually." Tristan set the frame down but kept his hand on the dresser, as if to steady himself. His face twisted in pain, such pain that I instinctively stepped closer to him, trying to find some way to comfort him. "Do you want to know what my last words to him were? Even I don't know. It's been so long since I last saw him, I can't even remember."

"Tristan, I'm…so sorry," I said after a slight pause. "I didn't kn ― you never said anything about―"

Tristan shook his head to cut me off. He smiled. The sad smile of someone who was in pain but didn't want to burden others by showing it.

I felt like a million pound sack of worthless. How on earth could I be so mad at Tristan about biting me that I'd forgotten how much strength it must've taken for him to not finish me off. How could I have been so self-centered that I didn't realize that everything that'd been happening to me had happened to him, too?

"Who changed you?" I whispered.

"I don't know; it all happened too fast," Tristan said, not quite looking me in the eye. Snippets of scattered memories flashed through his mind.

_Tristan coming out of JFK airport, stopping to breathe in the crisp winter air of New York; him in his hotel room, flipping through a guide book; him hailing a cab in front of the west entrance to Central Park. And suddenly, Tristan's being grabbed from behind, pulled back into the park and there's a pressure at his shoulder, followed by hot, unbelievable pain. _

A pain that I was all too familiar with.

Tristan reached up and undid the first few buttons of his shirt. My eyes bulged. What was he _doing_? He pulled at the shirt until most of his upper body was showing. My eyes travelled from his smooth chest and rested on the mangled skin of his shoulder where he was bitten. Tristan chuckled humourlessly.

"He was pretty violent," Tristan grimaced, then he looked up and his expression softened. "I wasn't quite so rough with you."

The words sent a shiver through me. Tristan reached his hand out to me, but paused, "May I?" he asked. May what? May he what? He took my confused silence as a yes and slowly unzipped my jacket. I froze; he was close enough now that our breaths mingled. He sighed when he saw the scar he left between my neck and my shoulder, "Sorry."

Before anything else could happen, we heard the sound of a lock turn.


	17. The Door

**Well, three weeks is better than three months, yeah? Would've been sooner, but teachers have absolutely no respect for personal lives. *eye roll***

**Disclaimer: I do not, nor will I ever own Twilight. Unless Mrs. Meyer suddenly decides she doesn't want her beloved universe anymore. In which case, I'd be RICH!**

**Anyway.**

**

* * *

**

**17. The Door**

"Crap," I hissed, jumping back from Tristan, "Natalie's home."

Tristan went to the window to see if it would open and he paused.

"Apartment windows don't open, Tristan," I told him while looking for a hiding place.

"Do you feel that?" he asked in a hushed voice, ignoring my earlier statement. I peered at him, annoyed.

"Feel what, panic? Come on, we have to―"

"Someone's watching us."

"_What_?" It was such an unexpected thing for him to say that my voice rose an octave. I clapped my hand over my mouth, praying that no one but Tristan heard me. His head snapped to the bedroom door, then he kneeled down next to the bed, digging out all the clothes stuffed under it. He gestured for me to get under. I hesitated at first, but the sound of the front door opening left me no choice. I dove under the bed, and Tristan went in after me. He then swept the clothes back in over us, so that there were no exposed parts. All there was left to do now was to lie still and be quiet.

"Just a few more steps, babe," that was Adam's voice. It brought back memories from the last time I'd seen him; I tried to shake them away.

The bedroom door swung open, and two pairs of feet came into view. The strange smell that I'd noticed ealier became stronger, this time accompanied with the smell and heat of blood pulsing under the skin. My stomach clenched, my jaws clenched, my fists clenched.

"Hold on to me," Tristan whispered, too low for human ears. His tone left no room for argument.

I wound both my arms around his, and he pulled me closer. I buried my face in his shirt, breathing in the smell of winter, clean fabric and overall vampireness. It helped. It helped a lot.

The mattress above us bounced as someone sat down.

"The doctor said to get plenty of rest. I'll go make you some warm milk, okay?" Adam said soothingly. There was a pause, and then his footsteps led him back to the door.

"Adam?" I clung to Tristan harder at Natalie voice. A million feelings bubbled up inside me all at once. I yearned to have my big sister's protective arms around me. To stroke my hair and tell me stories like she used to when we were little. There was something off about it, though. Her voice, I mean. It was raspy and strained and quiet and not like her at all. Adam stopped just as he turned the door knob.

"Yeah, babe?"

"Thank you. I don't know what I'd do without you," her voice cracked. Adam went back to Natalie's side, and there was a sound that made me think he was kissing her forehead. Then he left the room. We waited as patiently as we could, Tristan and I. The situation was so surreal. Me, a vampire, hiding under my sister's bed while the man who made me a vampire was keeping me from doing anything regretful.

Natalie's breathing had evened out by the time Adam came back a few minutes later. He was about to say something, but shut up once he saw her sleeping. He shuffled around the room a bit and left. We heard the front door click. Had he left?

We lay there for a few extra minutes to make sure. When it was clear that Adam wasn't coming back any time soon and Natalie was snoring lightly, I let go of Tristan and slid out from under the bed. It took my brain a moment to register that the girl lying on the bed was my sister. I stared, uncomprehending. She…she looked…_sick_. Her skin was sallow, there were dark circles under her eyes, her hair looked like someone had pulled bits of it out, and she must have lost twenty or so pounds.

Tristan nudged my arm and handed me a piece of paper. I tore my eyes away from my sister's almost lifeless form. Shivering, despite the layers upon layers of blankets tucked around her. I focused on what Tristan had put in my hand. A note from Adam saying he was going out to get milk and that he'd be right back. I gave the note back to Tristan so he could put it back where Adam left it.

I went back to looking at Natalie. I couldn't take my eyes off her. Where was the vibrant, voluptuous, hyper-as-hell girl that I was so used to?

_What happened to you?_

"Kelly," said Tristan, "we should go." He curled his hand just under my elbow and I let myself be led away. If I hadn't, who knows how long I would've stood there, staring. Tristan's eyes were on me the whole elevator ride, gauging my reaction. I looked up at him.

"How did she look to you?" I asked. I needed someone to validate what I just saw.

He hesitated, obviously trying to find the right words. There was something odd about his expression, I noticed. Like he had something to say, but was holding it back. Finally, he did speak. "She looked ill. Now we know what those pills were for."

I let out a gust of air, supporting myself against the elevator wall. Tristan didn't say anything more. In fact, he turned his back on me completely, looking straight ahead.

Edward, Carlisle and Alice were in the car, anxiously awaiting our return. By the look on their faces, it was clear that they were aware of our almost being caught. I snapped out of my daze, needing to discuss what I just saw with Carlisle who would no doubt know just how sick my sister was.

"I'm so sorry, Kelly!" Alice said, clutching my arm as soon as Tristan opened the door for me. "By the time I saw they were coming back, it was too late to warn you."

I tried to smile at her, "It's fine. We made some interesting discoveries, anyway." I directed my gaze to Edward, practically shoving pictures of Natalie into his brain. Maybe he could describe how she looked like to Carlisle using medical terms or something. After all, he was the one who had accompanied him to that hospital in New York―

_Oh._

The realization came so suddenly, I actually had to lean back in the car seat to take it all in.

That's why that smell in Natalie's apartment was so familiar. _That's _why I was so unnerved by it. It was the same as what I'd smelled at the hospital in New York. When I was hanging around there, looking for donated blood, I could smell sick people.

People sick enough to be in the hospital.

I looked back up to see that Edward and Tristan were having some kind of internal conversation. Both looking pained and tense. That look was back on Tristan's face. He was keeping something from me.

"What is it?" I demanded. "What do you know?"

"I – uh," he was looking extremely uncomfortable now.

"_What?_"

"I've uh, encountered that scent before," he said, eyes downcast. "At least, I vaguely remember it, but Edward just confirmed my suspicions."

"Well? Tell me!" My nerves were seriously frayed.

Tristan finally looked me in the eye, his own were pleading. "Kelly, I really don't―"

I grabbed two fistfuls of his jacket, bringing his face inches away from mine. My voice was dangerously low as I said, "Tell. Me. Now."

Everyone in the car was silent, not even breathing. For an unbearably long moment, Tristan just looked down at me, his eyes full of sorrow. I couldn't understand why. Slowly, he reached up to gently unclenched my fingers from his jacket. He laid my hands in my lap, but didn't let go. He stared right into my eyes. I could feel myself start to fall apart. Starting to shake. Whatever he was going to say next, I knew it wouldn't be good.

And I was right.

"It's cancer," he whispered. "Natalie has cancer."

* * *

Tristan's grip on my hands tightened, as if he was expecting me to start thrashing around, throw a fit, hit him, something. But I was a statue. I mean, how exactly do you react to the news that your sister has cancer? I wanted to cry, yell, scream, kick something, collapse into someone's arms and break windows all at the same time. Instead, all I did was ask a question.

"How do you know?" My voice now matched everyone's expression. Strained. Tense.

"A few months before I left London, my cousin was diagnosed with leukemia," Tristan said, looking away again. I barely noticed that he was still holding my hands. "When I visited him in the hospital, there was the same weird smell. I was the only one who noticed it, though. He got so offended when I mentioned it."

"So," I began, glancing at Edward, "does Natalie have leukemia?"

Edward shook his head, "Each type of cancer has its own scent. From what I gather in both your thoughts, Natalie has a chordoma. It's a type of bone cancer. I'm sorry, Kelly." He added.

"Chordoma," I murmured to no one in particular.

Suddenly, a fragmented memory made its way to my mind. Not much to make out what it actually was, but enough to let you know it was there. I looked over at Alice. Her eyes were wide, and I knew that she'd brought that memory to the surface herself, whatever it was. A small smile of delight played on her lips before immediately being replaced by guilt. Guilt that something good just happened to her, moments after I found out about Natalie's condition, maybe.

"Come on," I said to her, not wanting her to feel bad. "We haven't dug through your memories in a while." I was about to open the car door when I realized my hands were still in Tristan's. He saw where my gaze had landed and abruptly pulled them away, either embarrassed or repulsed. It didn't matter.

I climbed out of the car and scaled the tree, not waiting to see if Alice would follow. To be honest, I wanted a couple of minutes alone. When I got to the top, I leaned against the trunk and hugged my knees to my chest. All I could do was think Natalie's name, over and over again. Natalie…has cancer. It just didn't make any sense! It didn't―

"Kelly?" Alice's gentle voice called up to me from a few branches down. She reached my branch and I scooted down to make room for her. "You don't have to do this," she said, meaning I didn't have to help her remember her past right now when I had bigger fish to fry.

"I know I don't have to. I want to."

She still seemed unsure, so I asked, "What did you see just now?"

"I don't really know," Alice frowned. "It was too fast, too…blurry. I think it had something to do with that Dr. Logan and Phillip."

"Well, that's great! You were bringing it up yourself," I said, squeezing her hand. Alice beamed. Another memory was starting to float up, but vanished suddenly. Alice was distracted. She turned sharply toward the window looking into Natalie's apartment. I followed her gaze and saw that my sister had come out of her room, one hand clutching a blanket around herself and the other holding Adam's note. My heart twisted to see how breakable she looked. How much she resembled someone so much older than twenty-one. She was on her way to the kitchen but then there was a knock on the front door (that's right, these vampire ears hear _everything_).

Natalie shuffled her feet – with some difficulty – to head in the other direction, toward the door. I was getting an extremely bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. If it were Adam on the other side of that door, he'd open it himself, surely. He wouldn't want my sister to exert more energy than was absolutely necessary. Suddenly, I wanted to scream at Natalie, telling her to ignore the door. Go back to bed!

She was four, three, two feet away from the door when it burst open on its own, and two figures in black cloaks grabbed her by the arms.

* * *

**I had butterflies in my stomach the whole time I was writing those last few paragraphs. :( **

**Dear readers, I have news! I'm currently writing a companion story to The Memory Keeper. It'll be sort of like an extras/compilation thing, with different events from this story but told in another character's POV. First chapter is from Tristan's perspective, and it's almost done, so if you want, add me to your Author Alerts so you can know when I post it. :) Thaaaaank you!**


	18. Black Cloaks

**Funny story: I wrote Chapter 18. I accidentally deleted Chapter 18. I cried over Chapter 18. I read books to make myself feel better about Chapter 18. I re-wrote Chapter 18. And now you will read Chapter 18. And you will review Chapter 18. And I will love you for reviewing Chapter 18.**

**

* * *

**

**18. Black Cloaks**

"_Natalie_!"

I hit the ground running before I'm even finished screaming my sister's name. It must have been a thirty-foot drop from the top of the tree where Alice and I had seen Natalie get grabbed by pale hands, and mud and bits of gravel flew up where my sneakers impacted the ground.

"Natalie!"

I barreled past the front door of the apartment building, ignoring the doorman's yelp of surprise, and flew up eight flights of stairs to get to my sister's floor. In a few seconds, I arrived, only to be greeted with an empty corridor. Natalie's door was left wide open, the mess of her apartment displayed like the aftermath of an earthquake.

"Natalie?" I whispered. No answer. Not even a heartbeat to be heard. I stepped inside and checked every room twice. The only thing I found was the blanket that Natalie had clutched around herself. She'd dropped it when they'd taken her. The people in the black cloaks.

I'd seen those cloaks before, in the Cullens' memories.

I raced back down the stairs, my throat dry. Not with thirst, for once.

In the lobby, I saw Alice standing in front of the elevators, eyes staring intently on the rectangular black screens above the doors that showed what floor the elevator was on. "It hasn't moved at all," she said when I approached. "but they're both on the eighth floor."

"There was nobody up there; I checked," I replied. "Alice, did you see anything? You must have, right?"

Alice frowned, "I saw a vision of them taking Natalie just a fraction of a second before they actually did."

"Same here," Edward said, coming toward us. "I heard some muffled thoughts coming from Natalie's direction a second before you called out her name. Then it went silent."

"They couldn't have gotten away so fast. We were right on their tail," I said through gritted teeth, going back outside. The rain had eased up a little for a while, but now thunder was booming across the sky. Pedestrians had mostly retreated indoors, intimidated by the gray clouds that threatened to spill over any minute. No black cloaks in sight.

Adding to my unease was the fact that my body was perfectly quiet. After sprinting up and down the stairs, I should have been sweating, panting for breath, my heart should've been pounding out of its cage. The fact that none of this was happening made me feel like I'd lost something, or that it'd been stolen. It made me want to grab at my own chest just to get a reaction.

"You'll get used to it," Edward had come up behind me, "it'll stop feeling so wrong after a while. Trust me, I—"

He broke off suddenly and turned to Tristan, walking to us. The rain had finally come down, hard, and Tristan's hair was drenched with water.

"Tristan? What do you mean, someone was watching you?" Edward asked.

Tristan shook his head, sending droplets of water flying, "I don't know, it was just...a feeling. Kelly and I were in Natalie's room, by the window, and I felt like I was being watched."

I thought back to when we were looking for a hiding spot and Tristan had frozen, saying the same thing. Could it have been them?

"Kelly!" Alice exclaimed, coming out of the apartment. Her green hood was pulled over her head to keep her hair from getting wet, but I saw enough of her face to see how wide her eyes were. "I saw them! They're taking Natalie to Volterra!"

* * *

"Why are people going so _slow_?" I growled in frustration, both of my fists were clenched tight. My fingers were itching to unlock the door and get out of the car, but Tristan and Alice were in my way on both sides. Though they looked pretty impatient in the traffic jam as well.

"They're just coming home from work," Carlisle sighed, "and this rain isn't doing any good." He tried to increase the speed of the windshield wipers, but no matter how fast they wiped, the rain kept blurring the windows in a matter of milliseconds.

When Edward, Alice, Tristan and I had rushed back to the car where Carlisle was on the phone with Eleazar, informing him of what'd happened, we suggested that we run to the airport to get the first flight out to Italy. But Carlisle had said we couldn't just leave the car, so we thought, sure, why not? We'll just get in the car and race to the airport.

But not even Alice could've predicted the massive traffic jam.

The massive, agonizingly slow-moving traffic jam.

"Carlisle, please," I decided to try one more time to convince him. "Let me run from here—"

"Kelly, you don't even know where the airport is—"

"That doesn't matter! I could get lost a million times and still get there faster than if I'm just sitting in this car!"

Carlisle was about to reply, when Tristan said gently, "Carlisle, imagine if it was Esme. Or one of your kids. You'd want to get to them as soon as possible, no matter what, right?"

"Of course, but—"

"You know I'll go with her," said Edward, "and I know the way."

"I'm going too," Alice chirped.

"And me." Tristan.

Carlisle sighed, but smiled. In a sad sort of way. I figured he didn't really want us to go to Volterra. Edward and Alice – and I suppose me and Tristan, now – were his children after all. I wouldn't want my kids to go off chasing villains. "I guess I can't stop you," he finally said.

I hugged him without thinking, "Thank you!" and reached across Tristan to open the door. He didn't complain as I jumped over him and out into the rain. And I ran.

The others caught up with me in no time, Edward going a bit ahead to lead the way. We were there in only a few minutes. Edward went to buy the plane tickets, while the rest of us stood near one of the entrances, not quite knowing what to do while we waited. Alice pulled out her phone and made a sound of annoyance. Her phone was dripping wet, the battery dead. I realized then that all four of us were soaked. That was probably why the other people in the airport gave us a wide berth. Well, that and their natural aversion to vampires.

Edward came back with four tickets. "Let's get going," he said. "Our plane is boarding already. And that janitor is giving us the stink eye," he added, subtly pointing to an old man behind his shoulder. The man was wearing a blue jumpsuit and scowling at the puddle at our feet. The mop in his hand was held like some sort of weapon.

Alice suppressed a smile. She held out her hands, "Give me your jackets. I'll meet you on the plane." We handed her the jackets and she went to discard them in the bathroom.

"Okay," Edward whispered once we were all aboard the plane. He'd gotten us all to sit in the middle aisle seat; the one with four seats together so that no one else could overhear our conversation. "There's not really any point in making plans, because the Volturi are very unpredictable." An unpleasant shudder went through me at the name. This was the first time it was spoken aloud since Natalie's apartment. Now it was official: the Volturi took my sister.

Edward went on, "Kelly, try to draw as little attention to yourself as possible. Because once Aro takes my hand – and he will – he'll know everything you're able to do. And he'll want you. He'll want you on his team. Tristan, this goes for you, too."

"Doesn't the Volturi already know what Kelly's capable of?" Tristan asked, and the very same question died on the tip of my tongue.

"Yes," Alice answered, "that's what we _assumed_. But there's really no way he could know. Even if he sent a shield similar to Bella – a mind shield – they'd have to get pretty close to us to know so much. And so, Jasper would've been able to sense their emotions, and I could see the decisions they make, and Jacob would no doubt smell the new scent, but—"

"But none of that happened," I finished, seeing where she was going with this. "So unless Aro sent a ghost...he can't know. Right?"

Tristan still looked unconvinced. I was too, but I also _wanted_ to believe Alice's theory.

"_If_ that's true," Tristan said, putting extra stress on the 'if', "then why did he take Natalie?"

There was a slight pause, then Edward sighed, "Like I said, the Volturi – Aro especially – are unpredictable. Right now, all we can do is hope to convince him to release Kelly's sister and get out of there alive."

"For now, Kelly, it would be best for you to calm yourself down. You're not doing Natalie any favors by stressing yourself out," Alice said soothingly.

So, for the next several hours, I tried to calm down. But relaxing while my big sister – the one who taught me how not to get lost in the subway; the one who went rollerblading with me on the roof; the one who, when I was twelve, yelled at me so hard when I accidentally broke her laptop that I cried, but then later found me in the stair well and hugged me tight and told me she was sorry until we both started crying again – trying to relax while she was in the hands of a sadistic bunch of bloodsuckers, while she was _sick_, no less...it wasn't easy.

We acted as human as possible – pretending to sleep when the humans slept, pretending to eat while they ate, even going to the bathroom on occasion. Even with all that acting, I noticed the humans still stared at us when they thought we didn't notice.

I guess I couldn't blame them. It _was _probably a strange sight. We were all pale, all with strange-coloured eyes, all still slightly wet from running in the rain, with no body heat to dry ourselves. Oh, and beautiful. I looked at my fellow vampires and no one could deny how beautiful they were. To my right, Alice had somehow gotten hold of another cell phone and was now talking softly into it, to Jasper. Some stray locks of her black hair clung to her forehead or her neck, but with a skillful sweep of her fingers, she fluffed her hair and made it go back to its spiky style. To _her _right was Edward. He was "sleeping" but still managed to look like a Greek god. As usual. The corner of his mouth twitched as he heard the comment.

Almost subconsciously, my eyes slid to Tristan, on my left. His usually light hair had been made darker by the rainwater, curling ever so slightly in a way that made me kind of want to touch it. There were tiny drops of water clinging to his eyelashes. Lashes that framed eyes that were getting lighter with each passing day. Tristan was pretending to watch a movie. I say pretending, because he was way too tense to actually be watching it. My eyes travelled down to his clenched jaws, his normally full lips that were drawn into a tight line. His posture was disturbingly straight, rigid, and his hands were clutching the armrests so tightly that he was carving little dents into them. Then I realized: he hadn't had as many human immunity sessions as I had. He usually seemed fine around humans, but it must be the confined space. Too many humans in too small an area.

His eyes suddenly flickered down to mine, and I quickly looked away, absolutely mortified at being caught staring.

But then, because I could still feel the tension rolling off of him, I turned back and said, "Are you okay?"

If he thought it was a stupid question, he didn't show it. Instead, his face softened a little and he smiled. "Fine. It's just a little crowded in here, is all."

I nodded to show that I understood, which I did. "You were great in Natalie's apartment, though. You know, under the bed."

Oh my god, did I just _say_ that? It sounded so dirty, my face should've been burning up with how embarrassed I felt. "Thanks for that, by the way," I said quickly, to cover up the previous statement. It didn't work; Tristan was grinning ear to ear, no tension left in his body now. He had to choke back his laughter before he could talk. But when he did talk, he didn't comment about the bed thing. Much to my relief.

"You're welcome," he said, smiling now, instead of grinning. "But it was as much for me as it was for you. Your sister smelled...a lot like you did."

"Oh. Either way, I'm glad you were there." The words came out freely, easily. It surprised me, to be talking to him like this. I wouldn't have thought it possible a few months ago. A few weeks ago, even. Apparently, Tristan was thinking the same because he just stared at me for a second, disbelief clear on his face. But he recovered and smiled shyly.

I was surprised, again, when he slid his right arm back on the armrest. Not much, but enough so that his elbow was touching my elbow. Our skin was separated by multiple layers of clothing, but I felt warmth coming from him. His eyes watched me, waiting for my reaction. It was like he was asking if this was okay. I didn't answer.

But I didn't pull away, either.

Not even when there was a small _ding _and the pilot's voice came on the intercom, telling us to fasten our seatbelts and return our seats to their upright positions.

Because we were landing.

* * *

**1. Does anyone else wonder why vampires feel warm to each other? Makes no sense to me. :S**

**2. If you're a fan of either The Hunger Games, The Mortal Instruments, Nightworld, The Percy Jackson series, The Mediator series or all of the above, then check out the story _One Island, Five Boys_ by the _Red Dot Society_. It's a collab story of EPIC proportions, and it's awesome, and it's funny, and yeah, I wrote parts of it and am now shamelessly promoting myself. Seriously though, take a gander. x)**

**Danke!**


	19. Milk and Paper

**Oh, my. I believe we are almost done with this story. Three or four more chapters, maybe? Hm. :(**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the pressure of doing well in my exams.**

**

* * *

**

**19. Milk and Paper**

The first thing that struck me about Italy was the hot air. After months of winter and rain –_so_ much rain – it was a welcome change. The four of us pulled up the hoodies of our sweaters to keep the sun off our skin as we got off the plane and Tristan convinced some cab driver at the airport to let us borrow his taxi.

Alice drove us to Volterra, memories rolling off of her like steam. Memories of a dark time when Edward, thinking Bella was dead, had tried to provoke the Volturi to get himself killed. It seems the Cullens had an awfully complicated history with the older vampires.

"Almost there," Alice whispered. For the first time since I'd met her, she looked terrified. Edward looked no better; his jaws were clenched so tightly it was a wonder how his whole face didn't shatter.

Outside the windows, the town was beautiful. Beautiful and old. You could practically read the history in the worn cobblestone streets; see beauty in the way people walked on those streets, laughing, chattering with one another or taking photos. I got the feeling that we were a bubble of gloom, the four of us. An invader among these jovial humans. There was a group of girls, about my age, sitting outside a café and giggling. Older people sitting at other tables glanced at them every once in a while, irritated at how loud they were being. A pang went through me. I used to be one of those girls, laughing with Lex and Cammie about absolutely nothing, causing other people to send us death glares. I wondered what my friends back home – my pre-vamp home – were doing right now. Maybe they were watching a movie. Eating frozen yoghurt? I wondered how my parents were.

"Kelly," Tristan said, fingers lightly tapping my shoulder, "are you ready?"

I shook off my home-sickness and realized the car had stopped moving. Alice had parked right in front of an alleyway. I glanced back at Tristan, who was looking at me with serious eyes, and nodded once.

Edward, Alice, Tristan and I filed out of the car, keeping our faces away from the sun. Edward led us down the shadowed alley, his shoulders squarely set. We'd barely gone halfway down the path when a hooded figure appeared out of nowhere – _literally. _It just suddenly materialized in front of us, stopping Edward from advancing.

Alice and I yelped; the boys cursed under their breaths.

"Who…" Tristan began, but trailed off as he took in what the figure was wearing.

A black cloak.

Actually, now that I could see it more closely, I saw it wasn't really black. Just a dark shade of gray. Deathly white hands reached up to pull back the hood, revealing the face of a young woman with dull crimson eyes. She had wheat-coloured hair, pinned back to show off a face that would've been lovely, if it weren't for her blank expression. And something about the way her features were arranged…my eyes kept sliding over her face, looking away without meaning to. "Welcome," she said, not sounding very welcoming. Her voice had some sort of accent to it, but I couldn't figure out which country it belonged to. "We were expecting you a while ago."

"Who are you?" Alice asked at the same time I said, "Where's my sister?"

The woman only smiled blandly. "Follow me and you will find the answer to both questions."

She spun around and silently padded her way down the alley which, I noticed, was starting to slope downward. The strangest thing kept happening as we walked: sometimes the woman would disappear. Just…gone. Maybe it was because I kept glancing over her head or looking off to the sides for some reason, but I could have sworn she was transparent, shimmering in and out of my vision.

We reached a dead end. Without hesitating, the woman slipped through an opening in the ground. A drain with the grate removed. Alice followed through, then me, then Tristan and Edward last. It was dim and wet down there, the air cold but stuffy. I found Alice's footsteps in front of me and caught up with her, linking my arm with hers.

"You okay?" she asked.

"Sure," I whispered. "Not creeped out at all."

Yeah, that was a lie. The longer we walked, the more time I had to think of what we'd find when we reached our destination. I'm pretty sure I would've curled up into a ball of pathetic anxiety if it weren't for Alice's reassuring presence beside me, or Tristan. He was a little ways behind me, but every few moments he'd brush his hand against my shoulder or my back or my arm.

Whether he did it to make sure I was all right, or to assure me he was there, it didn't matter. The only things I could think about when he touched me was how it made me shiver and how nice it felt. For that I was grateful.

Finally, we reached a dull-looking reception room. The scent of a human made me look up sharply and I said, "Natalie?" before I registered that this was not Natalie's scent. This human smelled healthier, happier. The crushing disappointment didn't leave any room for embarrassment.

"Camille, please inform Aro of our arrival," said the vampire woman, and again, I found myself surprised by her presence. It seemed so fleeting. The human named Camille smiled politely, nodded and pushed a button that opened an elevator door for us. The further down we went, the more I felt like being sick.

The metallic doors opened to reveal a short corridor leading to a heavy-looking wooden door. The woman opened it without trouble.

We stepped inside.

* * *

My eyes scanned the room, looking for Natalie. No sign of her. Instead, I saw three regal figures sitting on throne-like wooden chairs. Two with long, jet black hair and one with ashy white hair. Each of them had several other figures milling around them: bodyguards.

"Ah, well done, Susan! You've brought my old friends back here safely," the one in the middle chair – Aro – exclaimed. Maybe 'exclaimed' isn't the right word. His voice was immeasurably soft, filled with genuine excitement. This was the voice of the vampire who took my sister?

Susan – the name fit her perfectly in its plainness – gave Aro a smile without teeth and retreated to the far side of the room, where she completely blended in among the other Volturi members.

"Welcome back, my friends," Aro slid off his chair gracefully and came toward us. His eyes – a milky sort of red – glanced over at Tristan and me. They lingered on me. "Ah, and your new additions. Welcome, welcome."

"Thank you, Aro," Edward said politely enough, but the way his eyes darkened, you could tell it took a lot of effort.

"How is the rest of your family? And where is your Bella?"

Edward stiffened. "The family's fine."

"Come," said the old vampire, holding out his papery white hands and ignoring the fact that his second question went unanswered, "don't be a stranger."

Edward's hands clenched once, twice before he took a step closer to Aro. Both of their eyes closed in concentration as they read one another's thoughts. I glanced around the room once more, recognizing various members of the Volturi guard from the Cullens' memories but still not seeing my sister. It took all of my self-control not to demand to know where she was. I couldn't draw excess attention to myself.

At last, Aro let go of Edward's hands. His eyes were wide as he looked over at me.

"Fascinating," he breathed. His gaze was like a hand; I could physically feel it as he looked me over. Fighting the instinct to cringe away, I planted my feet more firmly on the stone floor and stared right back. Oddly, this only seemed to please Aro.

Oookay…

"Aro, when you sent the postcard," Alice said, diverting his attention, "you led us to believe a few things…"

I could tell Alice was torn between wanting to know how Aro knew and not wanting to say my name in front of him. Good thing Aro was good at filling in the blanks.

"Oh, yes, I see your concern. It's a most delightful story, really. Let me introduce – well, re-introduce, I suppose – you to Susan. Susan, show yourself."

The woman who had led us down here peeled herself away from the wall and reluctantly came toward us. Aro beamed at her. "She is my latest treasure," he gushed. "One of Heidi's catches; we didn't even notice her until she was the last one in the room. I am sure you've noticed her extraordinary ability to disappear. Not literally, of course, but there is something about her that makes our eyes simply slide over her."

Edward's eyebrows were knit so tightly it seemed like he would leave a permanent line. "I can't hear her, either. She's a shield."

Aro's eyes twinkled with pride. "The most powerful shield. She can even evade Alice's visions."

"And Jasper couldn't feel her," Alice frowned.

"Susan is very powerful," Aro repeated. "A wonderful informant."

"And what do you need an informant for?" Edward said, steel in his voice.

The Volturi leader with the snow white hair, Caius, spoke up for the first time. "To make sure you Cullens don't break any more of our rules, of course. You cannot be trusted, you've proven that time and time again."

"Hush, brother," Aro lightly scolded. "That is not so. We were simply curious to see if you accumulated any more of our kind with gifts. They always seem to find their way to you. And I see that I was right." At the last bit, Aro gave Tristan and me a wide smile.

That was it, the fact that he had the _nerve_ to smileat me as if he hadn't done anything wrong. It made my blood boil and I thought, Screw it. "What have you done to my sister?"

Aro's eyebrows rose like he was surprised. Right. "My dear, we haven't done anything to your sister. She's safe, if you wish to see her."

"Aro," said Caius's stern voice.

"Oh, right. Silly me," Aro chuckled like he'd just forgotten his car keys or something. "We _would_ like something in exchange. A trade, we'll say."

The expressions didn't change on Edward's and Alice's faces, which told me that this was what they'd expected all along. I, however, wasn't prepared for this. I felt my stomach sinking. Joining the Volturi was an idea as repulsive as…well, there's nothing to compare it to. Joining the Volturi is just a repulsive idea. Period.

But of course, I'd do it if it were the only way to save Natalie. I'd do anything for Natalie.

"How do we know you're telling us the truth about Natalie's welfare?" Tristan demanded. He'd been somewhat behind me, but now he placed himself by my side.

Aro gazed at Tristan a moment, before turning to Caius. "It cannot hurt to show them, can it?"

Without waiting for a reply, Aro waved a hand at two vampires whose names I knew were Felix and Demitri. There was something about Demitri's body that seemed slightly familiar and I realized that he must have been one of the pricks who hijacked Natalie. Tall, broad-shouldered and a regal posture. I hated him.

The two went into some back room away from my view. I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from following them if it weren't for Edward placing a mindful hand on my elbow.

"You will see that we have been treating your sister as our guest for the short while she has been with us," Aro said. "Now, I don't mean to sound like a broken record, but Edward, Alice, the offer still stands from before. There is always room for you two here. And think, if you do, then you will be reuniting Kelly with her dear sister."

"No," I said before Edward or Alice could so much as think. "They didn't want to join you before and they're not going to join you now. If anyone is, it'll be me."

Aro laughed – a voice full of bells. "Wonderful!"

"Kelly," Tristan said, voice low in my ear – not that that helped shield what he was saying to me, "Don't be daft. Natalie's not going to be happy about that."

"You don't know what would make Natalie happy," I said, maybe harsher than was necessary.

"Look, one thing your sister and I have in common: we're both the eldest child. And it's general knowledge that eldest children don't want their baby siblings to be a hero for them."

"That's not general knowledge," I argued.

"Whatever! In situations like these it is."

"You're—"

"Kelly?"

The voice – _her _voice – stopped me from talking, but I didn't turn toward it. Suddenly, I wasn't sure if I could look at her. Not in this setting. Not with my eyes the colour that they were. But because I knew I was being irrational, I turned.

And saw a vision straight from a nightmare.

Natalie looked just as she had the last time I saw her, but the hulking vampires on either side of her, gripping her frail arms, made her look smaller and even sicker than before. Oh, God.

Her eyes, though there were dark circles under them, were the only things that looked like the Nat I knew. Bright green and capable of drilling holes into your soul if she felt like it. Right now she was feeling like it.

"Nat," I whispered, so softly I'm not sure she heard.

"So it's true. You're a… God, I can't even say it."

"She's a vampire, yes," Aro said gleefully. I felt like punching him. Natalie probably felt the same by the way she glared at him. Her eyes softened when she shifted them back to me. She was about to say something but was cut off by her own cry of pain. Her knees buckled and she doubled over, held up only by the clamps of Felix and Demitri's hands.

"Nat!" I yelled, and started running for her without even thinking. Out of nowhere, a small girl with pale brown hair stood in my path and I was on my knees, on my back, hands on either side of my head, not able to think about anything but the excruciating pain. It was a pain worse than when I was changing from human to vampire. At least then I knew where the venom was.

But this…this pain was indescribable. It was like it was attacking me from inside and outside my body all at once. From a faraway place, I heard someone – Natalie? – shout, "Why is she screaming? _What the hell are you doing to her?_"

Finally, finally, finally, the pain stopped. I squinted my eyes open to see the small girl – Jane, I think – smiling down at me. She skipped away from me to join the rest of them. I lifted myself halfway up with a hand and used the other to rub my forehead where there was a slight echo of the pain.

"Crap," I said, because that's how I felt.

Tristan rushed forward to help me the rest of the way up. From the way Edward was standing behind him, with arms partly extended, it looked like Edward had had to hold Tristan back.

"I apologize," said Aro. "Sometimes Jane is over-enthusiastic."

A few feet away from me, Natalie – still held by the hulks of Volterra – caught my eye. I knew exactly what she'd say if these were normal circumstances: _"If by 'over-enthusiastic' you mean 'a bitch' then yeah, she's definitely over-enthusiastic."_

But these weren't normal circumstances and right then Natalie was looking at me like she'd just seen me die. Her eyes were glassy; filled with liquid pain. I looked down at her arms, turning red from the pressure of her bodyguards' grips. Was that why she cried out earlier? No, it must be hurting now but she looked like she was handling it. Probably it was the cancer.

The thought stung now, made real by thinking it in her presence.

"So," Aro smiled at me, "you're going to join us."

I ignored my sister's look of horror. "Yes. If that's what it takes."

"Kelly, _no_," Nat said with as much force as she could muster. "Don't you—agh!" Her face contorted in pain as either Felix or Demitri pressed tighter into her arms. Jane was right beside Natalie, reminding me with that infuriating smile of hers to stay where I was.

Again, my blood boiled. How could they treat her like this? Don't they know she's sick? How could I have let this happen? Why is Aro _always freaking smiling_?

And still he kept smiling as he held his repulsive paper hands out to me, saying disgusting nonsense like "Come, child" and "Welcome to your new family."

I made the decision a split second before my skin came into contact with his. I flung my plan to Edward's brain, my decision to Alice's mind and just prayed that Tristan would catch on.

Aro wrapped his hands around mine.

His smile fell away.

Finally melted off when he saw.

* * *

**Be kind and review?**


End file.
